


Tougher Than The Rest

by GlitterCake20



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Blow Jobs, Body Positive, Cuddling, Dates, Developing Relationship, Dick Pics, Dorky Brett, First Dates, Fluff, Friendship, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Insecurities, Josh needs to die, Kissing, M/M, Misunderstandings, Model Liam Dunbar, Romantic Fluff, Self Acceptance, Self-Esteem Issues, Slow Burn, Soft Boys, Strangers to Lovers, Sweet Liam, Teacher Theo Raeken, body issues, chubby Theo Raeken, cute dates, hot make out sessions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-15
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-06-10 19:17:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 44,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15298257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlitterCake20/pseuds/GlitterCake20
Summary: Theo is horribly self conscious about his body, but a pair of blue eyes sees him for what he truly is.~"Why don't you care? When you look the way you do… why don't you care that I'm not perfect?”“Because we ask for someone to care about, maybe fall in love with. Not for the package they come in.”~





	1. Chapter 1

There are a couple of things worse than being ignored when you're out with your friends- Being hit on only to realize it's a way to get talking to your hot friend is one of them. What's worse than that? Being the second option when said hot friend bats the guy and suddenly you look good enough. What's worse than that?? Does it even get worse you ask? Theo Raeken would say yes. Of course it does.

 

What's worse than that is feeling like every single pair of eyes are on your belly or your muffin top,-even if it's not that much of a muffin top. You know it's there and you know they know it's there. And you know your friend doesn't have one… he has deliriously flat and ripped abs. They know that too; it is in the way they stare when he walks past and quickly glance away when you step into their line of sight.

 

Theo rolls his eyes turning back to the bar when yet another hopeful idiot brushes up to Brett, feigning an interest in his tattoo sleeve just so they can touch him. He's polite, and he answers their questions but he knows Brett hates it, these guys aren't his type at all. Brett likes them short and stocky. Theo’s had to pretend to be the boyfriend one too many times, only to be told by the other guys that Brett can do better while giving Theo a dirty once over.

 

People are horrible shits and Brett's broken a few noses defending Theo to these guys. Theo  on the other hand, pretends not to care anymore.  He ignores whoever comes to chat to his group because it's always for Tracey or Brett, never him. He doesn't even greet anymore because he knows their motives, divulges a fake name when they ask to sound polite. 

 

The guy talking to Brett seems to be successful since Brett has agreed to a dance and they head to the floor. Theo turns to watch them. Tracey has two guys swirling around her, he's not sure where they start and she begins. The guy and Brett are grinding in a very not safe for work way, and Theo is chilling at the bar by himself. As always.

 

He pulls down on the hem of his shirt, self conscious and hyper aware of how his jeans cut into his flesh. He catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror in the side of the bar and he sees what he always sees- a nice guy with a handsome face and good hair, but apparently it's not enough. 

 

Seems that if you're a little overweight, the fact that you have two degrees, can speak 4 languages and teach high school biology along with the pretty face, really doesn't matter. No one gets as far as asking what he does or what his hobbies are… sometimes they don't even bother asking his name. 

 

“Oh fuck.” he mumbles as he spots Josh Diaz heading his way. Josh Diaz, the dick-jock that he somehow ended up crushing on. He regrets everything. Theo flushes and starts trembling before the dude has even reached him. Theo’s had a crush on the guy since high school. Josh's eyes however, are on the dance floor, on Brett. Obviously.  

 

Josh realises a while later that Theo's standing there, not dancing, avoiding, and saunters up to him.

 

“Hey T.” his mouth tips up and he leans casually on the counter beside Theo. The way he's looking at Theo makes him squirm… Josh's gaze is just too intimidating and the asshole knows it, he likes having the upper hand with boys. 

 

“It's not serious.” Theo says, he pulls down on his shirt again, well aware that he's tomato red.

 

“What's not serious?”

 

Theo nods to the dance floor, to Brett and the guy, “Brett and High Hopes. It's not serious, they just met.” Because that's what Josh really wants to hear.

 

He hopes for one dumb second that Josh  will say ‘I don't care I'm here for you’ but this is not the movies and Theo's never that lucky.  Josh answers with a cocky grin and heads off.

 

Theo stands watching as Josh simply worms his way in between Brett and a brutally offended High Hopes. He feels sorry for a bit, but laughs when Josh glares him off and he scurries back to his table. He never had a chance. The other two grind and feel and touch - they never kiss, and Theo's not complaining, his heart couldn't take it anyway - but it hurts all the same.

 

He tears his eyes away and they fall on the door just as a crew of unfamiliar faces walk in. Four guys. Two are holding hands, not fazed by the club scene, more with one another. The tall one with curly dark hair heads straight for the bar and slides up to a bunch of girls.  

  


The other guy though... He’s still standing in the doorway, eyebrows raised as he checks out the scene in front of him, fidgets with his jacket a bit, not used to places like this, it’s obvious. He's short, probably shorter than Theo. He's dressed really well and the clothes seem to fit so perfectly, not too tight but still hugging all his muscles - god he's buff - just right. Gorgeous. Even in the dim lights of the club the guy’s eyes look almost luminescent, such a bright and brilliant blue that Theo can’t look away. He looks until the guy’s looking at him and then he freaks and spins around.  Well… that wasn't obvious…

 

He panics, full on crisis mode, and he’s blushing even if no one can see him, heart racing. Don't come over here. Don't come over. Don’t come…

 

“Hi…”

 

_Fuckingshitgoddammitwhatthefuck?!_

The turns, forgets what words are, “Heyllo” he clears his throat, pinching the bridge of his nose. _Wow._

 

“Heyllo?” he’s smiling at least, probably thinks he’s in a comedy club and Theo’s the comedian.

 

Theo straightens out, forcing himself to look at the guy, “Yeah, don't you know that greeting? Everyone here does.” he shrugs, takes a sip of his drink, it does nothing to hide his smile though.

 

“Well, I’m new…” New Guy’s smiling again, and Theo reckons he really needs to stop that. It’s awfully distracting.

 

“Don’t come out much, huh?”

 

“It’s not my thing, no.” He shakes his head and points to the rest of his friends, “They dragged me. The whole ‘you need to get out more and meet new people and bang some guys’ speech.”

 

“Oh… wow…”

 

“Sorry! That was so… I’m sorry!” he's covering his mouth with his hand but his eyes are still smiling.

 

“No, no I mean it’s refreshing to hear the honesty.”  

 

“Was just tired of them nagging I guess so here I am.”

 

“So then what do you do with yourself when you’re not a wild party animal?”  Theo teases and the guy seems to like it, he’s grinning and looks away for a second.

 

“If I’m not at the gym or working, then I guess I binge watch myself into a coma?  You?”

 

“I uh,” fuck, he’s never seen the inside of a gym. The thought makes him cringe, “I study, or teach, or I’ll be here… with them…” he points to Brett and Tracey on the dance floor, surrounded by thirsty looking people but New Guy barely looks away

 

“Why aren’t you dancing then?”

 

 _Because I hate being the only one who doesn’t get grinded on and end up dancing on my own like a loser._  “Not really good at it I guess.” he tugs at his shirt again, making sure it covers his love handles and that it doesn't stretch too tight over his stomach. Liam sees him fiddle but his eyes focus on Theo’s instead.

  


“I refuse to believe that. You look like you can move.” now the guy’s eyes are skating down his body, and just like with Josh he squirms, but in a good way, still kind of self conscious, but this guy doesn't make him feel ugly and like a second prize. He hasn't even noticed Brett at all, hasn't even looked around since he came to talk to Theo.

 

“Uh…”

 

“Wanna dance with me? Let me prove you wrong?”

 

“I don't, uh, I don't know your name…” as if that’s a totally valid reason to get out of dancing with someone.

 

He laughs, “Does you dancing with me depend on whether you like my name?”

 

“Oh. No. Sorry. It’s just that people don't ever ask me that. I'm sure I’ll like your name either way.” he’s bright red again, fumbling with his glass, picking it up then putting it down. He stops when New Guy looks genuinely surprised at that, frowning.

 

“What? What do you mean? No one in here ever asks you to dance? Like no one??” he gestures out to the dance floor, to the hundreds of people who don’t even know Theo exists.  

 

Theo shakes his head and looks down.

 

“Why??”

 

Theo gives him a small smile, “This…” he gestures up and down his body, “Probably not up to their standards.”

 

New Guy grimaces and shakes his head, “What fucking idiots. Well, will you dance with me? If I tell you my name is Liam, will you dance with me?” He’s dipping slightly so he can catch Theo’s eyes, and when he does, he smiles pretty and bright and Theo’s lifts his head.

 

“Do you really wanna dance with someone called Gerrymandering?” 

 

“Jesus no. Good luck with your life.” Liam nods and waves, pretends to turn away.

 

Theo laughs out loud and Liam follows, he sounds fucking fantastic when he laughs, Theo really wouldn't mind to hear it again. Liam’s kind of great. Liam also looks exactly like heartbreak.

 

“I’m Theo.”  he says as Liam slips a hand into his, leading them to the floor. His heart's racing, not sure what this clear ten out of ten is even doing with him, “Sure Gerry.” Liam winks and shouts over his shoulder against the loud music.

 

They join the dancing bodies on the floor, there's grinding and sweating and touching all over and Theo's mouth is running dry. And if he thought his heart stopped when Liam took his hand, he’s sure his mind has now broken entirely too. Liam's slips his arm around his waist, his chubby waist, and he knows the guy must feel the little rolls there.

 

Liam pulls him closer, his fingers curl into Theo’s hip, he squeezes as they begin to move. Liam’s a good dancer, doesn’t miss a beat, and he smells fantastic so Theo lets his hands ride of Liam’s muscular arms, feels every curve and bump, and they’re dancing impossibly close and Liam’s hands feel like shooting stars all over his skin.

 

Liam leans back slightly, eyes flicking between Theo’s and his lips, “Do you uh… kiss guys named Liam too?” and then Theo’s heart just about gives in. In a bad way.

 

“I…” his shoulders drop, and he lets out a small sigh, “Yeah but guys like Liam don’t kiss guys like me..” Because they don’t, they never have, and they’re not going to start now. Theo’s all for getting laid, maybe that _is_ why Liam came out tonight, but he’s got a feeling watching Liam leave the next day will hurt a hell of a lot more than guys using him to get to Brett.

 

“I’m sorry… I have to go…” Idiot. He ignores the surprise on Liam’s face when he pulls the warm hands from his sides and storms off. He hears Liam calling his name, but he doesn’t stop. He sees Josh at the bar and he grabs his beer in passing, ignores his protests too, and then he’s outside. 

 

Theo heads off the far corner outside the club, the little dark corner where the smokers gather and he jumps up on one of the crates, pops open the bottle and takes a big sip.

 

“Hey…” Liam approaches around the corner carefully.

 

Theo sighs but shifts up so Liam can sit down, “Hi…”

 

“I’m sorry about what I said, didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

 

“You didn’t.”

 

“Then why’d you run?”

 

“Why’d you come talk to me in there?”

 

Liam frowns, “What do you do when a hot guy stares at you?”

 

“A hot…” he falters for a moment, clears his throat, “I pretend I don't see them, like any normal person.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Look Liam, you're really nice, and really fucking hot…. And I’m… you’re way out of my league okay? I like my heart, I like it whole and secure in my chest.”

 

“I don’t get it? Why do you say…”

 

“Because I’m fat okay?? You trying to tell me that you hadn’t noticed? You don't look at my belly and go ‘oh gross’ or…”

 

“No??” Liam turns to him, “No, I don't! You wanna know what the first thing was that I noticed about you?”

 

Theo shakes his head, looks down but Liam tips his chin back up, “That you were looking at me.”

 

“Well obviously…”

 

“No, I mean most guys or girls see how short I am and they tap out. They don’t even bother. Or, they see the muscles and assume I’m happy to be hit on or touched. But you… you looked away, so flustered that I caught you…”

 

Theo blushes, he was hoping Liam didn’t notice that part.

 

“Theo, I don’t give a shit what you look like… you’re really fucking pretty, but that’s not why I’m here. You’re sweet, and you’re funny. You made me laugh and not many people can do that… and I want more of it”

 

Theo doesn’t know what else to say, he’s wondering if this guy’s real, “It doesn’t bug you that I’ve got this..” he pinches his little belly roll and wiggles it, “or this?” he pokes a finger into the soft lumps on his hips. “These don’t bug you? When you look like an actual Instagram model?”  

 

Liam laughs, “Well, I have to look like this, it’s my job.”

 

“Oh Jesus you're an Instagram model aren't you??”

 

Now Liam’s blushing, “Not Instagram, just a model. It pays my bills.”

 

“Yup! I’m out!” Theo jumps down the crates and Liam follows and grabs his hand to pull him back.

 

“Please stay? Stay with me and let me kiss you? Please?” Liam steps closer, backing Theo up against the crates, hands on his hips again, face so close Theo can feel Liam’s breath cooling his lips.

 

He’s probably going to regret everything, he’ll probably question his sanity and die in the process, but fuck it, he’ll die happy. He cups Liam’s face, closing the few inches between them and holy shit Liam’s lips are soft, slowly parting, giving way for his tongue.

 

Liam chases Theo’s mouth when he pulls away, eyes still closed and he whines faintly at how the cold night air nips his wet lips, “You kiss like fire Gerry.”

 

Theo snorts, “You’re not too bad yourself.”

 

Liam looks down to where their hips press together and Theo’s hard on strains against his jeans, “Reckon I’m more than okay…”

 

“Shut up.” and he kisses him again. And again and again. And then some.

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

They're sitting at the small breakfast counter, Brett’s munching on his bowl of cereal, Theo's almost done and paging through a men’s health magazine.

 

“So, where’d you disappear to last night huh?” Brett asks, sly smirk pulling at his mouth corners.

 

“Just around the corner.” Theo says and smiles, taking another bite.

 

“With a dude?”

 

Theo laughs, blushes, then nods.

 

“Look at you Raeken! Getting some!” Brett's got a huge grin on his face, like he's genuinely happy for Theo.

 

“I didn’t _get_ anything okay. We kissed. He’s nice.”

 

“Ha. I’m sure.” Brett slurps up the rest of his milk and places his bowl down, “I’m late! Gotta run!” He ruffles Theo’s hair on the way out, “Love you honey!” and then he’s out the door with his green and white Starbucks shirt.

 

“See you later, sweetheart.” Theo yells after him, shakes his head and starts cleaning up. He’s a bit reluctant telling Brett that Liam’s a model, and he really shouldn’t be, it shouldn’t matter. But, he knows there’s a certain amount of stigma attached to that title, even though Liam seems to break all those moulds. Theo knows how overprotective Brett can get, and he’s not up for the talk right now. It’s early, he’s not even sure Liam is really interested or will want to be around once he sees him in clear light.

 

Theo’s dried the bowls and he's getting his bag ready when his phone goes off:

 

**_From: Brett 7:00_ **

_Yo, I left something at the apartment. Take care of it for me please.”_

 

He looks around confused, Brett’s taken all his things, he’s obviously got his phone with him, he’s not usually forgetful so…

 

“Morning.”

 

Theo jumps about a mile, clutches the phone to his chest, and turns to find Josh looking gorgeously dishevelled wrapped in Brett’s bedsheet with nothing else on. Oh… Oh, Brett you motherfucker.

 

“Josh… you’re uh… you’re naked.” He realises then that the two finally hooked up and it fucking stings like heartburn.

 

“Yeah bubs. Why aren’t you? We can have some fun.” He laughs watching Theo sputter and blush, “I’m kidding bubs, don’t hurt yourself. Brett did me over good last night, don’t think I could take another dick right now.”

 

Theo knows he’s visibly grimacing, and while he watches Josh saunter off to the bathroom, dropping the sheets outside, Theo realises that maybe he’s been pining unrequitedly for too long. Maybe it’s time to let go now. Does he honestly want to be in love with a guy who won’t even give him the time of day when a demigod like Liam will?

 

He strides forward and bangs on the door, “Listen, I have to get to work in about twenty minutes... so uh, hurry up.”

 

“Yeah yeah, can I get a ride?”

 

Theo honest to god does not want to give him a ride anywhere, he feels like drop kicking Josh from the second floor of this fucking building, “Sure.” But he will because he’s a decent guy.

 

Instead of staring at the bathroom door wondering what the fuck Josh is doing in there, Theo shoots of a message to his roommate:

 

**_To: Brett 7:15_ **

_I hate you a little._

**_From: Brett 7:16_ **

_Thanks honey! Give him something to eat._

**_To: Brett 7:16_ **

_I think he ate plenty last night._

**_From: Brett 7:16_ **

_Nah, gags too much._

**_To: Brett 7:17_ **

_Weak._

**_From: Brett 7:18_ **

_Ikr!!_

 

Theo’s sure as shit not feeding Josh. He’s really not. He’s not stopping at McDonalds. He’s not ordering a fucking breakfast meal, running five minutes late, he’s _not._ He’s fucking not.

 

_“Thanks for your order! Please pay at the next window!”_

 

Theo turns to glare at Josh who’s grinning dumbly at him, “Thanks bubs!”

 

“Yeah no problem.” _Douche._

 

Josh starts eating in the car, tells Theo he can drop him at the park, that he’ll walk the rest of the way. He’s pretty relieved to be rid of him. Although Theo’s made a clear choice that he doesn’t want to like this asshat anymore, he can’t just turn it off and the smell of Josh, booze and Brett mixed in the confines of his car is too much to bear right now.

 

He gets to the school, parks his car and he’s trying hard not think about the fact that he hasn’t heard from Liam yet. He won’t be surprised at all. Won’t even blame him. He pulls out his phone anyway, finds no messages except the ‘xoxo’ from Brett. His heart sinks a little, but the logical part of his brain tells him the guy’s a model and he probably doesn’t have to be anywhere at 7am in the morning like Theo does, that he’s still asleep.

 

Suddenly, while he’s bounding up the step to his class, the picture he has of Liam in his mind is faint and he’s burning to know what he looks like again. He knows he’s heading down the road to heartache but he can’t help it, Liam’s fucking hot and he seemed to be really interested in him, so he drops his bag on his desk and flips Instagram open.

 

It’s not as much of a search as he thought it would be Liam’s photo pops up fourth from the top, under Liam goddamn Payne… Hemsworth… Neeson. _What the fuck are you doing Theo?_ But he clicks on his page anyway. Nearly has a fucking stroke.

 

There are scanty photos of Liam all over, and holy hell, he’s built. Liam’s ripped and toned and has a bronze tan and he’s wearing the tiniest… what even are those? Boxers? He clicks on the first photo, aware his mouth is hanging open. It’s one of Liam, in this tiny garment, whatever the fuck it is. The curve of his ass bubbles out the back and his thumbs are hooked in the front pulling it down so far you can see the thick neatly kempt happy trail that leads down into it.

 

“Holy fucking…”

 

“Morning Mr. Raeken!” the giddy high-pitched giggles of a group of his students rip him from his thoughts. He realises he's semi hard – thank god for long shirts - and needs to put his phone away fast… one last look. _Jesus._

“Uh. Morning.” The class is filled up… when did the class fill up? He locks his phone and places it down on his desk. He can feel it though, the stupid phone, burning to be picked up and drooled all over. But there are teenagers.

 

“Right. Eyes up.” The girls always giggle when he says that, “What’s the process called by which amino acids are linearly arranged into proteins through the involvement of ribosomal RNA, transfer RNA, messenger RNA, and various enzymes.” 

 

And now they stare stupidly at him.

 

“Photosynthesis” someone yells from the back.

 

“No. Guys, come on. _Protein synthesis._ ”

 

It’s a long period and the kids are being lazy and he’s so relieved when it’s over that he doesn’t have to say the word synthesis anymore. Theo slumps down in his chair just as the last of them leave and grabs his phone. Still nothing from Liam, which hurts a little, and so he does the only logical thing a person can do… he pours vinegar all over the wound by scrolling 20 weeks deep into Liam’s timeline.

 

There’s a selfie of Liam, post workout, in only black shorts sitting on a gym mat… He obviously never skips leg day… or any day. The next one is of him on the cover of a fitness magazine, wearing Pump boxers and sucking on an ice cream, cheeks hollowed and cream dripping down his hand.

 

_Is this real? This can’t be real._

The next one blows him away, because while he knows Liam is pretty, this photo - taken in exactly the right light at the world’s most glorious angle - is pure perfection, “Oh wow…” he zooms in on Liam’s face, he’s wearing clothes and he’s wet - Theo doesn't know why he’s wet, but fuck he’s not complaining, “Whose jaw is this sharp??”

 

Unfortunately, when he closes that photo, the one right next to it is of Liam and another guy. They look… pretty close. And the guy, _Whittemore_JBae according to his tag,_ is fucking gorgeous. Flawless skin, crystal green eyes and a jaw that could rival Liam’s. He’s also got his hand up Liam’s shirt and Liam looks rather… well, horny. He taps out quickly but not before he catches the caption to the photo, _“Love of My Life.”_

 

Well. That fucking hurts. It hurts. And he knows he shouldn’t, he _knows_ it’s his shitty self-esteem, but he can't help but compare. Whittemore-what-the-fuck-ever has not an ounce of fat on him. Theo didn’t have to click on more of his photos to see that. And Theo has a little belly that rolls when he sits down and a double chin from the wrong angle and he hates life right now. He hates it all, and he hates…

 

The phone buzzes in his hand and Liam’s name pops up in his notifications. He squawks at that and tosses the phone back onto his desk just as his new class wanders in. Sarah raises her little blonde eyebrows at him and smirks knowingly.

 

“You should always say yes when that happens Mr. Raeken.”

 

He flushes, probably an unimaginable shade of pink, and sputters for words, “What??”

 

Sarah takes her seat, “Just saying if a girl gets that reaction out of you, you should always say yes to whatever she wants.” and she shrugs.

 

“Ha. Who says it’s a girl?”  _presumptuous_ _little shit._

 

“A boy??” She’s the one blushing now.

 

Theo sighs, “Okay no, this is Biology not Sex Ed. Get your books out.” He motions in the air for them to get moving.

 

“Answer his text first!” someone shouts. And soon the whole class is chanting ‘Answer him!’ over and over.  Theo can’t help but laugh and yell and exasperated ‘okay’ before picking up the phone again- they all go quiet with anticipation.

 

“What!!” he scowls when he looks up and they’re all staring back at him.

 

“What’s he saying??” Sarah chirps from her seat. He’s not sure where this line got crossed but here he is, holding a burning phone in his hand, too scared to read the message from an incredibly pretty boy but so excited he could shoot through the roof at the same time. Liam fucking messaged him. First.

 

Theo taps open the text.

 

**_From: LiamD 11:00_ **

_Hi. It’s the guy from last night. The one who spoke to you at the bar. I followed you out, I was the one who kissed you. So I was wondering if you wanted to come by sometime? Tonight maybe? For dinner? I can cook. Let me know! Would be really nice to see you again. Liam._

 

Theo’s heart is doing about a million different things right now, he’s trembling a little too.

 

“What’s he saying Mr. Raeken??” Sarah repeats, pushy and shrill.

 

“So, he wants me to go to dinner. He’ll cook.” he shrugs, looking at them for answers. _Really Theo?_ They all break out in a chorus of ‘ooohs’ and giggles and then ‘Say yes! Say yes!’

 

**_To: LiamD 11:07_ **

_Hey. Really glad you texted. I’d love to._

 

**_From: LiamD 11:07_ **

_!!! OK. I’ll send my location. 8pm?_

 

**_To: LiamD 11:08_ **

_Sounds good. See you then :)_

 

Shortly after, he receives the text with Liam’s address, he bites his lip and smiles. He’d do a happy dance if it wasn’t for all the students around. Heck, they’d probably join him.

 

“Okay. Enough shenanigans. Page 17. Chimeras. A chimera's a single organism composed of cells with distinct genotypes. In animals, this means an individual derived from two or more zygotes…”

 

He carries on the rest of the lesson with giddy little butterflies in his belly that happen to flutter endlessly at the thought of Liam, despite his brain telling him not to get too excited, that it’s all too good to be true.

 

* * *

 

Theo shows up to Liam’s apartment uptown. Such a typical model apartment, he thinks to himself as the doorman lets him in. Low hanging chandeliers, fine cut marble counters, a fucking reception area with an actual concierge. Theo and Brett’s apartment’s version of a concierge is Mrs. Johnson yelling at them for rent money in her thick jersey accent.- followed by them bailing down the fire escape before she catches them. He should be much skinnier than he is considering all the running away he does, but his fat clings to him like a shadow.

 

“Hi! Welcome to The Yellow Iris. How can I help?”

 

Theo approaches the concierge desk, he’s met with a friendly looking guy busy filing his bright pink nails, blue eyeshadow glittering, and plump red lips, his hair spiked perfectly on his head.

 

“Hey, I’m looking for Liam?”

 

“Of course honey.” The concierge, the name tag says Jaymie, smiles and gives Theo a once over, “You here for the photos?”

 

“Not that I know of. Here for the food.” He smiles while Jaymie dials up Liam’s apartment. He seems so at home in his own skin, Theo thinks, must be great to be at ease with yourself. All while he’s tugging at his shirt again, he wore an extra loose one so he doesn’t have to worry about it accentuating his tummy or love handles. Still... he knows it’s there, and he’s scared of Liam touching him and grossing out. He bets Jaymie doesn’t give a shit.

 

“Leeeee!!!” Jaymie squeals when Liam picks up, “You got someone down here boo-boo, wanna come get him? He’s pretty!!… Aw, so grumpy. So grumpy. I’ll send him up. Kay kay!”

 

He puts the phone down and picks his nail file back up, winks at Theo who’s staring at him with a smile, “Top floor honey.” This time he winks successively and Theo again blushes ruby red before spinning on his heel.

 

“Thank you Jaymie!!”

 

"Sure thang!"

 

He’s standing in the elevator and there are mirrors all over the damn thing, he takes a peek and he looks good, to himself anyway.

 

He’s fluffing his hair, tugging from side to side, smoothing his hands down his freshly shaven jaw, checking his teeth, when the bell rings and the door opens to a smirking Liam leaning against the doorframe.

 

Theo can’t help that his face breaks into a smile when he sees him, and Liam’s smiling too and his piercing blue eyes shimmer and his hair is wet and messy… and _fuck_.

 

Liam greets him with a hug, he smells great too like vanilla and toothpaste. Theo’s fingers curl into Liam’s side, into the soft gray Henley he’s wearing, and under it Theo can feel Liam’s firm abs flex as he reaches up to hug him.

 

“Hey…” Liam smiles into his neck, hands in his hair.

 

Theo almost wants to say, 'I missed you', because it feels that way. He doesn’t know why but now that he’s back with Liam he has a foreign sense of belonging. He’s feels safe. He mutters a soft “Hey” and then Liam leads them back into the apartment.

 

The place looks even better than he imagined, it’s big and open and clean. Sam Smith plays somewhere in the background and something smells amazing- Liam’s already started the food. There's  gorgeous art on the walls but the one that demands attention the most is the massive blown up portrait of Liam. He’s sitting on a simple black stool, his legs wide open with one hand hanging suggestively beside what appears to be a massive bulge in lace boxers. Theo can’t take his eyes off it; the way Liam’s mouth parts and how every single muscle flexes for the shot.

 

“It was for Tyler Shields. A friend of mine. He gave it to me for my birthday.” Liam says and only then Theo looks away and at the real thing.

 

He can’t keep his eyes from dropping to Liam’s lips, he then gives a small smile and leans down. Liam smiles too before Theo connects their lips, tender and gentle and softly, lingering for a few moments before bringing his hands up to Liam’s face and kissing a bit harder until Liam groans quietly gripping his waist tight.

 

“It’s beautiful.” Theo whispers when he pulls away, eyes flicking over Liam’s face, over every pretty corner.

 

Liam smiles, leans in for another peck, Theo’s wants to dive back for more right there but Liam says, “Come sit with me? Dinner’s almost done.” and then leads Theo to the open-plan kitchen. 

 

While they walk Theo admires the broad set of Liam’s shoulders and how soft and comfortable his faded blue jeans look on him, he’s barefoot and looks perfectly domestic. Theo can totally get used to this if Liam will have him. Imagine waking up to a sight like this every day? Heaven.

 

“Come sit here.” Liam pats the counter top and makes a space for Theo but before Theo can move Liam picks him up by his sides and lifts him onto the counter. Theo’s surprised to say the least, Liam’s strong, and he suddenly feels even safer than he did before. “You look really nice.” Liam says pulling Theo down for another kiss.

 

“So do you… I love these tops, can just never wear them. Doesn’t fit right.”

 

Liam busies himself with selecting a few spices, “They’re my favourite. I’d love to see you in one. Maybe one of mine…”

 

Theo’s hearts probably stuck in his throat because he can’t speak, only smile. Liam is so fucking hot, and he seems super into him, wants him to wear his clothes – not that they’ll fit –  Theo still wonders when the camera crew will jump out and tell him it’s all a joke. _Boy’s like Liam don’t…_

 

“How was your day? What’d you do?”  Liam asks over his shoulder, stirring whatever’s in the pot.

 

“The usual, had classes. The kids made me do half the lesson in Italian, kept giggling through it so that wasn't very productive.”

 

“Oh yeah! You said four languages right!?”  

 

Theo nods, looks down.

 

“Say something in one of them! I wanna hear it!”

 

“Nah it's embarrassing.” Theo chuckles and looks away.

 

“Oh come on. I won't laugh. Say something.” Liam’s bright blue eyes are piercing into him and his skin heats up underneath.  

 

“Yeah okay fine!” he gives Liam a playful glare, clears his throat, “Uh, sono contento che tu mi abbia invitato.” and then he turns a proper shade of red.  
  


Liam turns and blinks, his mouth parts… he blinks some more, “Yeah. Okay sure!”

 

Theo's laughing, he looks adorable when he's confused. It's not fair that Liam gets to be so hot and so innocent looking at the same time.

 

“I mean, I got the ‘uh’ at the beginning… that translates to ‘uh’ right?”

 

That rips a cackle from Theo's throat, “Good job!” he teases.

 

“See. Models can be smart too. Go me!”

 

“You're a real dork, huh?”

 

“Excuse me, Mr. Bio teacher who speaks all the foreign. You just need glasses and bunny teeth and you're the embodiment of dorky.”

 

“Stop making me laugh!! I'm trying to look cool! Tell me what you did today.”

 

Liam snorts, “I had two photo shoots this morning, right. One for a new range of fucking jockstraps and the other for a sports catalogue. Both at a school, different schools but on the sports field.”

 

“Oh boy…” Theo grinned, sticking his hands under his thighs, legs dangling.

 

Liam grins, blowing on a spoon full of sauce, “Guess you know where this is going, huh?”

 

“You showed up at the wrong shoot with the wrong outfit?”

 

Liam brings the spoon over so Theo can taste, and he nods in approval, “Not me, I was a hundred percent correct. But the crew fucked up and put me in the jockstrap at the elementary school just as the softball team came out for a game.”

 

“Oh my god…”

 

“Yep. My ass was out in front of a bunch of five-year-olds!”

 

Theo barks out a laugh, folding over.

 

“Hey! Don’t laugh at me! I was horrified! So were their moms… Theo! Stop laughing!!” But Theo’s shoulders are shaking and Liam’s laughing too and he looks really fucking amazing doing it. He’s suddenly close to Theo, hands on his thighs, and while Theo’s self-conscious about the way they spread when he sits, Liam seems to think they’re amazing because he’s rubbing up and down them, biting down on his lip. And now no one’s laughing anymore.

 

Liam pushes up a bit, tongue teasing at Theo’s lips and Theo lets him in. This kiss is different though, it’s breathless and hungry, and then Liam’s pushing up more, closer, and Theo swings his arms around Liam’s shoulders, “Shift back.” Liam mumbles in the most demanding tone Theo’s ever heard.

 

He moves back, and the kiss deepens again, tongues stroking, but now Liam’s climbed up on the bar stool and he’s level with Theo and pushing him back. Then, in classic movie style he swipes the stack of meal prep containers out of the way, sends them flying to the ground and pushes Theo down on the marble.

 

Liam’s breathing fast against his lips and his hands are all over, even on the spots Theo hates, Liam’s admiring them, every single curve. His hands swim over his plump hips, squeezing and he groans at the feel of it, Liam does too. And then Theo feels it, the hard press of Liam’s dick against his thigh, and his eyes shoot up to the crystal blue ones above him.

 

They both stop. Liam’s panting, swallowing hard, “Sorry. Sorry... I just… you’re really fucking hot. I’m sorry.” And he sits up on his knees, pushes his hair back.

 

Theo’s head kind of spins from nearly getting off completely clothed and from Liam calling him hot. That’s new to his ears, “No it’s fine… Me too,” he outlines the print of his own hard erection straining in his jeans while still lying between Liam’s legs, “Got carried away. Sorry.” He didn’t really want to stop but doesn’t want to make Liam do things he doesn’t want to do.

 

“We should probably eat this food.” Liam says with a shy smile and he backs off the counter, adjusting his jeans in the front. Theo shifts back to the edge and jumps off, also pulls his jeans so they don’t press uncomfortably into this dick. Liam watches the movement with rapt attention, almost doesn’t drag his eyes away. Theo knows then what it feels like to melt under someone’s gaze, and he realises he'll probably do just about anything this boy asks him to.

 

Liam strides forward, takes Theo’s face in his hands and kisses him hard, doesn’t say anything, but it looks like he wants to. The moment’s all too intense and everything is hot between them, in the kitchen in his chest and he needs to breathe but he can’t, “Let’s eat then…” he swallows.

 

They sit down for dinner, it’s great - Liam’s a fantastic cook - their knees press under the table. “Who’s that?” Theo asks looking at a framed picture of Whittemore_JBae on Liam’s fireplace, knowing full well who it is, but he's curious anyway.

 

“Oh, uh, that… that shouldn’t be there anymore.” Liam gets up and drops the photo into a small trash can. “Sorry. I just don't go in there often, didn’t realise…”

 

“It’s okay… you don’t need to apologise for having a past. We all do.”

 

Liam sits back down and smiles, “Wish we didn’t sometimes.”

 

Theo senses something in his voice that sounds a lot like hurt, and he doesn’t like it one bit. He squeezes Liam’s leg under the table, “You okay?”

 

“How could I not be? Have you seen the hot guy sitting next to me?”

 

"No where?" and he smiles while taking the last bite of his food. 

 

 

Liam speaks quietly next to him, slotting his hand into Theo’s, “You’re unbelievably beautiful Theo, Everywhere...” and when Theo looks down, obvious disbelief in the way he scoffs, Liam adds, “I wish you could see yourself the way I do.”

 

He wants to believe it, especially the way Liam says it. But so many voices have told him otherwise, _“You’d be so hot if you were skinny.” – “We don’t carry your size.” - “Such a pity, you’ve got a cute face though.” - “Should you be eating that?”_ It’s hard to believe one that suddenly says otherwise.

 

“You said you don’t go in there often…” Theo nods to the huge sitting area beside them. The couches are really big and looks really comfy and in general seems like it could be an amazing place to relax.

 

“It’s a big room… just makes you feel really lonely when you’re by yourself.”

 

“Well… maybe now?”

 

Liam smiles at him, “Definitely now.”

 

 _Maybe always,_ Theo thinks, but he doesn’t say it.

 

They end up on the big couch after dinner and Liam’s set up his laptop- not that they’re paying attention because Liam’s lips are on him again, but it’s soft and slow and thier dicks aren't hard, maybe semi, but it’s not about that. 

 

Liam’s kissing him so carefully, so gently, taking his time on his lips like he's trying to memorize the taste. He’s on top of Theo, his eyes are closed, lips tracing the outline of Theo’s mouth, “You’re something special, aren't you?” Liam whispers, his hand on the side of Theo’s face and thumb stroking along his cheekbone.

 

“Not really, no,” Theo whispers back.

 

“No one’s ever kissed me like this before.” Liam says dragging his finger down Theo’s lips, like he’s searching for something and the answer is right there.

 

“Well, no one’s ever looked at me like this before.”

 

“Good.” Liam shifts up so he settles properly on top of Theo, between his legs, fully clothed- but it's somehow more intimate than anything Theo’s ever experienced before, “More for me. And I’ll never get enough” Liam murmers against Theo's mouth.

 

Later Liam falls asleep cuddled into Theo’s side, hand resting on his hip, mumbles sleepily as his body relaxes against Theo’s, “Please stay.” his fingers curl into Theo’s shirt.

 

Theo kisses his forehead, “I’ll stay.” He wouldn't leave even if everything around him was on fire.

 

* * *

 

When Theo fell asleep the night before, the last thing he saw was the huge portrait of Liam on the wall, the beautiful boy that held him so right and made him smile and feel special. It felt senseless closing his eyes to dream when reality looked this good but he did anyway. 

 

 

Earlier that morning Liam walked him down to the lobby and kissed him goodbye, thanked him for a good time and promised to call soon- Even tried to bribe him into staying for the day and had it not been for work he would have.

 

Now though, now he wishes he never went. He wishes he could erase everything, every touch every glance. Because now the sweet taste of Liam on his lips is bitter while he’s staring through the Starbucks window where Brett works.

 

Brett’s laughing, blushing even, while Liam’s standing in front of him at the coffee counter. He can tell Liam’s laughing too - and that’s fine - people laugh, but the kill shot happens when Liam reaches in his pocket, takes Brett’s pen and scribbles something down before sliding it to Brett. Brett looks astonished for a moment, rubs the back of his neck then nods when Liam says something again.

 

Theo turns quickly and walks away before Liam sees him. He can’t see where he’s going. His eyes are flooding with tears and he doesn’t even care who sees, he’s full on crying, hands shoved down deep in his pockets because his heart is on fire, it burns in his chest. If he had claws, he’d rip it out to stop the pain.

 

Of course this would happen. Liam’s exactly Brett’s type. To the T. And Brett, well he’s irresistible even on a bad day, and then there’s Theo with thick thighs and love handles and… and Liam smiled at Brett… he gave Brett his number and he made Brett blush like he makes Theo blush.

 

He blames himself though. He should have known better. ‘ _Boy’s like Liam don’t kiss boys like Theo’,_ his broken heart tells him.

 

He should have known. 


	3. Chapter 3

Theo’s eyes are swollen and red when gets home that night, he stayed out longer than he needed to, to avoid going home and he teared up almost every moment he was left alone. The last person he wants to see is Brett but there’s no place else for him to go but home.

 

And he knows, he fucking knows he shouldn't be mad at Brett, Brett doesn’t know who Liam is. But he _is_ mad, because it hurts, because he wishes, selfishly, that Brett can just for once say no. Just fucking say no and send the guy packing. But he never does, Brett takes it all, because he can. And deep down Theo knows Brett will never hurt him, that Brett loves him, but Josh hurt too. And yes, maybe Theo should have opened his trap and told Brett that he was in love with Josh, but how dumb would he have looked?

 

So he stands with his hand hovering on the doorknob, not sure how he’s supposed to act now. Does he tell Brett, does he shut up? Theo’s never been great with hiding his emotions and Brett’s been his roommate for years, he’ll know within five minutes that something’s off.

 

Brett’s head flings around when Theo enters, “Hey! Where were you? I got worried.” he’s making sandwiches, there’s juice for Theo on the counter.

 

“Marked up some papers after class,” he lies, and it makes him nauseous. He drops his backpack, emptiness seeping into his veins where his blood pumped excitedly only twelve hours ago.

 

“Your phones off?”

 

“Died.” Another lie. He switched it off, doesn’t even know if Liam called him. He’s studying Brett’s face for any sign that he’s mistaken, he doesn’t find anything, Brett seems blissfully unaware and gorgeous. Theo has to swallow down a lump when he speaks, “What you get up to today…. Meet any new people.”

 

Bret frowns, but smiles, flipping the sandwich onto a plate for Theo, “That’s… oddly specific? But yeah, I did, kind of.”

 

Right then Brett’s phone buzzes on the counter and he grabs it immediately. Theo’s heart cracks wide open when Brett smiles at the screen and types a message back. But Theo doesn’t know how to stop when it hurts, not until he’s totally submerged in it, his lip trembles and he asks, “That him?”

 

Stars dance in Brett’s eyes when he looks up at Theo, “Yeah! We’ve been texting, exchanging pics. He’s freaking about my eight pack… it’s such a weird story dude you gotta…”

 

Theo’s beyond the point of return. He pictures Liam looking at Brett’s body like that, he pictures Liam’s hands on him the night before, then how Brett’s firm lines and lean limbs would feel better under Liam’s palms—much better than his wobbly bits -, how the two would look moving together. Muscles and firm skin.   _It’s not Brett’s fault, it’s not his fault. It’s not…_

 

The phone buzzes again, and Brett grins again. Theo shoves the sandwich away and shoots up, the chair dropping behind him, he turns on his heel and storms off to his room. Like a fucking child.

 

“Theo??” Brett’s at his door knocking softly, “You okay?”

 

“Just…. Leave me alone!!” He can’t help that he lashes out, he’s so hurt, so angry, shaking. His cheeks are hot and wet with tears that refuse to seize. Along with the heartbreak he feels dumb and used and gullible. Naïve.

 

He realises then how fast you can actually fall for someone. How just their smile and the way they treat you can be enough. All it takes is that one person to look at you like you’re a mountain of gold. That same person can implode your entire world too.

 

Brett stops knocking and begging, leaves with a grumbled ‘fine’, and right now that’s a good thing, Theo can’t stand to look at him now, just grateful he didn’t invite Liam over here tonight. He drops down on his bed, body shivering, he can barely get his phone switched on.

 

It comes to life eventually with Liam’s name popping up repeatedly.

 

**_From: LiamD 7:40_ **

_I wish you stayed._

**_From: LiamD 8:39_ **

_I’m being weird but when can I see you again?_

**_From: LiamD 11:01_ **

_Hope you’re okay?_

**_From: LiamD 15:00_ **

_Is something wrong? Was it me? Too much too soon?_

**_From: LiamD 17:22_ **

_Okay, well… I really had a good time last night Theo. Hoping we can do that again? Guess your phone died. Drop me a text when you can._

He burns to shoot off something bitchy, to tell Liam how hurt he is, how fucking stupid he feels for even thinking something like this could work. Instead, he blocks Liam’s number and shoves the phone under his pillow, pulling the covers up to his face.

 

He tries to forget the things Liam said to him the night before, _“You’re beautiful.”—“No one’s ever kissed me like this before.”_ How Liam looked at him when he laughed, their bodies pressed together, warm and safe and right. He tries not to think that he fell asleep with this boy and that the last thing his lips touched were Liam’s. He tries but all he can think is… _I bet you’re like this with all the boys._

 

* * *

 

He’s been sulking for four days. Ignoring Brett for four days. Brett’s not the type to kiss ass so he plays the game with Theo, gives him pointed glares when he comes home and shoots straight for his room. Brett’s not going to say anything first, and he shouldn’t have to, he didn’t do anything wrong. Technically.

 

It’s Saturday evening when Theo finally gets bored of his room and shuffles into the living area. Brett’s on the couch smiling at his phone and Theo’s stomach churns at that, thinking it’s probably Liam on the other end.

 

Brett’s head jerks up to Theo when he stops beside the couch, raises his eyebrows, and if he was actually speaking to Theo, he’d ask him if he’s just going to stand there, so Theo sits down as far off to the side as he can. They’d usually lay with their feet resting on the other’s lap but things are tense since Theo’s little tantrum and he doesn’t know how to say, ‘you’ve stolen the guy I like’ so he shuts up and takes the remote. He looks for anything that’s not couple-like or romantic, because honestly, he’s about two seconds away from tears at any given time.

 

“So you’re gonna sit there and pretend I’m not here? Not gonna tell me what crawled up your ass??”

 

Theo sighs, “Had a bad day.”

 

“Well, did I cause your bad day?”

 

Theo wants to say yes, he wants to tell him what happened, but Brett's annoyed, and hurt, Brett’s voice pitches when he’s hurt. Theo hates that. He hates hurting people. Funny that people don’t give a shit about hurting him.

 

So he avoids an answer, “I’m sorry.”

 

Brett leaves it at that, he doesn’t look impressed at all, or like he’s forgiven him. He looks back at his phone, smiles at an incoming text.

 

“That the guy from the other day?” Theo doesn’t know why he’s asking that, maybe he’s a sucker for pain, maybe it’s punishment for being so stupid.

 

Brett looks at him then smiles and nods. He looks smitten and soft about it and as much as Theo’s heart aches he knows his friend deserves to be happy too. That he didn’t know, he also just followed his heart.

 

“Nice.” Theo mumbles, forcing a grin.

 

“Hope you don’t mind, he’s coming over for the 9pm movie.”

 

And then Theo’s world drops from under his feet and his head spins.

 

“He’s on his way now… told him to bring an extra milkshake in case you decided to uncoil from your lair.”

 

“He’s what?”  His head feels like a flash grenade went off between his ears, and his heart’s racing to deal with the madness.

 

“Uh, he’s… coming over… are you… you look a bit pale buddy. You okay?” Brett’s putting his phone down, pushing up slowly, “Theo?”

 

Theo gets up, sways to the side, dropping the remote, and he’s holding onto the couch to keep steady. Liam’s coming over here… actually, he’s here right now because through the chaos ringing in his ears he hears the doorbell buzz. _Oh god…_

 

“Coming!” Brett yells to the door but he’s gripping Theo’s shoulders, “Hey, look at me, are you fine? What’s going on?” When Theo stares at the door, Brett leans down a little, getting level with him, “Hey buddy, take a breath. Deep… That’s it… Again.”

 

Reality comes back, things sound normal again, Brett’s not a blur, “Sorry…”

 

“You good?” Brett lets him go to get the door but keeps a concerned eye on Theo where he’s fixed to the spot, his hand gripping the back of the couch. Theo nods, “I’m fine.” But he’s shaking, and he wants to run away but he can’t move.

 

Brett’s huge body blocks his view, so all Theo can see is Brett leaning down to kiss Liam… he has to lean down quite a bit—Brett likes them short, like Liam—then he steps aside to let him in, and fuck Theo’s not ready, he doesn’t want to see Liam and Liam’s fucking blue eyes and deal with this awkwardness right now….

 

“Hi…”

 

Theo’s jaw drops. That’s not Liam. That’s not Liam at all. There’s a slim black dude with a friendly smile and gorgeous eyes standing in his lounge with three milkshakes, but it’s not fucking Liam.

 

Brett’s still looking at him funny, so is the other guy, “Uh, this is Mason…” he says carefully like Theo might explode, moving to stand behind the new guy. _It’s not Liam._

“Mason…” Theo test the word like it’s a lie.

 

“Yeah… The guy I met…”

 

“But that was Liam…”

 

Brett’s taken aback, “What?? How do you…”

 

Theo points to the guy who honestly looks a little scared now. Theo doesn’t blame him, “He’s not Liam…”

 

“No…” Brett speaks slowly again, probably thinking Theo's about to have another tantrum, “this is Mason…”

 

“Liam’s my friend, he gave Brett my number.” Mason chips in and sets the milkshakes down, “He knows I like stupidly tall dudes.” Then he smiles at Brett.

 

The realisation hits Theo like a truck, “Liam didn't hit on you?” he asks Brett, notices he’s sweating.

 

Brett’s face flushes a light pink, “Well, I tried… he said he’s not available but his friend… wait, is _that_ why you freaked the fuck out?? You know Liam…”

 

“Ah fuck!! Fuck! Shit!” Theo turns and grabs his keys, darts by Brett and Mason, doesn’t even shut the door behind him.

 

“How do you know Liam!!??” Brett yells after him but he’s got no time to explain. He needs to fix this mess. Part of his heart is screaming with joy that Liam’s not a douche bag, that he didn’t fuck Theo around but the other part of it scolds himself for letting his insecurities and self-doubt get the better of him.

 

Liam must think he’s such a tool, not replying and blocking his number after they spend a night together. What in the actual fuck is wrong with him? He’s not even sure why he’s rushing off to Liam’s apartment, if he was Liam he’d shut the door in Theo’s face, wouldn’t even listen to his piece of shit explanation. _I’m fat and insecure and a huge idiot._ Because that’s all he’s got.

 

Theo skids into a parking spot, skew, and just about tumbles out the door. Lucky for him the glass doors of Liam’s complex are open and he barrels inside. His converse screech on the smooth marble tiles as he comes to a stop in front of Jaymie, the concierge.

 

“Haaay boo!” He smiles brightly at Theo, then looks a little concerned at the rate of Theo’s breathing. God, he needs to get to a gym or something, he’s so unfit.

 

“Hi. Liam…. Is he…” he sucks in a deep breath, ignoring Jaymie’s perfect eyebrows shooting up.

 

“Oh, No.”

 

“No?”

 

“He’s gone.”

 

“He’s gone??” well that sound about right, Theo thinks, naturally the only hot guy who was ever into him would run away.

 

“Oh honey, I just mean for the week. He’s in Thailand… for a shoot. Didn’t he tell you?”

 

Theo groans, “No. Because I was being a little bitch.” He sighs, talking more to himself now, “Fuck, I’m so dumb.” The tears kind of just flow after that, and he’s going red seeing Jaymie’s look of concern.

 

“Honey? Hey…”

 

He storms out. He’s been doing a lot of that lately. Got him nowhere, and when he gets outside his legs won’t go any further and this all-over miserable feeling sets into his bones, so he sinks down on the sidewalk, pulling his knees up to his chest.

 

Jaymie’s high heels come to stand beside him, a beautiful bright yellow, in contrast to how gloomy everything else looks right now. He looks up, takes in Jaymie’s immaculate attire, black leather tights and a long black dress shirt, through bleary eyes. And the yellow heels.

 

“What happened boo? Y’all have a fight?” he asks softly,

 

Theo laughs, because a fight would have been easier to explain than low self-esteem, “No.” he sniffs, “saw him talking to a guy, looked like flirting… it wasn’t. He was hooking my roommate up with his buddy.”

 

“What’d you do?”

 

Theo tries to keep his jaw from wobbling, but he just feels so fucking horrible and alone, “Blocked him. Ignored him.”

 

“Ooh damn…”

 

“Yeah, I fucked up huh… wasted everyone's time.” Theo scoffs, at himself mostly, but also at everything and everyone else. Everyone who’s happy when his heart is dying by his own hands.

 

Jaymie, in the sky-high stilettos, squats down beside him, “Listen boo-boo.” his voice has gone a bit deeper now, more serious, and he rests his palm on Theo’s forearm, “Love’s never a waste of time. You either love someone completely or you get your ass scalded and learn not to do it again. What happened here was...”

 

“My fault.”  Theo makes it easy for him although Jaymie’s probably never been one to bite his tongue.

 

“Sure was honey. And why’s that, hmm?”

 

“Liam’s hot and I’m…”

 

“You’re insecure ‘coz you got a little pooch? Because you think a boy like that can’t love an atrocity like you? Tell me... Did he pop a bone when you were here the other night?”

 

“What?” for a second the tears stop falling and Theo feels like laughing.

 

“Jesus boo-boo, you a virg too?? Did his dick get hard at any point during your escapades??”

 

“No…. I mean I’m not a virgin but yeah we both did… we got hard.” He blushes, looks away, not sure where this is going.

 

“So, see honey, your problem is here,” he pokes Theo’s temple lightly, “Lee don’t look at boys the way he looks at you. Not even that snek Jackson, and he be looking at him for two years.”

 

Jackson. The guy who held Liam’s heart before… before Theo even had a chance to. He knows things went wrong, in a really horrible way, but he’s not sure how. He just wanted to be the person Liam could feel better with, he wanted to be the one who made Liam want to live in all the rooms of his apartment again, with Theo, holding Theo.  

 

“You wouldn’t let him just love you the way you are. You decided _for_ him you ain’t good enough.”

 

“You’re not making me feel better.”

 

“I ain’t your mama honey. I'm telling you the goddamn truth.”

 

“How do you know these things anyway??” Theo’s surprised his voice is still somewhat coherent.

 

Jaymie falls down on his butt, shoves Theo until there’s enough space for him on the sidewalk too. Theo’s sure they look like a couple of crack whores now.

 

“That night you came over… I saw you squeezing ya little belly in the elevator. There's a camera. And you kept tugging at that big ass shirt baby, like you was hiding.” Theo sniffs, makes a futile attempt to dry off the tears.

 

“Guy’s like that never speak to me, hell, they don’t even look my way. It’s hard you know, being like this, it’s hard loving yourself but hearing people tell you not to. Like, I’m constantly conflicted man, so when this gorgeous dude comes up to me in a club and he kisses me and takes my number and actually fucking calls…”

 

“You don’t know what the fuck to do with your chubby ass, huh?”

 

Theo shakes his head. Jaymie digs around his back pocket, takes out a box of smokes. He offers Theo one, but he declines, “Look,” and he lights it up, takes a deep drag, speaking as he exhales the smoke, “Lee’s different. Since…”

 

“Since?”

 

“Since Jackson. He’s soft. He’s always been soft, but the night Jackson left… Lee had this look…. Like the world defeated him ya know… like he ain’t ever gonna be happy again…”

 

“What happened with them?” Theo wonders why Jackson would have left at night, sounds a bit odd.

 

“Honey, it ain’t my place to say. Lee can tell you that if he wants to. The point is, about a week ago that blue eyed little shit came waltzing in here after midnight with that gay as fuck look on his face, fucking smiling for the first time in I don’t even know how long.” Jaymie takes another long drag and Theo’s eyes set on him, just hearing about Liam makes his heart incredibly happy even when he’s racking back sobs. And also, watching and listening to Jaymie go off is sort of mesmerizing.

 

“But that night,” Jaymie carries on, “that night he grinned at me, looking kinda drunk but not from the liquor ya know. Just happy drunk, and he said,” Jaymie pauses, takes a drag and looks at Theo, “you know what he said?”

 

Theo sighs, “What’d he say?”

 

“He said, ‘I met a boy Jay! A real pretty one and he’s smart too’ Gwad, he kept yappin’ about how you speak all these languages and you a teacher or some shit, I wasn’t listening properly. But the point is boo-boo, that boy fell so goddamn hard. He’s so into you. _You_ put that look on his face.”

 

“Fuck.”

 

“Yeah, and not once did he go, ‘Oh, but he got a bit of belly, some love handles…’ No. That’s all you.”

 

Theo tips his head back against the building that smoke sounds pretty good now. How could he have been such an idiot? Why’s it so hard for him to believe that someone could fall so head over heels in love with him the way Liam apparently has? God, and now it’s all one big mess, it’s all over before anything even started. He so desperately just wanted to run into Liam’s arms and tell him how sorry he is, explain the whole mess, or maybe have Jaymie do it, it sounds much less grim coming from his colourful mouth.

 

But now he’s sitting on the sidewalk in front of The Yellow Iris, trying his very best to remember every inch of Liam’s face when all he’s been trying to do is forget it. And even when Liam comes back in a week who’s to say he’ll want anything to do with Theo. He’s been hurt before, obviously, and here Theo comes along doing it again.

 

“What do I do now Jay… How do I fix this?” he asks just as Jaymie kills the smoke and gets up. He’s pretty fucking agile for a dude in stilettos. Jaymie holds his hand out for Theo and helps him up.

 

“You start where you can. Look, I gotta run Keisha ‘gon have a stroke. Meet me in the park tomorrow morning for coffee? I’ll help you get that silly head straight kay?” and he leans in and kisses Theo’s forehead then spins around, “Bye boo!”

 

“See you…”

 

 _‘Start where you can.’_ He can’t do anything about Liam right now, he can’t even reach him so he’s not going to drive himself nuts with messages that won’t get a reply. What he can do now, is apologize to Brett for being a tool and to Mason for not even greeting, explain this shit show, and hope that whatever Liam’s doing, he hasn’t given up on Theo completely. 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Implied non consensual intentions toward the end. Please read carefully.

Theo emerges from his bedroom Sunday morning, exhausted from tossing and turning all night. It’s quiet and Brett’s still asleep so he moves around carefully not to wake him. He’s still trying to get the words right in his head, doesn't quite know what to say to Brett, how to apologise for being a gigantic dick. Although he knows Brett has a soft spot for him and has probably forgiven him already, it doesn't excuse his behaviour, however, and he wants to make it up to his friend.

 

He pours a cup of coffee and gets a mug out for Brett too, just then Brett’s door clicks open and he sneaks out on his tippy toes shutting it softly again. He’s wearing only his boxers and Theo smiles, he knows that means Mason stayed the night and got lucky. They were surprisingly quiet, Theo thinks, compared to how he usually has to cover his ears when Brett has someone over.

 

“Morning”

 

Brett jumps when he hears Theo behind him, smiles shyly like he got caught doing something wrong, “Hi.” he whispers, coming to sit next to Theo, “Mase is still asleep.”

 

“Yeah, you like to let them sleep and have me kick them out huh.” Theo grins and takes a sip of coffee.

 

“This one’s different I think. He’s making me soft.”

 

“You  _ are _ soft Bread. That’s why I call you Bread.” Theo teases and bumps his shoulder into Brett’s.

 

“Shh… don’t tell the boys that. Gotta act hard you know, so my little heart doesn’t get broken.” he takes Theo’s cup and gulps down his last bit of coffee, earns him a glare, “Stop, don’t look at me like that. Rather tell me what exactly the fuck happened to you last week, last night. What made you all douchey?”

 

Theo leans back and grabs Brett’s mug and the coffee pot, pours them each a fresh cup. He wishes it was something ten times stronger than coffee and with the potential to knock him out until Liam comes back in a few days so he wouldn’t have to deal with his agonizing thoughts until then. But that’s not right or fair or healthy, so instead he inhales deeply, exhales and then turns to Brett.

 

“Liam was the guy from the club.”

 

Brett’s eyes grow wide, he’s about to take a sip but he lowers the cup, “The one you kissed??”

 

“Yeah. We kissed. He asked me out.” he knows Brett must think ‘why’. To be honest, Theo is still asking himself that exact question - he probably always will - but that’s not the point.

 

“So how’d we get from hot guy snogging you in a club to you not talking to me?”

 

Theo blushes, “I’d just left his place after spending the night… we didn't fuck or anything, just… I slept over, he made me feel nice, special…”

 

Brett takes another sip, “Well, good… because you are.” his eyes are still void of understanding and it’s clear he’s still got no fucking clue how Theo stopped talking to him. He’s to Zen for drama, and well, drama clings to Theo like his skin.

 

“I was on my way to work and… I saw you talking to him at Starbucks… you did that thing you do when a hot boy approaches you, when he catches you off guard.”

 

“I don’t do a  _ thing _ …”

 

“Yeah Bready, you do. Anyway, that happened and I saw him give you his number, or I  _ thought _ it was his number,  I didn’t know…”

 

“Oh bud…”

 

“I’m so sorry... I didn't know. Brett, I acted like a fucking idiot, I was so angry... I just… guys like Liam…” The stops talking, swallows hard, feels his throat constrict, “I fell hard Brett… and now he’s gone.”

 

Brett pulls Theo into a hug, his warm skin and long arms around Theo are comforting, “I’d never do that to you buddy. I’d never hurt you. I didn't know who Liam was.” he smooths over Theo’s hair, and Theo can’t help it, he cries. He should have spoken to Brett first, shouldn't have let his emotions control what he did. But it’s so easy to act out in the moment and not give a shit about how you make people feel, especially the ones who love you most.

 

“Liam shot me straight down you know. He didn't even flirt back,” He’s still holding Theo, taking a sip of coffee, “I felt a bit stupid to be honest, the guy’s hot, and I’m…”

 

“Not used to hearing no?” Theo pulls away, wiping down his eyes.

 

“Yeah,” Brett sighs, “exactly. Listen bud, I’m sure you can fix this. If he blows you off after one misunderstanding, he wasn't worth it to begin with.”

 

“He’s so worth it Brett. You don’t get it… when I was with him, I just, I felt whole. I felt okay.”

 

“Oh, I think I know the feeling…” Brett smiles suddenly, looking over Theo’s shoulder and when he turns to look he sees Mason peek out of the bedroom door, waving an awkward hello. Theo watches in amazement as their eyes lock and their faces break out in a smile. Brett slithers over to Mason, wraps his whole body around him and Mason’s hands come up around his waist. He’s never seen Brett do that, never seen him quite so content and smiley.

 

As sweet as it is, it burns his heart knowing he might lose his chance at something like this.

 

“Mason,” Theo speaks quietly, “I think I owe you an apology too, I acted real crazy last night.”

 

“Hey dude, it’s okay. Don’t stress.” he smiles back at Theo, lifting some weight off his shoulders.  

 

Brett buries himself back in Mason’s neck and Theo thinks this is probably a great time to get going. Jaymie must be waiting for him already. He slips out the door just as Brett lifts Mason off the ground and pins him to the wall. Theo smiles. He’s kind of looking forward to the day Brett has to excuse himself from their flat because Theo’s the one getting down with a hot guy.

 

* * *

 

So Jaymie’s not waiting, he's late. Theo doesn’t mind, he takes the time to just breathe, something he hasn’t done much of since meeting Liam. The guy left him breathless since he laid eyes on him, and Theo’s trying to  remember what his smile looks like and the exact colour of his eyes, how strong Liam’s arms felt around him. But it’s all faded too fast, before he really had a chance to appreciate any of it, before he got to know Liam.

 

“Boo-Boo!”

 

Theo’s head jerks up, sees Jaymie running toward him in shiny pink biker shorts and a white t-shirt knotted at the side exposing a strip of stomach. Theo can’t help but smile.

 

Jaymie reaches him, huffing and out of breath, sweating even, “Whoo jeez boo, how are you baby?  You been waiting long??”

 

Theo eyes the theatrics as Jaymie tries to regain his breath, fanning himself with one hand. Jaymie’s one of those people who can put you in a superb mood by just being around him, he’s genuine and caring and a little bitchy but it’s all real beyond compare, and Theo needs real, “Couple of minutes but it’s fine. You okay?”

 

Jaymie takes a long sip from the water bottle he’s holding, he swallows, “Yeah, yeah come on, wanna show you something.” And then he starts jogging again, sprinting actually.

 

Theo starts after him with a brisk pace, not quite running but not walking either. He's sure he looks really stupid right now.

 

“The fuck Jaymie… why are you running??”

 

“This my morning jog boo, I ain't done yet. You coming?”

 

“I don’t run! Jaymie!!”

 

“Well then you ain’t gonna hear what I’m saying.” Jaymie makes it look completely effortless, his long legs just move gracefully, nothing jiggles when he runs. The pink shorts help too. “Come on honey, run. Pop that pussy.”

 

“What???” Theo finally catches up, his jeans are chafing and his converse hurt like a bitch but he’s running beside Jaymie now, although he’s sure the guy has slowed down somewhat.

 

Jaymie smiles, “Lesson one.” He takes a swig from the bottle again and passes it to Theo, “There’s always gonna be people who think you’re a piece of shit. They ‘gon think you ugly or fat or stupid, but that ain’t your business.”

 

Theo takes a sip, promptly realises it’s not water, “This… is… coffee.” He sputters and hands the bottle back to Jaymie, chest burning and a light sweat breaking out on his forehead, everywhere.

 

Jaymie pays him no mind, “You see that prude little bitch over there with her lips pulled taut, like a little asshole,” he mimics the woman’s expression… “she thinks I’m weird, with my pink shorts and crop top, she’s been glaring at me all morning. Does it look like I give a shit honey? The answer’s no.”

 

Jesus, Jaymie talks a lot while he’s running and Theo can barely breathe. He’s talking sense in his own glittery way and Theo gets what he’s trying to say, but he can’t focus on all these things at once, because Liam still occupies most of the space in his mind but he knows that’s not the point of this exercise and Jaymie’s getting at something much bigger than the fact that he’s fallen in love with a model.

 

“Point??” Theo heaves breathless, impressed that he’s actually keeping up and hasn’t died yet.

 

Jaymie takes a turn and heads off toward a bagel stall, “My point is honey, the fact that she thinks I’m a poof or a weirdo or whatever she wanna call it, that don’t change who Jaymie is. And I’ll probably never see her again in my life so why would I let her bitchy little glares affect how I feel about myself?”

 

They finally come to a halt in front of the bagel stall. Theo stands off to the side, hands on his knees, while he evens out his breathing listening to Jaymie place two orders for them.

 

“Holy shit baby, you a mess. Come on.” And he leads them to a little bench right next to the water, under a huge old willow.

 

“So I get it. I’m not supposed to let people do this to me. Make me feel insecure. But…”

 

“No. People can’t make you feel insecure, you do that by yourself.”

 

“Yeah, okay, but that’s easy for you to say. Look at you.” He motions down to Jaymie’s thin frame, “There’s nothing to worry about here.”

 

“Baby, fat ain’t the worst thing you can be okay? Why don’t you focus on some of the things you like about yourself, about your body?” He takes a big bite, “c’mon, tell me what’s good.” His mouth is stuffed, and he looks kind of adorable, less threatening.

 

Theo thinks about it, he tries really hard, still nothing comes to mind. He's conditioned to think there isn’t anything good, and if you’re fat, that’s all there is to you. That's how you're defined. But he remembers how Liam stroked up and down his thighs that night, how he bit down on his lip watching his hand move over them. Theo’s got naturally muscular thighs, thick thighs, and he guesses some guys like that, “My thighs… I think they’re pretty nice. Liam liked them.” He says and blushes furiously- probably doesn’t make a difference since he’s still flushed from running.

 

“Ain’t about what Lee liked. You still ‘gon have nice thighs even if Lee wasn’t a factor.” He offers Theo coffee again, and he takes it, “But that’s good. I noticed your thighs too honey, and you’re right. Fills them jeans out real nice.”

 

“Yeah well right now they’re on fire because you made me run.”

 

Jaymie rolls his eyes, chewing and he motions with his hands for Theo to carry on. He stutters a bit, he wasn’t expecting a full body self-appreciation conversation, “Uh, I don’t know…”

 

Then Jamie pokes his arm, mouth still full.

 

“My arms?”

 

Jaymie widens his eyes and nods then winks. Theo never paid much attention to his arms before, kind of nullified them in favour of obsessing over his stomach. 

 

Jaymie swallows, “You got nice big arms boo-boo.”

 

“They’re not muscly, they’re just… big… because I’m fa-”

 

“You say fat I’m gonna slap you.”

 

“It’s true!” Theo laughs.

 

“Well do they become anything less than arms because you ain’t got muscles??”

 

“No…”

 

“No. So you see what I’m saying. You are still a perfect, sweet and smart human being. You're kind and soft and all that good shit. That don’t go away because you’re a little chubs. And the fact that some of these fools can’t see that,” he gestures toward the crowd of people going about their business, “doesn’t make it any less true.”

 

“Liam saw it…”

 

“Lee’s one in a million boo. He’s the type of special you ain’t ever gonna find again.”

 

“That’s why I need to fix this! I need to fix myself. I never wanted to hurt him like this.” Theo looks down, twisting his thumbs around when Jaymie takes his hand.

 

“Boo, you  _ know  _ that and it makes all the difference. You ain’t gonna keep acting like a shit, you know better now. And besides, you ain’t broken, just a little dented.” He smiles warmly, and it’s somehow the most comforted Theo’s ever felt. “So, when you go home, take these clothes off, and just appreciate the good things about yourself honey. Them thighs, your arms, you got nice broad shoulders, pretty eyes, cute lips and you grow a decent stubble. It’s okay to do that, it’s okay to love yourself too.”

 

Theo’s picturing himself standing naked in front of the mirror cringing at what he sees, but maybe he just needs to look a little harder. Maybe he needs to keep looking until he doesn’t just see ugly anymore, look until he sees what Liam does.

 

“Come on baby, take a photo with me.” Jaymie pulls him in close, puts on a huge grin and holds his arm out. Theo’s not ready for the shot, catches him off guard, and the photo comes out with his face halfway to a smile, mouth a little open, “Aw look at us baby. Cutie cute cutes.” And then Jaymie uploads it to Instagram, adding some clever caption that makes him chuckle to himself.

 

Theo glances at the photo, he looks huge and pale next to Jaymie, the guy’s really skinny and his skin is dark and vibrant in contrast to Theo’s, he stands out like a star in the night sky but for the first time Theo sees the photo a little differently. He sees the size difference as a good thing, some guys like bigger men, at least Liam seemed to.

 

“See, you look good boo-boo.” Jaymie flashes the screen to him before pressing post.

 

And he does, his eyes are clear green in the daylight and from this angle his arms and thighs look nice too, he doesn’t really notice his tummy. Maybe that’s how other people, the right people, see him too?

 

“Yeah,” he smiles in agreement, making Jaymie’s head jerk to him, the surprise dancing in his eyes at Theo’s answer, “I do… I look nice there.”

 

Jaymie fumbles for a cigarette, pops it in his mouth and lights up with one hand – because the other's still holding the phone – when suddenly he screeches out loud. Theo jumps beside him.

 

“Oh my lord!!!!!”

 

“What???”

 

Jaymie slaps a hand to his forehead, gasps dramatically, “Boo-boo!! Look!!” the smoke bopping in the corner of his mouth.

 

“What the fuck…” Theo’s trying to calm back down, then he looks at the phone, “Oh… oh holy shit!”

 

The first heart under Jaymie’s picture is made by liam_dunbar09.

 

They share a stupidly happy look on the park bench, their faces breaking out into huge smiles, and Theo can’t help his mind racing. Maybe Liam’s not that mad at him, maybe Liam still thinks he’s pretty, maybe Liam’s trying to contact him or say something with the little red heart. Who knows? The possibilities are maddening. But the big thing, the most important thing is that Liam wouldn’t have liked the photo if there wasn’t still some interest.

 

Theo thinks that’s probably enough to keep him going for the rest of the week… then he’ll get to see Liam again, and by some off-chance Liam will still want to kiss him like he did the other night. Like Theo’s the best thing he’s ever tasted.

 

* * *

 

Liam’s staring at the ceiling of the hotel room, he’s been laying that way for a few hours, passing time before his next shoot. Sleep evades him, intelligible thoughts evade him. And it’s not like that’s what he wants, he wants to think logically and rationally but his mind keeps repeating Theo’s name, his fingertips keep feeling Theo’s skin. His lips still taste him.

 

He can only blame himself though, maybe Jackson was right when he told him how much maintenance he was, Liam guesses he sees it now. The needy texts, the clingy behaviour, he gets it now. Theo needed space to breathe and Liam just smothered him selfishly. And honestly what did he expect with a smart guy like that? But Liam’s so starved for loved, to just be appreciated and seen, that he pushes too hard. He knows this. Still, he can’t help it. He thought he read all the signs right, he thought Theo was into him. But then…

 

Jaymie told him otherwise, he said Jackson was the problem, not Liam. Jaymie saw things clearly for Liam when his own eyes were too clouded with heartache to recognize the truth. Half of his brain believes Jaymie, the other half tells him he drove Jackson away… and now Theo. He hears Jaymie’s voice saying he’s not wrong for wanting to be loved, that he just needs to find the one who’ll love him like that.  He tries to hold on to that.

 

Liam swings his feet off the side of the bed, grabs his phone. He’s stopped himself from trying to reach out to Theo, the texts he sent are overbearing enough. He’s found his Instagram though. Liam just so desperately wants to see Theo’s face again, even if it hurts, even if he’ll never see him again in person.

 

He flips open Theo’s profile, stares at the screen and he feels like hugging it close to his chest, like maybe by doing that he’ll feel the way he did that night with Theo in his arms. Theo’s eyes are so pretty and his smile so genuine and warm, Liam can’t look away, he rubs over the screen and feels his eyes burn a little. He’d never fallen so hard and so fast in his life. And he wants to be able to be happy about it, he wants to tell Theo that he stole his entire heart in only a few seconds.

 

Just then, a notification from JayJay69 pops up, a new post. Liam taps on it. Jaymie’s posts are always fantastic and usually makes him laugh. He doesn’t expect it to knock out the air of him when he sees Theo’s sitting with Jaymie, pretty Theo,  _ his _ Theo. They’re on a park bench, looks like Jaymie went for a run. But Theo… he’s just… inexplicably, deadly and purely beautiful.

 

Liam’s finger hovers over the heart button for a few seconds, doesn’t take much for him to finally decide to press it. Because fuck, he likes that. He really, really does, And, just maybe Theo will see the stupid red heart and reconsider. Or it could just be too much and drive him away even further.

 

When he snaps out of it, it’s almost time for him to get to location. His manager raps on the door, and for now he has to leave his broken heart behind and put on a sexy face for the camera, one he doesn’t particularly give a shit about right now, and then get on a plane, so there’s no time to wallow.

 

But, he goes anyway, taking one last, long glance at his phone before locking it and tossing it in his bag.

 

“Liam!! We’re late!! I’ll leave you here with that creepy photographer!”

 

“Scott, I don’t care. He gives me candy.”

 

“Then I’ll leave you with that squid from last night!”

 

He squawks rather undignified, “I’m coming!!”

 

* * *

 

Jaymie’s been dragging Theo out with him every morning before work, really early, earlier than what seems humanly kind. Theo’s bargained himself out of running and into a semi brisk walk. He still hates it but has now learned to wear sweats instead.

 

He’s feeling revived and self-confident like he hasn’t in a long time. He feels hopeful. And it has a little to do with the fact that he’s trying to treat himself better, and also a little to do with the fact that Liam liked a photo of him. It’s silly to place that much weight on something so intangible, it could be nothing, it could be a horrible way of getting his hopes up. But for now, all he has is hope.

 

It’s day four when Theo gets home after another outing and Brett and Mason aren’t home, off to breakfast presumably, so Theo strips down. He’s sweaty and gross, so he heads for the shower.

 

While inside, hot water darting down his back and over his shoulders, he thinks of what he’ll say to Liam if he sees him again, how he’ll apologise and if it will even be enough. He wonders if Liam’s found anyone else, he’s a great-looking guy and probably doesn’t go through too much effort with dating. Theo tries not to dwell on that thought, he pushes it away and turns to the mirror- a shower mirror, Brett’s idea of course. He takes a deep breath.

 

“Okay…” he says to himself and exhales. Jaymie instructs him every day to name at least one thing he likes about himself so that’s what he’s been doing. He inspects his reflection, “The positive stuff…”

 

He tilts his head to the side, hand coming up to his belly. If he’s honest- it’s not that big, it’s not solid like Liam’s, or toned and ripped, but it’s not as hideous as he tells himself it is. When he turns to the side he rubs over it, sees that it only pokes out a little, and now that he’s not wearing tight jeans it doesn’t look so squished either. And okay, maybe the belly is kind of cute.

 

That brings him to his ass, there’s not much he wants to change because along with the extra weight comes a perfectly round butt, and Theo himself likes guys with something to hold in the back. So, he doesn’t dwell too long there.

 

His thighs look kind of strong when stands up like this, again, not athletic but firm. Solid. (a product of brisk walking?) He likes them, and it feels good thinking that. He feels good about what he sees, so he keeps looking and it’s not like he can miss his dick, it’s there. And he’s been told it’s nice looking too, just the right size. He smiles, maybe one day he’ll get it wet again. Maybe Liam could help with that.

 

He quickly veers his attention to his arms while he’s washing them. Jaymie said they’re nice, he’s never paid much attention to his arms before, but guesses, when he looks at the way they flex, they’re not bad. The only part that still bugs him, and probably always will, are his love handles. Those aren’t great, and pretty much in the way of everything he tries to wear. He’ll hate those forever.

 

It feels good all this positive thinking instead of putting himself down all the time. Theo’s still not convinced he’s much to look at, or that most guys can look past the cubbyness but if he can start to not give a shit and just live his life, then he’ll be a hell of a lot happier.

 

Theo's deep in thought when he gets out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist, still properly wet. He shakes his hair out and only notices Josh when he looks up. He's standing in the kitchen, arms folded and his eyes dark. Theo startles, jumps slightly.

 

“Hey bubs,”

 

Theo’s not sure why Josh’s voice sounds like that, it’s not taunting or playful like it always is. It’s different.

 

“Uh, Brett’s not here. He’s out with his…”

 

“New boyfriend? Oh I know.” Josh smiles, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes and then his lips fall into a tight line, “Fucked my brains out and then moved on like I never existed.”

 

“You’re not married to the guy Josh, you’re not even together. He can do what he wants.” Josh glares at him and it’s not like Theo’s trying to say Brett can treat people like that but he’s naked and Josh is being intimidating as usual, so he’s not really sure what exactly to say.  Theo shifts around, crosses his arms over his chest. He’s got a sudden urge to cover himself, wishes Josh will just go already. Why is he even here?

 

Josh saunters over, drags his finger along the kitchen counter but his eyes stay fixed on Theo, pinning him in place, “I’m not his little bitch. He can’t just discard me like this. Does he do that to you too huh bubs? Gives you the fuck of your life and then acts like you don’t exist? Hmm?”

 

He’s  really close to Theo now, he can smell the sharp cologne Josh wears. He’s trembling, but it’s not from excitement or anything close to that, he’s scared. Josh is scaring him. Something’s not right, “We’re not like that Josh… Listen, what the fuck do you want? I told you Brett’s not here…”

 

Josh looks down to where the towel is tucked in on Theo’s hip, “No… but you are…” his eyes flick up to Theo’s, dark and unkind. Angry. “I know you’ve got a little crush on me bubs…”

 

Theo swallows, realises that’s hard to do, like his throat is closing up. He wants to run away, “N-no… not anymore. Josh, please just leave... please.” He thinks he hears something outside the door but nothing happens after that, no one’s entering, he wishes someone would though.

 

Then, faster than he can blink, Josh’s hands slide up to his ribs, almost gets to squeezing before Theo shoves him away hard, “No! What the fuck are you doing??”

 

“Bubs come on, you look so hot like this, come on… you’ve been working out yeah?”  he comes at Theo again but this time, before Theo can even answer or flinch, someone yanks Josh back and tosses him toward the door.

 

It takes Theo more than a few seconds to realise Liam's standing in his kitchen, furious blue eyes blazing before he turns around and storms over to Josh, pulling him up by the collar of his golf shirt. Liam shoves him into the wall so hard Theo’s surprised there’s not a Josh shaped indent when he pulls him away again. Just for good measure Liam pins Josh to the wall with his forearm.

 

“He said no.” Liam seethes, the fury practically dripping from his tongue, “He asked you to leave you piece of shit.” he shoves him back hard again and Josh whimpers, eyes wild. Theo doesn’t give a shit that Josh is scared right now. Fuck Josh.

 

“Get the fuck out. And if you come any place near him again I’ll cut your feet off at the fucking ankles, understand?” Josh stares dumbstruck so Liam pushes back on his throat, “I asked if you understood what I said, asshole.” and then Josh nods. Liam hurls him out the door by the back of his shirt and he stumbles out into the hallway, disappearing down the stairs.

 

Theo stands there frozen. Liam too. Both breathing fast and then Liam turns slowly.

 

“Theo.”

 

“Liam…”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ha! how dramatic!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of non-consensual touching and unhealthy/verbally abusive relationship. Please read carefully.

Liam looks for the familiar face in the swarm of people exiting the gates, and when he sees Mason he smiles. That’s what he was looking forward to, the comfort of home, maybe a pair of green eyes too.

  
  


“Hey buddy!” Mason hugs him and takes his hand luggage.

  
  


“Hey Mase.” he greets and follows Mason out to his car.

  
  


“You look… well, like a model,”

  
  


“Shut up you dork.”

  
  


“How you doing?” Mason’s got that look on his face, the soft one, a sympathetic one he uses when he knows Liam’s hurting or upset, and it helps Liam ease up and talk. Not everyone gets him to do that.

  
  


“Guess I could be better, I mean Thailand was great, lots of fun. But…”  

  
  


“Listen bud, there’s some shit you need to know… and it’s nuts but maybe it’ll improve your mood a little… sort of.”

  
  


Liam’s heart leaps a bit, he smiles, “You hooked up with the guy from Starbucks?? And he’s great in bed??”  

  
  


There’s a pink flush across Mason’s face and he shuts the boot, gets in the car and starts up the engine. Liam gets in too.

  
  


“Oh my god you totally hooked up!!! And he’s great in bed!! Fucking high five me, I have great taste in guys for you!!” he lifts his hand and Mason meets it with a roll of his eyes, snorts and looks away.

  
  


“Yeah, look you left before I could tell you. He’s amazing, so fucking tall dude. I died. The things he can… nevermind?” he hands Liam one of the coffees he picked up, “Anyway, that’s not the good part - I mean for me sure - but it gets better. Uh, depending on how you look at it.”

  
  


Mason’s giving him a look that reminds Liam of a kid that found a stash of candy.

  
  


“What?? You’re eloping? Because like, it’s early but I support you and-” Mason’s always been a hopeless romantic.

  
  


“Noooo. No dude.  _ Dude.”  _ he takes a sip, gets them onto the highway, “Okay so, Brett - Starbucks dude -… are you ready for this?”

  
  


“Mason! Come on tell me.”

  
  


“Brett turned out to be Theo’s roommate!”

  
  


Liam’s momentarily silenced, not sure he understands. Brett. Theo. Mason. Something’s supposed to make sense, but it doesn’t. Still, his heart is pounding at the mention of Theo’s name because now he’s picturing his face, and imagining his voice and how warm and soft his body is. And now his heart hurts.

  
  


Mason sees that he’s not going to connect the pieces soon, so he continues, “Theo saw you guys. He saw you and Brett talk in Starbucks because like he always gets his drinks where Brett works… he saw you give Brett my number...”

  
  


Liam’s jaw does that questionable opening and closing thing, he’s still lost, “I don’t…”

  
  


“He didn't know it was  _ my _ number Liam!! He thought…”

  
  


It hits him like a truck, “Oh god!!” he spills some coffee in his lap in an effort to turn toward Mason, “He thought I was… with Brett… with the number… oh god!!!”

 

“Yeah!! I mean, he probably should have checked with you, but like… he doesn’t hate you. I know you said he hates you just before you left...”

 

Liam’s voice softens, “Theo’s different Mase, he’s just… he’s been hurt, he’s insecure. People are cruel and they don’t see what I see…”

  
  


“Yeah, because they’re not in love with him. Look, I’ve been dying to tell you since I found out.”

  
  


“Guess it makes sense… like we spend a night together and the next thing he sees me with another dude… I just thought… you know, thought I was being me again.” he looks down, feeling kind of sick thinking about it all.

  
  


“Liam. Look, we’ve been through this. There’s nothing wrong with the way you love people. Anyone would be lucky to have you. Theo’s been moping around since he’s realised this was all a fuck up. He wants to see you so bad…”

  
  


“Yeah?” a little spark of hope ignites in Liam’s chest, that maybe it’s all salvageable and maybe they can both still be happy.

  
  


“Yeah buddy. So look, we’re almost home… I know for a fact Theo’s at his place, it’s school break. I can turn off in a few meters and take you to home or I can keep going to Theo’s… what’s it gonna be?”

  
  


There’s honestly nothing Liam wants more than to see Theo right now… it’s all he’s wanted the whole time he was away, but there’s something incredibly intimidating about it now, scary even. Who's to say Theo will feel the same, it’s been a few days. What if he shuts the door in Liam’s face?

  
  


“Uh…”

  
  


“Come on buddy… turn off in five…. four…”

  
  


“Mason!”

  
  


“Three…. two…”

  
  


“Mase!”

  
  


“Choose Theo!!”

  
  


Liam squeals, laughing, “Okay! Okay!!” and Mason misses the turn off to Liam’s apartment, “Take me to Theo.”

  
  


“Good boy!” Mason laughs and finishes his coffee, “I can’t wait to tell Brett!”

  
  


“Oh wait, will Brett be there, I don’t think I can…”

  
  


“No, my boo’s at the dentist, picking him up after this.”

  
  


The way Mason smiles is ridiculous, he’s pretty far gone, Liam can tell just by looking at him. He just hopes this Brett dude treats him right or he might need to invest in a step ladder and beat the shit out of him. There’s no way he’ll reach him otherwise, the guy’s a giant.

  
  


Mason pulls up to Theo and Brett’s flat and Liam’s nerves are already bundled up in his shoulders, he’s trembling slightly too.

  
  


“Hey chill.” Mason says like he knows Liam’s freaking out. And in moments like this Liam’s thankful that he’s got a best friend like Mason. The guy knows him inside out.

  
  


“Yeah. I’m chilling. Kinda. God, I’m gonna die.”

  
  


“Nah, you’re fine model boy. He’s on the second floor, number 95. I’ll drop your shit off at The Iris. Oh, and Liam… Theo’s been hanging out with Jaymie…”

  
  


“Oh god, I know. Better go see how much rubbed off on him.” Liam winks and smiles, shuts the door. And then he’s on his own and his heart's pounding like something mad in his chest. He’s never been so nervous about a boy or a girl for that matter. Well, before Jackson anyway, now he just sort of doubts himself around every corner and he hates it.

  
  


He sucks in a deep breath and enters the building, makes his way up to the second floor, searches only for a few seconds for Theo’s flat number, and then he’s standing in front of the door, about to pass out. But, when he lifts his hand to knock, he hears voices… two guys, and he can’t help the pang of disappointment he feels.  _ Has Theo moved on already? Maybe this was a mistake.  _ But then…

  
  


_ “N-no… not anymore. Josh, please just leave… please.” _

  
  


And Liam’s body goes cold because Theo’s voice isn't right, it’s shaky and scared and small. He doesn't act yet, he listens again and he feels sick.

  
  


_ “No! What the fuck are you doing??”   _

  
  


Liam sees red. He storms in, thankful for an unlocked door. A a tall brunette guy surges for Theo - who is half naked - but he doesn’t get far because Liam’s got him by the neck and after that he doesn’t remember much. The anger takes over and for once he doesn’t try to tame it down. He lets it out because it’s needed right now, he just prays he doesn’t kill this motherfucker on the spot.

  
  


When Liam gets a hold of himself and stops seeing in flashes of rage, Theo’s standing in front of him shaking, wrapped in a bath towel and all Liam can say is his name.

  
  


“Theo.”

  
  


“Liam…”

  
  


He realises Theo must feel pretty exposed and scared right now so he reaches for the blanket that’s thrown over the couch and walks toward Theo slowly, throwing it over his shoulders to cover him up. He watches Theo curl into it, almost shrinking.

  
  


Theo sighs, still shivering, but he doesn’t look as scared as he did a few moments ago, “Are you okay? Did he…”

  
  


“Uhm... he didn’t… no.” Theo seems a little out of it and he’s probably confused about why Liam’s there and Liam’s kind of confused too. He didn’t have a plan for this part of the plan.

  
  


“I think you should sit down yeah?” he reaches for Theo but stops, he’s sure unsolicited touching isn't something he’d want right now. Instead he steps out of the way to let Theo move to to the couch. He’s hesitant, watching Liam.

  
  


“Can I sit with you?”

  
  


Theo nods, eyes still on Liam, “Thank you… for coming in when you did. I don’t know…” his voice breaks off and his eyes fade to void again.

  
  


“I’m sorry I got a little rough with him... I didn’t mean to scare you.”  and he realises that maybe that guy wasn’t the only one bearing the brunt of his anger issues. Theo witnessed it too but he’s shaking his head.

  
  


“You didn't. Kind of wished you knocked him out and left him for Brett to find.”

  
  


“Brett’s your roommate yeah?”

  
  


Theo nods, looks down, and Liam doesn't know how start this conversation, all he wants to do is hold this boy and make him feel safe again.

  
  


“Was that guy… was that your boyfriend or?”

  
  


This time he shakes his head vigorously, “No. God no. A friend, sort of. I’ve known him for a while.”

  
  


“Always the ones you know huh.” Liam shudders thinking about what could have happened if he asked Mason to take him home instead, “But he’s not your friend Theo. Not if he… not if that’s what he wanted from you, in that way. He’s not your friend.”

  
  


“I know…” and his beautiful eyes well up and his lips tremble. God, Liam wants to hold him so so bad.

  
  


“Will it be okay if I hugged you?” he asks quietly, praying the answer’s yes, but he quickly adds, “You can say no.”

  
  


And then Theo’s face cracks and he properly cries, “Please.”

  
  


Liam wraps him up in what’s probably the tightest hug and holds him just like that, smooths his hand over Theo’s wet hair. He only lets go when Theo pulls away slightly.

  
  


“Liam I’m so sorry…”

  
  


“That’s not important right now…”

  
  


“But I need you to know that I never wanted to hurt you, I don’t want to hurt anyone. Ever. I should have talked to you first. So I’m sorry.”

  
  


“Listen, why don’t you get some clothes on. I’ll make tea or whatever, if that’s okay… and if you’ve stopped shaking by the time you get back, we can talk about it, okay?” Liam smiles at him and his heart skips a few beats when Theo grins back and blushes. It’s fucking beautiful.  _ He’s _ beautiful. And absolutely perfect.

  
  


“Yeah okay… But, uh, I don’t drink tea. Brett’s got some of that green shit in the silver container if you want, but I’ll take coffee.” He gets up, winks at Liam and Liam nearly dies, “I’ll be back soon.”

  
  


“Take your time.” he manages to say. This boy’s going to be the end of him. He’s going to lose himself totally and completely to the way Theo smiles, and he’s going to love every fucking second of it. He knows it.

  
  


Liam’s pouring the water into some cups when Theo comes out barefoot, dressed in soft-looking faded blue jeans and a loose white crew neck sweater, he’s got his hair combed back leaving his face open. Liam joins him on the couch where he’s sitting with his legs pulled up under him, and hands him a steaming cup of coffee.

  
  


“I’ve stopped shaking…” Theo says and smiles.

 

Liam takes a sip of tea, “Show me your hands.” Theo holds one hand out to Liam, and he takes it, pretends to be inspecting it, “Okay fine… talk.”

 

“I’m a fucking idiot.”

  
  


Liam laughs at that, doesn’t let go of Theo’s hand, “Kind of, yeah. Look Mason, told me what happened… But Theo, I’m not like that. I know maybe because you think I’m a model that’s the kind of thing I do… I don’t. I respect people because that’s what I want from them. Pretty simple.”

  
  


Theo looks down, frowns, like he’s scolding himself all over again, “I’m sorry. I know you’re not. I just… I get kind of fucked up you know. Guess I still don’t get why you would even…. And then I see you with a guy like Brett and-”

  
  


“A guy I can barely reach?”

  
  


Theo chuckles, “A guy without love handles and shit. And yes okay, I know I need to stop that, and I have, for the most part. I’ve been doing some introspection. And I’ve been a total wet blanket, but I know that now…. And I wanna make it better,” he swallows, “I wanna make it right.” he’s looking at Liam with so much hope in his eyes, pleading like it wasn’t already a given that Liam would let him.

  
  


“I get it. And I think we all have our insecurities… I do too, after…” and then he cuts himself off and looks away. He’s not sure how much of his past Theo wants to know.

  
  


“After… Jackson?”

  
  


Liam looks at him again, “Yeah… after him.” Theo’s hand tightens in his.  

 

“What happened with you two… what did he do?” Theo's speaking softly, and Liam knows he must look like a kicked puppy, kind of feels that way too.

 

Liam looks down into his mug, takes a deep breath, “It was always a little rough with us. Up and down... but mostly down,” Liam gives a half smile. “Things really went to shit when he began travelling, apparently for work… he was never home anymore, and always on his phone when he was.” he swallows.

 

“You don't have to tell me.” Theo says and Liam knows he’s being sincere, he’s not trying to fish for gossip or be nosey. He cares, it’s written all over his face and it’s doing stupid things to Liam’s heart.

 

“I want to.” then he squeezes Theo's hand, “So this one night, we had an argument because he didn’t even look at me when he got back, and I moaned about it… and like afterwards we had make up sex but...” he blushes a little at that.

 

Theo frowns, “He hurt you?”

 

Liam shakes his head, “No, not like that. It just wasn't love anymore you know... Felt wrong. And he was getting pissed that I went soft, ‘cause I wasn't into it.”

 

“Jesus Liam.”

 

“I stopped him, told him to get off. But then… I don’t know, he snapped, started calling me clingy, needy, selfish. Started breaking things... I guess for wanting to spend time with him, for needing affection, for not taking his dick right. Fuck knows….”

 

Theo looks sad, “I'm so sorry…”

 

“I loved him…” Liam feels his already weak smile waver, his eyes sting with tears, and he clenches his jaw to keep them back, “I loved him and looked up to him, but all I was to him, was a burden. A chore. A needy chore.”

 

“You’re not any of those things Liam…”

 

“I was young Theo. And when someone like that, someone older and someone you idolized, tells you those things, it kinda sticks with you. So when I didn’t hear from you I thought that maybe I was too much with asking you to stay over, with making you sleep on the couch with me after just one night...”

 

“No,” Theo brings Liam’s hand up, kisses the back of it, “You didn't  _ make  _ me do anything. I wanted to stay. I stayed because it felt good Liam, because you made me feel good about myself.”

 

“You did?” he somehow finds the smile again, Theo makes that easy to do.

 

“I like being around you. I like the way you look at me. I stayed because that’s what I wanted. And…” he blushes again,  “a guy like you can cling to me any day. I don’t care.”

 

At least that makes Liam laugh, and he watches Theo’s eyes crinkle as he laughs too. Things go quiet for a little while and they don’t say anything. They finish off their drinks and place their cups down. Theo finally breaks the silence.

 

“Why don't you care? When you look the way you do… why don't you care that I'm not perfect?”

 

It takes Liam by surprise because all he’s ever seen Theo as, is perfect, but he tells him the truth, “Because we ask for someone to care about, maybe fall in love with. Not for the package they come in.”

 

“I’m sorry for being a presumptuous dick…” Theo says, and he looks Liam right in the eyes with those green emeralds of his, almost melts him entirely, “But please let me make it up to you. Please?”

 

“I’d be stupid if I didn’t. Tell you what let's start over completely… you still have to make it up to me - I’m looking forward to that part - but… Hi, I’m Liam. I’m apparently needy and clingy but I hear you like that kinda shit.”

 

He watches Theo’s face break out in a huge smile, “Yeah, okay. Fine. Uhm, Hey, I’m Theo. I have perpetual body issues and will assume you’re a cheating cheater who cheats. Nice to meet you.”

 

“Nice to meet you Theo.” Liam smiles, “I think we’re gonna be just perfect for each other.” Liam says and leans forward, with every intention of kissing Theo, just as the front door opens and a huge tall dude he recognizes as Brett walks in, his mouth kind of swollen.

 

“Uhm hi…”

 

Theo gets up, “Hey Bready.” turning to Liam, “You know Liam yeah?” and then he looks kind of shy. Liam fucking adores that look.

 

“Yeah, the guy that had you go crazy and stop speaking to me for a week?” Brett smirks and places his stuff down on the counter, waves at Liam.   
  
  


“Ha, you too, huh. Hi again Starbucks.” Liam grins and waves back, “Wasn’t Mason with you?”

 

“Oh, yeah. He went to get lunch. I’ll let him know to bring extra, didn’t know you guys would be here.” Brett’s picking up the phone and tapping out a text to Mason, “So what did Josh want? He called me earlier, sounded moody.”

 

Liam watches Theo freeze on the spot and he looks a little pale. He wonders if it’s his place to say anything, to even bring it up. On the other hand, Theo mentioned leaving Josh for Brett to find and that makes him think that whatever Brett will do to the guy if he finds out, is perhaps worse than what Liam in a fit of rage is capable of… maybe… probably not. He grimaces and brings himself back to the present.

 

When they’re both quiet Brett stops typing and looks up, first at Theo who looks away, and then at Liam whose jaw is clenched in a telltale sign that something’s wrong.

 

“What happened?” Brett asks but it’s not really a question. He puts his phone down, all his attention now on Theo. And Liam can immediately see the bond between them, the protectiveness that suddenly bursts from Brett when Theo still doesn’t speak. He feels a huge wave of relief knowing Theo’s got someone like this in his life.

 

“Hey, buddy. Tell me what happened…” Brett comes closer and his voice goes really soft.

 

Theo tries to shrug it off and says, “Brett, it’s nothing. He’s just and asshole.”

 

“Yeah, I know that bud. But he’s always an asshole, he doesn’t always make you look like you’ve seen a ghost though…”

 

“Look it’s over now. He came on to me. I said no. He didn’t stop, Liam made him. It’s done.”

 

Brett looks at Liam, and he nods gives him a stiff smile. Liam brings his hand to Theo’s back, rubs up and down slowly.

 

“Hm.” Brett goes icy at that, and steps back and whatever flashes through his eyes chills Liam to the core. Brett’s not someone you fuck with, he realises. Mason’s in good hands, and Liam and his step ladder are both fucked if he ever hurts Mason.

 

“Brett… hey, no.” Theo’s calling after him as he starts toward the door, “Bready! Come on!..... Ah shit.”

 

“Should we go after him?” Liam asks, a bit terrified to do that but for Theo he will.

 

“Nope. Huh uh. He’s better off alone when he gets like that.”

 

“Listen, I hate to leave you right now, but I need to meet up with my manager for photo selection, and I’ve gotta shower before that, so…”

 

“Oh… yeah. Yeah, That’s fine. Mason’s on his way over with food, apparently. He can keep me company.” Theo smiles, stuffs his hands into the pockets of his faded jeans.

 

Liam stares at him, probably longer than he needs to, before he moves to the door, “Theo…”

 

“Hmm?”

 

_ I think I’m already so fucking gone on you. _

 

“Unblock my number yeah?”

 

Theo chuckles softly and nods and Liam leans forward, cups Theo’s chin and plants a gentle kiss to his cheek. He feels the skin heat up beneath his lips.

 

“See you soon.”

 

“See you Liam.”


	6. Chapter 6

 

Mason’s handed them each a take-out box full of Chinese noodles. They’ve just started digging in, in relative silence when the door swings open. Brett’s standing there rather agitated and looking a bit rough, sweating.

 

“Well, I don't think that fucker’s gonna touch another person as long as he’s alive, whether they want him to or not.” he says, and when Mason and Theo are over their initial shock they dart towards him, leaving the noodles discarded.

 

“Oh my god…” Theo spots his bloody fist first, his knuckles are red and bruised, “What did you do??” Brett’s shaking too.

 

“Nothing he didn’t deserve.”

 

Brett’s voice is a little shaky although he’s trying his best to hide it. He’s suddenly aware of Mason staring wide eyed at him, mouth agape. Brett reaches out with his clean hand, places it on Mason’s shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry… didn’t mean to upset you. Didn't want you to see me like this.” he says quietly. Theo thinks this is a great time to get something to clean Brett up with and give them a moment. Seems like they need it.

 

He gets a wet cloth from the bathroom and the small medi-kit the keep under the basin, Theo’s had to patch Brett up a few times, the guy packs quite a punch and his knuckles - sometimes his face too - bears the weight of it. Brett doesn't go looking for trouble, but he never stays silent when he stumbles upon it. Theo really appreciates that about his friend. Brett fights the good fight with nothing to gain for himself. So patching up broken fists is the least Theo can do to say thanks.  Theo would have let the whole thing slide.

 

Brett’s hands are in Mason’s when Theo returns, he’s inspecting the wounds.

 

“You okay bud?” Brett asks when Theo takes up a space beside him. That’s so typically Brett, he thinks, and recalls the couple of times Brett was practically dead but wanted to make sure Theo was fine, usually after some asshat treated him badly.

 

“I’m fine Bread. Why don’t you just sit down and let me clean this.”  he catches Mason’s eyes and realizes he’s probably overstepping his bounds by touching Brett. He doesn’t want to make Mason uncomfortable or cause problems so he holds the medi-kit and cloth out to him instead, “Uhm, you wanna do this?”

 

Mason shakes his head vigorously, waves his hands between them and steps back, “God, no. No,” he swallows, looks at Brett, “I like you. Like, really like you, but I can’t with the blood…”

 

Brett snorts, “That’s fine Mase. Theo’s pretty good at this. Kinda used to it too.” he grins coyly at Theo and Theo knows he feels a little guilty.

 

“That’s true.” Theo says and swipes the wet cloth over his knuckles. He’s careful at first, he can't see the cuts so he's not sure how deep they go but soon finds that the blood isn’t Brett’s at all, “Oh good, it’s not your blood.” he says. The knuckles are still really red and bruised though.

 

Mason seems relieved at that and stands closer. Theo smiles when Brett leans his giant body down and places a soft kiss on Mason’s cheek. He’s pretty gone on him, Theo can tell. Brett’s not one for showing affection in front of people at all. With Mason he doesn't seem to mind.

 

“I hate to ask this… and I don’t really care, just curious… how bad does Josh look?” Mason asks taking the red soaked cloth from Theo and tossing it in the bin.

 

Brett’s face hardens, “Lets just say it’s a good thing his lackeys showed up otherwise he’d be dead.”

 

Theo stops cleaning for a second and looks up at Brett, “There were more of them?? Jesus Brett, this could have ended so bad.”

 

He just smirks, “It did end badly. For Josh.”

 

Theo totally feels bad for the douche bag. Josh had it coming, but he still feels bad because he knows it'll be injuries that warrant a visit to casualties.

 

He finishes up Brett’s hand, applies ointment and a thin bandage while Mason grabs Brett some water and an ice pack for his eye. It's a darkish purple around his cheekbone and a bit swollen, “So he got a shot in too, huh?”

 

“The first one. You know me buddy. I don't swing first. His little bitch ass can run to the cops and I'll just call it self defense.” Brett shrugs and takes a sip of water.

 

“Tell me he jumped to reach you…. I'm gonna die of laughter.” that kind of breaks the tension a bit and the three of them giggle. Mason's hand rests soothingly on Brett’s thigh.

 

“All done Bready.” Theo’s hand remains on Brett’s cheek, under the bruise and he looks him in the eye, “Thank you. You know that wasn't necessary…. And I'm sorry you got hurt.”

 

Brett pulls both him and Mason in for a hug, “It was totally necessary and I'd do it again. Now, someone said there's food!”

 

And that’s how they end up on the three seater looking like sloths while watching - for some unknown reason - reruns of Cake Boss. Their bellies are stuffed, Mason picked up extra large portions. Their legs are draped over one another, while they slurp lazily at their drinks.

 

“These cakes are insane… would you ever even eat that?”

 

“Dude, it’s cake. Of course you’re gonna eat it.”

 

“It looks like a person!”

 

Brett perks up and winks at Mason, “You had no issues with eating people last night…”

 

Theo kicks them both, “Hey! Hey hey hey. I’m still here.”

 

“So? Close your eyes.” Brett snakes his arm around Mason’s middle, sticking his tongue out at Theo like he’s three years old, “Or go visit Liam. I'm sure he’d like to eat…”

 

Theo tosses a couch pillow at Brett, hits him square in the face without hitting Mason, “Shut up!” God, that is the last thing he’s trying to picture… Liam’s mouth on him like that, touching him. A rush of shivers races down his spine and luckily his phone beeps a few times, so he focuses on that instead. The other two are still going at it, properly making out beside him, and he’s keeping them at bay with his foot. Brett doesn’t seem bothered at all.

 

Theo swipes his phone to life, he sees a message from Liam and his heart lights up like one of those neon signs in the dark, realizes there’s a dumb grin on his face.

 

 **_From LiamD:_ **   
_Hey beautiful boy. I’m done with work. What you up to?_

 

He feels his cheeks heat up. This is insane. How is this gorgeous guy calling him beautiful? How the hell did he get so lucky?

 

 **_To LiamD:_ **   
_I’m watching Mason and Brett make out. Right next to me. No shame._

 

 **_From LiamD:_ **   
_LOL, jealous?_

 

 **_To LiamD:_ **   
_Envious…_

 

He bites his lip.

 

 _**From LiamD:** _   
_I can totally help with that. Wanna do something tonight?_

  
**_To LiamD:_ **   
_Fuck yes. Need to get out of here. I think they’re about to get naked._

 

They’re not. Brett’s kissing Mason really sweetly and holding him close. Theo just wants that too. Desperately wants Liam’s lips back on his own, smell him, hold him. Just seeing him is fine too.

 

 **_From LiamD:_ **   
_!!! Okay. Movies? Your pick._

 

 **_To LiamD:_ **   
_Sounds great. Pick you up at about 7pm?_

 

 **_From LiamD:_ **   
_*happy dancing* Okay! I’ll tell Jay to let you up!_

  
**_To LiamD:_ **   
_You’re a dork aren’t you?_

**_From LiamD:_ **  
_Liiiitle bit._

 

“Why the fuck are you grinning like that??” Brett’s finally pulled away from Mason long enough to remember Theo exists.

 

“It’s that friend of mine, I’m sure.” Mason says, squirming out of Brett’s hold to go to the bathroom.

 

“It is indeed your friend.”

 

Brett barks out a laugh, “Oh my god, you’re blushing!?”

 

“Shut up Bread. What’s the time?”

 

“Ten to six. Why?”

 

“Jeez, we spent the whole day on this fucking couch huh?” he mumbles then smiles smugly, “I’ve got a date in a bit.”

 

He probably rolls his eyes into another universe, still smiling, when they both shower him with ‘aws’ and gushing about how cute it is. He can’t wait to get back at Brett about this but for now he needs to shower.

 

The only problem is that he’s still in a semi food coma from earlier and laziness has taken over his being. Instead he flips through Liam’s Instagram, feels like a stalker doing it. As he’s scrolling, he notices the photos of Jackson are now gone, Liam must have taken them down and something about that thought makes his heart swell tremendously.

 

But then a sour taste settles in his mouth. Liam just looks so good. He's in incredible shape and Theo's starting to stress about what he's going to wear, about what could possibly live up to whatever Liam's going to wear. He knows that after all the food they just ate he's harboring a little food baby. He's up quickly now, headed to the bathroom.

 

Freshly out the shower he finds himself in front of his closet. He's been there for five minutes. Just staring.

 

There are his dark blue jeans. They look sexy but they're a little tight around the thighs and he can't sit comfortably, and his only longish top is in the wash. The check pants are too out there and the others really aren't options if he wants the fucking muffin top to stay inside  

 

Theo flops back down on the bed “Breeeeetttttt!!!!”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I don't know what to wear.”

 

“Jeans and a top.”

 

“So helpful.”

 

Of course. There's only one other option here.  He takes his phone out and brings up Jaymie’s number.

 

“Are you working?” Theo says when Jaymie picks up.

 

“Boo, I'm hustlin’. That's the same thing ain't it?”

 

Theo doesn’t know what the hell that means. “I need help. I'm being pathetic.”

 

“Look boo. I'm here at the tailor, should I swing by? I can't stay long though, Jay has world domination plans tonight honey!”

 

Jaymie is so utterly dramatic. Theo smiles anyway and replies, “Yeah. Please stop by. Just buzz the door. Brett will open…. Because I'm still naked.”

 

“Daaang guurl ‘tis my thang!!!”

 

That rips a loud cackle from Theo and he ends the call. It's not long after that, that he hears Jaymie at the door because the tailor is only a block away.  Theo's still sprawled out on the bed in his boxers, hiding under his robe.

 

“Theo.” Brett calls in his most sophisticated voice, “There's a sparkly person in our kitchen!”

 

Theo peeks outside, his mouth tugging into a grin at Brett’s amused expression. Jaymie’s wearing a deep purple wig and he’s got things on his eyes that look like glittery lashes and a huge bag with dry-cleaning inside is draped over his shoulder.  In turn, Jaymie’s pretty in awe of Brett, and that doesn’t surprise Theo in the least. It’s pretty much everyone’s reaction but Jaymie is kind of level with Brett in his stilettos, and that’s great.

 

“Maaaaase!!” Jaymie now notices Mason on the couch. Mason greets with a wave, totally unaffected, like he’s seen and experience this a million times, “All my honeys in one place, this is heaven. Welcome to the squad of eye candy I call friends big boy.” He says to Brett while raking his gaze down Brett’s lanky body, and the guy doesn’t know where to look, turns bright red. It’s hilarious. Mason and Theo laugh.

 

 “Come help me.” Theo says and Jaymie turns, leaving Brett there to collect himself.

 

Once inside Jamie sits down on the corner of the bed.

 

Theo sighs, “I’m going out with Liam tonight and I have no clue what to wear. All this shit just looks bleh.”

 

 “Hmm, bleh is definitely not acceptable for a date with my Lee. So… I’m guessing you two sorted out the drama?”

 

 “Well yeah. Kind of…. Mostly. We cool. But I feel like I really need to make this up to him. I feel like shit about it.”

 

“You said sorry, right boo? No need grovel for it. Not for his model ass or anyone.”

 

“No, I know. But he’s just really great…”

 

 “So are you.”

 

 “Jay, shut up and help me please. All this makes me look fat” How did they even get talking about this? Theo just wants a shirt that doesn’t make it obvious that he ate a tiny human’s weight in Chinese noodles.

 

“Okay, okay. Show me what we got.”

 

Theo tosses a variety of things onto the bed, most of which Jaymie pulls his nose up at. Finally he sees something worthy and pulls it out under the pile.

 

He yanks a black and white flannel shirt and then a pair of faded grey jeans. He rummages a little more and finally finds a loose white t-shirt for underneath, “Here, this is perfect. Won't even see your belly, not that anyone cares.”

 

“I care… What’s Liam gonna wear?”  he starts getting dressed in front of Jaymie. He doesn’t mind. Jaymie feels something like a sibling to him, older and wiser and a little bossy. Which is great, Theo likes that.

 

Jaymie’s head slants, “I am not that boy’s keeper honey, I don’t fucking know what Lee’s wearing?”

 

“Yeah but you know him better. What’s he normally got on when he goes out?”

 

 “You know,” Jaymie waves a hand around airily, “model boy stuff. Probably from the sponsor.”

 

 “Of course.” Theo pulls the jeans up over his butt and slips the t-shirt on, thankful he doesn’t have to iron anything. The flannel follows and Jaymie kicks his black and white vans to him then shrieks.

 

 “Ahhh you look so cute boo!!”, slamming his palms down on his cheeks, he yells even louder turning to the door, “Yo!! Lovebirds, get in here and see this!”

 

 “Jaymie!” Theo squawks. 

 

 And grinning innocently enough Jaymie replies, “What?”

 

Brett opens the door, Mason pops in under his arm. Theo thinks it’s sort of cute how much shorter Mason is. And that has him thinking of the inches of difference between him and Liam. It’s not much, but he loves the way Liam looks up ever so slightly from under his lashes. Makes his eyes look so pretty.

 

Now he’s thinking about how pretty Liam is, much prettier than any boy he’s ever dated. He’s not ruggedly handsome like his first boyfriend in high school or that classic handsome thing like Josh –which now is just gross to him. Liam is beautiful in the truest sense of the word.

 

“Theo! What the fuck are you doing buddy??” Brett laughs.

 

Theo makes a face, “Nothing. Shut up.”

 

“Probably thinking about Liam.” Mason jokes. If only he knows how right he is.

 

“No one in here blames you buddy. Your boyfriend is really hot.”

 

Theo goes red, “He is not my boyfriend. I hardly know him.”

 

“Are you going to ask him to be your boyfriend?” Mason muses, pulls Brett down beside him on the bed and Jaymie’s sitting crossed legged on the edge.

 

“How are you gonna do it? Like over dinner? With a little candle and shit?” Brett knows nothing about relationships, obviously. Good luck Mason.

 

Jaymie drops his two cents too, “You could just blow him?”

 

Theo rubs his face, “What? No… I mean… yeah, I don’t know… why are you all cross questioning me? What is wrong with you?” Theo grabs his hair wax and smears a blob into his palm, starts working it into his hair. They giggle.

 

 “So you don’t want to be his boyfriend?” Brett’s just teasing now.

 

He turns to them, exasperated and says, “Listen. Yes, I want to be his boyfriend, if he wants to be mine. And no, I’m not gonna ask him because I’m too chicken shit. Also no, I’m not blowing him…. yet.”

 

They howl in response to that last bit and he leaves them all right there and heads for the door because he’s turning beet red and smiling like an idiot.

 

 **_To: LiamD  
_** _Pick you up in 15._

 

 A minute passes.

 

 **_From: LiamD  
_ ** _Ahhhhh I’m not ready!!!_

 

Theo smiles and types back.

 

_**To: LiamD** _

_14…_

 

 **_From: LiamD:  
_** _… ahhhhhhhhhhh_

 

 **_To: LiamD  
_** _Get off your phone and get ready! :)  13..._

 

_**From: LiamD:**  
Ahhhhhh!!!! _

 

Theo snorts out loud. This boy is ridiculous.

* * *

 

 

The stops in front of The Yellow Iris and finds Liam waiting innocently on the sidewalk, hands folded in front of him and a silly grin on his face. Theo starts laughing when Liam jogs to the car and just about barrels inside. Theo wasn’t wrong though, Liam looks fantastic. He’s wearing tight denims and a navy-blue Henley with white converse. The Henley is fucking tight and Theo is having trouble focusing suddenly.

“Did you rush just to get out here and wait for me?”  Theo asks because Liam’s hair is tousled and there’s still a little toothpaste on his cheek.

Liam stares back with wide blue eyes that look dark in the dim light, “Maybe. You’ll never know.” And then he smiles and gives Theo a once over, “You look really nice!”

He blushes and mumbles back, “You too…” although he feels like that’s not at all sufficient. Liam looks fantastic, edible almost. Theo’s never wanted to devour something more in his life. He’s really firm and muscular, solid. His stomach doesn’t even fold when he sits.

“Uhm, you’ve got something…” Theo leans over, can practically feel Liam’s breath hitch at the proximity. He’s not doing any better but he licks his thumb and swipes softly at the smear of toothpaste on Liam’s cheek, "right here..." he’s waiting for Liam to do something but what he says has Theo feeling warm suddenly.

Liam’s eyes drop to his lips and he bites down on his own, and breathes out, “I really wanna kiss you…”

“I’m not stopping you at all…” Theo’s head tilts to the side and leans in at the same time Liam does and oh fucking god…

Liam brings his hand up to Theo’s neck to drag him a bit closer, pressing their lips together tightly. It’s soft and innocent, no tongue but it feels like a million things exploded in Theo’s head and he’s forgetting how to think entirely. Liam's lips are slightly wet and really smooth so Theo opens his mouth a little wider for more and Liam responds eagerly.

The driver behind them rudely slams down on the horn and it breaks them apart. They chuckle nervously, a little embarrassed and Liam settles back in his seat. He leaves his hand on Theo’s thigh while they drive though.

“Hey Liam…”

“Hmm?”

“You never have to ask to kiss me. I will always want that.”

“I know, but…”

“Always.”

Liam nods then smiles and resigns, squeezes Theo’s leg lightly.

Theo cinema isn’t too far away, in a small town like this it never is. Once they’re inside, they’re standing in front of the movie posters. There’s not a huge variety to choose from, Theo's not a fan of rom coms and Brett made him watch the action movie already. There’s one other option that he’s pretty excited about. He notices that Liam pointedly ignores the one he’s looking at, the horror poster, and thinks he’s probably seen it before but he’s going to try his luck anyway.

Liam clears his throat, “Which one…”

Theo immediately responds with, “The Conjuring!’ because he can’t watch it enough in this lifetime and Brett has thrown away their only copy since ‘it’s bringing the evil in here.’ He sure spooks easily for such a big dude.

Liam looks stiff, but he slides his hand into Theo’s while they wait for the tickets. His palm is a bit sweaty too.

“You okay?”

Liam’s eyes soften, “Oh, yeah. Yeah perfect.” He must see Theo staring… his lips are just so full and pretty and Theo really wants to kiss him again, and lucky for him Liam leans up, perfectly slotting their mouths together. His knees do that wobbly thing again when Liam’s lips part only slightly and he feels him breathe.

“That feels so nice.” Theo’s cheeks are warm when he whispers that into Liam’s ear, their sides pressed together, warm and comforting. He hasn’t kissed another boy in a while, only Liam. One of the best kisses he’s ever had, if not the very best. Hopefully the last too.

“Uhm. Here you go.” The lady behind the glass holds out two strips of tickets, eyeing them with a hint of irritation and when Liam moves to take the tickets, he makes a low groaning sound and pushes the tickets to Theo. He looks kind of pale.

“Are you feeling sick?? You look a little sick.” Theo’s starting to worry that maybe Liam has fallen ill but he once again assures him he’s fine and they head up to their theater.

A while later they’re seated and have popcorn and drinks that Liam insisted on paying for. Theo feels a little bad about that. Liam however hasn’t said a word since they got to their seats and along with looking pale he’s also pretty jittery- jumped when the lights went out for the previews to start.

Liam’s holding Theo's hand tightly in his lap and he’s sucking non stop on his Coke. This carries on for a good couple of minutes. It’s only when the first terrifying scene happens in the movie that it dawns on Theo what the problem is.

The doll, Annabelle, appears and there’s a sharp pang of music to add effect (as if that doll isn’t terrifying enough) and that’s when Liam practically jumps into Theo’s lap. His arms curl around Theo’s chest and his face is hidden away between Theo’s neck and shoulder. He’s clutching on so tightly Theo can barely breathe.

“Oh my god… you’re scared of horror movies…” Theo says softly, surprised and a little stunned, but he holds Liam’s arm that’s wrapped around his chest.

“Terrified.” Liam says shakily, voice muffled by Theo's skin and he's  not easing his grip at all, Theo can feel that he’s shivering just a bit.

He chuckles, “Come on let's get out of here.” Theo’s already up, taking their popcorn and drinks.

“We really don’t have to leave…”

“No, we have to. As much as I love that your face was in my neck like that, I’m not gonna let you sit through another second of Annabelle.

_“Ssshhh!!!!"_

“You shhh!” Theo waves the lady behind them off, making Liam giggle.

 

The outside lights are bright and they blink a few times before their eyes adjust, “You okay?” Theo asks. Liam’s bright red in his face, it’s adorable and Theo's hand is drawn to it like a magnet.

“I’m a total wuss for it… sorry about ruining the date.” Liam sighs dejectedly.

He rubs over Liam's pink cheek, “Hey, that’s okay. Nothing is ruined. I have a plan.”

“What plan?”

“Do models camp out in the backs of trucks?”

“If pretty boys ask them to, they’ll do anything. So yes.”

It’s Theo’s turn to blush, he thinks it’s safe to assume Liam’s talking about him and as he grabs Liam’s hand and calls him ridiculous, he can’t help but grin so hard his face hurts.

There’s a small little clearing off the far side of the preserve with a clear view of the town’s lights and where the moon also shines the brightest. Theo drives them there, Liam’s hand rests on his thigh again and he keeps looking over at Theo, the side of Theo’s face is basically on fire but he doesn’t mind.  

Theo parks the truck almost on the lip of the lookout and he’s got a small blanket that he throws out into the back. Liam gets out and Theo follows with the leftover popcorn and drinks.

They sit cross legged, facing each other. Liam totally looks like a teenager like this, sweet and sort of innocent, the moon catching his features just right and it makes it hard for Theo to look away. Not that he wants to.

“So, if it’s not horrors then what do you watch?” Theo grabs another handful of popcorn.

“You gonna laugh when I tell you?”

“Tell me first.”

“No. Promise first.”

Theo leans back, amused, “Yeah okay. Promise I won't laugh.”

Liam’s head tilts to the side like he’s trying to gauge if Theo is being sincere, but it’s adorable.

“Fine.” he says starting to smile, “Have you seen How To Lose a Guy In Ten Days.”

It’s not that he thinks it’s funny - guys can like chick flicks too - and if it were up to Theo he’d banish the term chick flick all together. Can it just be a rom com? His eyebrows just go up in surprise because he didn’t expect it, “Oh! Yeah, I did actually. Is that the one where two dudes meet in a bar and the chubby one gets all weird and stupid and the cute one runs away to Thailand?” Liam’s smiling now, “But then they kiss and make up, eventually. Is that the one?”

“Oh my god!” Liam laughs out loud, and when he collects himself says, “Yeah, that’s the one. But, uh, I kinda missed the kiss. How’d it go again?”

“Hmm,” Theo swallows down the popcorn with a sip of coke, wipes his mouth with his sleeve, “I’ll show you. C’mere.” then he leans forward with his hands on Liam’s knees.

Liam quietly whispers, “I can't believe that worked” and smiles before Theo captures his lips in a carefully tender kiss, also smiling. This one lasts a bit longer than the others because now they’re alone and there is no one around for miles… no reason to stop. And that means it gets heated quickly. Liam’s been flirting with him all night, plus all the subtle little touches, his hand on Theo’s thigh… not to mention that Theo is a sucker for compliments which Liam seems to have plenty of. It’s all got Theo pretty happy and enthusiastic about being around him.

They somehow push up to their knees and Liam’s hands come up to Theo’s sides while his mouth veers off course and starts down Theo’s neck, so soft and slightly wet but warm. The type of warm that makes goosebumps spread out over Theo’s skin, even more when Liam smiles into his neck, “This okay?” he murmurs.

Theo nods, “Hm...” and tilts his neck a little to the side. Liam’s hands go around his back. He’s hugging him closer, kissing his neck while looking like heaven itself and once Theo realises he’s getting hard he pulls away slowly, **begrudgingly**.

“I like that a little too much I think.” he blushes.

“God. Me too. Sorry….” Liam smiles meekly.

“No, no. I want to… Just…”

His eyes are still dark with want but he concedes, “Not out in the open. Same.”

Theo sits back down, leaning against the cab of the truck this time and hold his arm out for Liam to come sit with him, “Why don't you tell me about the rest of your favourite movies?”

Liam’s beautiful blue eyes twinkle at that and he flops down next to Theo, pulls Theo’s arm over his shoulder so he can play with his fingers, “There are way too many. Do you want top three of all time, or modern or classic?”

He’ll listen to Liam’s voice and feel their fingers slide together like this all night so he says, “All of the above.” and Liam’s face lights up like sunshine.

“Okay! So classics first!”

Theo has no fucking idea what Liam is talking about but he’s going to watch each and every one of these movies.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild smutty scenes marked with (*) at the beginning and end of the paragraph, for those who choose to skip.

 

It’s Monday morning and Theo’s short break from school is over. Classes start back up today and as much as he’d just like to spend every waking moment with Liam, as close as they were last night, he’s excited to get back to his job. He loves teaching and misses it when he’s been gone a while. Having great students probably helps. Not a lot of time was spent preparing new lessons, because well, he spent the last week pining over a cute boy and having coffee with another glittery one every morning, so he needs to get going early today to catch up.

 

Which reminds him that he needs to tell Jaymie he won’t be around for their run during the week. He pulls his phone out, there’s a message from Liam that he fell asleep on:

 

**_From LiamD:_ **

_Sweet dreams cutie._

 

It’s totally ridiculous that he’s blushing, it’s barely six in the morning. He scrolls down to find Jaymie’s chat to type out a quick message.

 

**_To Jaymie:_ **

_Back at work, no running anymore (thank god). Catch you on the weekend._

 

Almost instantly Jaymie shoots back.

 

**_From Jaymie:_ **

_Sounds like an excuse. Why you in school? Ain't you like 24?_

**_From Theo:_ **

_Jesus, why are you awake??? Wait, did you sleep?_

 

A picture comes in seconds later- Jaymie in the purple wig, now ruffled, one eye still has some glitter lashes on and the other is bare. He’s pouting like a pro, lipgloss still fully functional - the questionable guy in the back… not so much. Theo laughs and types back.

 

**_To Jaymie:_ **

_I take that as a no. Drink some water and be safe. Chat later._

 

**_From Jaymie:_ **

_I’m poppin boo! See you honey xoxoxoxoxo_

 

Again, he has no clue what Jay’s on about, but he doesn’t question it. Instead he drops the phone and pushes up out of bed with a disgruntled yawn and drags his feet to the shower. He’s awake enough to make sure he gets properly clean, but his eyes are shut for most of it. So naturally he starts daydreaming about Liam, about Liam’s hands on his body, the way he squeezed Theo’s thighs last night, how gently he nibbles at Theo’s lips when he really starts enjoying the kiss. The soft but discreetly desperate noises he makes when he shifts positions to get a better hold of Theo. Just… the entire concept of Liam being so fucking gone on him… it’s…

 

He’s hard.

*

Dammit. That was not the plan at all but he's kidding himself if he thinks this will go away anytime soon, not with Liam on his brain. His hand slips down lower, guilty so, and he grips himself tightly. It won't take much at all, he realises, as only the brief friction of his fingers sends shivers playing up his spine.  

 

All he can see while he tugs breathlessly at his dick is that huge portrait of Liam in his apartment, the one where is legs are spread wide open wearing the tight black lace underwear, and Theo thinks all that's missing from it is his head between Liam's leg and Liam's hand tugging his hair any way he wants to. That, and the thought of Liam's warm lips in his neck… his fingers roaming Theo’s body and how they’d feel potentially _in_ his body. _Fuck._

 

He comes pretty hard at that thought. Flashes of Liam’s teeth scraping along his skin, his hips grinding into Theo, flit through his mind until he’s done and stroked out completely. Not that any of that has happened yet, but holy shit he wishes it would.

* 

He dries of quickly, tries not to fret about the fact that he totally just jerked off to the thought of Liam and came faster than he ever has before, and is now wide awake too. And for some idiotic reason Brett’s bedroom door clicking open makes him jump. _God, Theo, get a grip. You’re and adult. You’re allowed to…_

 

Brett knocks quietly on Theo’s door, “Coffee??”

 

“Uh, yes. Please.”

 

“Sleep okay?”

 

He wishes Brett wouldn’t talk to him while his dick is still semi hard.

 

“Yeah, yeah slept good. I’ll be right out.”

 

“Sure.”

 

He starts getting dressed. School’s fairly easy to dress for because he’s more than certain that no one there is checking him out, so it doesn’t matter. He opts for his usual work attire- his grey linen suit and a plain white t-shirt underneath with white Vans. He thinks it looks smart-casual, Brett never gets the suit and t-shirt/sneaker combo. He’s comfortable though, his muffin top is hidden by the jacket and the pants sit just right and doesn’t squeeze or pinch anything. He ruffles up his hair with the towel, pleasantly surprised with the result. He’ll leave it messy like that.

 

 

Brett’s snoozing on the counter when Theo gets to the kitchen, the long limbs of his arms folded under his head. “Hi.” He grumbles and waves sleepily to the cup of coffee he made for Theo.

 

“Morning.” Theo smiles scrambling Brett’s hair around. Brett grumbles and sits up, he looks even sleepier than he usually does.

 

“Late night?” Theo asks, winking.

 

“Hmm. Mase only left at two this morning.”

 

“Why didn’t he just sleep here?”

 

“Well because he’s stubborn right, and…”

 

Theo laughs, quieting him, “Oh, ‘coz you take up the entire bed and he can’t get comfortable?”

 

He makes a childish, disgruntled face at Theo then peeks over the counter at what Theo’s wearing, “Ah, the suit and sneakers thing again huh?”

 

Theo sips at his coffee, rolls his eyes, “It’s a thing Bread. People wear it.”

 

Brett yawns and stretches, “People also summon the dead, doesn’t mean you should. I’ma buy you some nice church shoes for Christmas.”

 

“Brett, shut up.”

 

“How was your date buddy? Get laid?” he looks weirdly hopeful at that question. Theo furrows his brow.

 

“No?”

 

“You sound unsure there.” Brett narrows his eyes.

 

“I mean no.” He scratches at his face, only realising then that he didn’t shave, “Nothing happened.”  He feels a little shy admitting that. Brett’s usually pretty fast on the sex front, just gets right into it, even with Mason. Not that there is anything wrong with that, they’re adults, it’s just different with him and Liam. Like sure, he really wants to bang the guy – who wouldn’t – but he’s not in a total rush about it either. That has him wondering how Liam feels, if maybe he thinks Theo doesn’t want to because he hasn’t made any advances? Which just sets off a whole new spiral of panic.

 

“Well, do you want something to happen?”

 

“Have you seen Liam? You’ve got eyes, right?”

 

“Fair. So, what gives?”

 

Theo shrugs, “Nothing. Just haven’t been in the right setting for anything to happen you know.”

 

Brett smirks and Theo knows some horrible advice is about to follow, “If you’re creative enough any place is the right setting.” He wiggles his eyebrows stupidly at Theo.

 

“Right. Enough from you.” he downs the rest of his coffee and grabs his bag, “Gotta go!” Then he kisses his hand and smacks it to Brett’s forehead as he grabs his keys and heads for the door.

 

“Hey! I’m going out with Mase tonight!” he yells after Theo.

 

“Okay!”

 

“See? Perfect setting!!”

 

Theo hears Brett chuckle to himself as he disappears down the stairs, “Not listening to you!”

 

* * *

 

Liam woke up about thirty minutes ago. He’s having cereal on top of his kitchen island. The only reason he gets right up on top of it is because there’s a clear view of the sunrise from there as opposed to sitting on one of the stools- that’s if he’s up early enough to witness it.

 

Today he is. The peachy orange glow in the distance has just started filtering through the large glass window overlooking his sink, glowing right into his face - he doesn’t mind too much - it’s warm and feels homely. He finishes up his cereal and looks around for his phone among the mess on the counter, it’s on the other side and Liam is just that type of lazy that will roll himself all the way over there rather than go through the effort of jumping off to get it and then getting back on. Fully aware that the latter is far less work, he proceeds to roll his body until he reaches the phone, deciding to stay on his stomach. His mom will kill him if she sees him now.

 

The last message he sent was to Theo, telling him to sleep well. He sees it’s been read which means Theo must be up already. A swarm of butterflies flutter through his belly, and he smiles like an idiot to himself, wondering if sending another message will be too much.

 

He doesn't mean to get clingy, obviously that’s the last thing he’d ever want, but Theo just feels so safe to be around. Not in a ‘something's-gonna-happen’ kind of way, but in a way that makes it easy to smile, and talk and laugh, a way that leaves his guard down and he doesn’t worry about sounding or acting a certain way. He wants to be around him as much as he can. Liam wants to soak up all his warmth and start pulling him apart bit by bit, to find out exactly what it is he likes so much, every detail.

 

His reverie doesn’t last too long as his phone buzzes to life in his hand and he startles, sees the concierge desk’s number on his screen.

 

Liam rolls onto his back and answers with a grin, “Mr Bronson! How may I be of service?” he can hear the distant buzz of early morning traffic and the hollow echo of the empty lobby.

 

“That’s not my name boo.”

 

“Damn it. But it’s close right? I’ve almost got it?”

 

“Boo-boo, I’m dying please. Cut the shit and help me.”

 

Jaymie’s dramatic groaning and pleading makes Liam laugh, “What do you want?”

 

“I got two venti what-what’s if you can just supply the energy potion and aspirin.”

 

Liam hops down and grabs his gym bag, fishing out his creatine pre-workout, “This magic potion is my very expensive gym supplements you know. Not hangover cures.”

 

Jaymie lets out a long whine, sounding almost like a tantrum.

 

“Jeez, okay, okay! On my way.” Liam ends the call and quickly grabs a shirt and two tablets from his room before he heads down to the ground floor.

 

When the elevator door dings open, Jaymie has some scarf draped over his head, has big black sunglasses on and looks pretty frail from where Liam is standing.

 

“What did you do?!” Liam offers up the aspirin in exchange for one of the venti cups. Jaymie’s hand rattles when he takes it.

 

“Jesus boo. It was drag night at Ramps, I’m so done right now.” Jaymie tells him and swallows down the tablets with a bottle of sparkling water.

 

“Understandable.” Liam says, he jumps up on the marble desk, and begins blowing on his latte.

 

Jaymie makes a face and croaks out, “Why you always gotta sit on top of things huh?”

 

Liam grins down at Jaymie, “It’s fun.”

 

“It’s short man syndrome. You a grown ass man child.”

 

Liam pays him no mind and they sit and drink their lattes in silence, on their phones. He scrolls through Instagram, sees a few pictures of Jaymie’s escapades last night and lightly teases him about it. His fingers seem to automatically wander to the search bar and he types in Theo’s name, he’ll probably never get enough of this guy, and if he was given free reign he’d just stare at him all day, whether in person or in pictures because Theo is outright just one of the most beautiful people he’s ever seen. And he seems pretty into Liam if the smile he wears around him is anything to go by.

 

There’s one photo where Theo is laying down, smiling to the point where his eyes crinkle in the corners. He looks so soft, as if Liam could just cuddle up right beside him and nuzzle into him all day long. He's been going back to that photo since he met Theo, just can't tear his eyes away.

 

“Look at him!” Liam shoves the phone under Jaymie’s nose, “Look how cute he is!”

 

Jay lifts his glasses a little, “Yeah. Real cute boo.”  

 

Jaymie stares at him for a while and even through the glasses Liam feels undeniably scrutinised.

 

“What??”

 

“You’re in love.” Jaymie suddenly seems wide awake, grinning as he takes Liam in.

 

Liam’s gone bright red, flipping at the lid of the cup with his fingernail, “Well, I mean it’s still really early and...”

 

“No… no, I know that look.” Jaymie leans back, gaze still locked on Liam but there is suddenly something soft and fond in his eyes, “It’s been a while Lee… It’s been a long time since you looked like this.” and he smiles, almost sad.

 

“I know...” Liam fights back the lump in his throat with the knowledge that the emotions he’s feeling at Jaymie’s words are no longer ones of longing or sadness about things that could have been, but rather a flood of excitement and happiness of what lies ahead. The start of something beautiful.

 

“It’s gonna be okay boo.” Jaymie rubs Liam's knee, “He’s not like the other boys.”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“But you know that already, don’t you?”

 

Liam smiles, because he does. He knows just how different Theo is, how different he makes Liam feel, even in such a short amount of time. He wishes he could formulate the words and tell him that, make it sound as non-creepy as possible, that he’s totally, irreparably gone on him.

 

He doesn’t have those words yet, not until he is one hundred percent certain that Theo feels the same and that he’s here to stay, because Liam’s heart is still a fragile place - it’s still guarded, albeit by glass.  So, instead of a sonnet of his feelings for Theo, he decides a simple text would do.

 

Jaymie dozes off again while Liam crosses his legs atop on the concierge desk and begins typing his message. Just then a text notification pops up and his brain short circuits into slow motion.

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_Supposed to be prepping lessons. Thinking about you instead._

 

Liam squawks so loud it echoes right through the lobby, Jaymie jerks awake and flails around on his armchair, “Liam fucking Dunbar! What the fuck?? I’ma fucking...”

 

He knows he’s in trouble when Jaymie uses his real name and curses three times in a row, but he couldn’t care less right now, “Shhh, sorry, sorry, go back to sleep. I’ll watch the door.” Liam chuckles and returns to his message, reads it again just to be sure that’s what Theo said.

 

He sputters for a second not really sure what to say and then settles with:

 

**_To Theo:_ **

_Well, I haven’t stopped thinking about you._

 

And he thinks that’s pretty smooth. He’s happy with that response.

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_Making me blush :)_

 

**_To Theo:_ **

_:) what you up to._

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_Just grabbing breakfast from the bakery, forgot to pack food. Gross cafeteria lunch for me today._

 

**_To Theo:_ **

_See if you slept over like I said then I would have made you lunch, no problem. Now you’re spending big bucks on ew cafeteria food…._

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_It’s like $3 max, but next time I’ll let you make me breakfast in bed ok?_

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_Oh god that sounded so … I’m sorry…._

 

**_To Theo:_ **

_No, I’m gonna!!! Shh. :) :) :)_

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_:D_

 

Liam thinks sending a heart emoji is maybe a bit soon and he doesn’t trust himself not to send an entire string of them until Theo gets the point, so he leaves it at that.

 

“Hey… hey wakey wakey. I’m going now.” he shakes Jaymie’s shoulder.

 

“Mmph” is all Jaymie answers, sitting up with his eyes still shut but he waves Liam off. He spares no time and darts back up his floor.

 

He’s got a master plan, that requires immediate action.

 

* * *

 

“... right very good.” Theo writes the correct answer on the board behind him, and turns to the class again, “Now, in what exact part of the cell does DNA live? Jess?”

 

“Uh…”

 

“No. ‘Uh’ is the incorrect answer. Sean?”

 

“The nucleus.”

 

“The nucleus is correct.” They stare at him, “Write it down. Where are your pens?? Write it down! I’m basically giving you the answers for Friday's test! Come on guys.”

 

He giggles a bit when they start scrambling around while he turns to write that answer down too. He is practically restraining himself not to check his phone, it’s insane, totally and completely. But, he tells himself the sooner he gets his day done with the sooner he can talk to Liam, maybe even see him.

 

He starts the next question, “Can DNA ever leave the nucleus?”

 

“No!” the whole class pipes up at that one, and makes him smile.

 

“Yeah. Good job. DNA can never leave the cell.” this time they write it down. He continues to explain the workings of the cell, where proteins are made, how it gets from one place to another. He’s in the middle of explaining difference between DNA and RNA, when there’s a soft knock on his door. His heart nearly floors full speed when he sees Liam standing there.

 

“Uh, I want you guys to read through subsection eight while I step out. Next period will be on this exclusively. There are twenty-five of you, and twenty-five bullet points. Get studying!”

 

He makes sure they’ve all got their books open and their heads are down before he steps out, his face breaking into an instant grin.

 

“Hi!” he says and pulls Liam a little to the side, out of view of the students.

 

“Uhm, hi…” Liam scratches the back of his neck and looks down, cheeks turning pink.

 

Theo swipes at a stray hair across Liam’s forehead, “Not that I’m complaining in any way, but what are you doing here?”

 

“Hm, I’m… you, uh… You look really nice… wow.” he almost looks away, but Theo catches his face, tipping his jaw up so their eyes lock, and he smiles.

 

“Hi…”

 

Liam, now less flustered, exhales and says, “Hello…”

 

“How you doing?” His thumb rubs over the line of Liam’s jaw.

 

Liam holds up a small white lunch bag. “I brought you this. But like, this is so dumb... to interrupt your class for this… I… I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking…”

 

“You brought me lunch??”

 

He wants to die at Liam’s shy smile, at the pink of his cheeks and how wonderfully out of place he looks in his faded, torn jeans and ‘spank me’ t-shirt in the middle of a school. Theo adores him beyond anything in that moment.

 

“Yeah… I just… I don’t know. It’s…”

 

“It is perfect, thank you.” he leans down and places a quick kiss to Liam’s hot cheek. “How much do I owe you?”

 

Liam laughs sheepishly, “Oh, no. I made it. You can pay me in kind.”

 

“Oh wow… You’re, uh… you’re amazing, you know that right?”

 

“Nah. But I'm not gonna keep you away. They seem like a handful.” Liam nods to the class. “Enjoy that, hope it's somewhat edible.”

 

“Even if this is a live lobster, I'll still eat it.”

 

Liam grimaces playfully and starts backing away, hands raised.

 

“It's not, is it??”

 

“Hey, don't look at me… it's your problem now!”

 

“Wait!” Theo closes the gap between them again, and grabs hold of Liam’s wrist before he gets too far, “I've got the apartment to myself tonight, for a while at least… wanna come over?”

 

Liam nods before the words are out, “You cooking for me?”

 

“If you have a death wish, yes sure.” Liam laughs at him, “I am fantastic at ordering in though. Tacos and wine?”

 

“Sounds great. Let me know when you’re home, I’ll be right over.”

 

“Okay.” and then Liam heads back out. Theo tries his hardest not to focus on how his ass moves in the jeans when he walks. _Tries_ , being the operative word.

 

He’s fully aware that he hasn’t stopped smiling once, that he was reluctant to let Liam’s hand go and that he feels lightheaded in the best way. Liam went through the effort to make him lunch and bring it over because he didn’t want Theo eating gross cafeteria food. No one has ever done something like that for him before but he knows it means a great deal in every way. Liam turns at the door and waves at him before leaving and he’s suddenly inspired for the rest of the day.

 

He breezes through it, gets his next two classes ahead of schedule as well as getting them to understand analogous structures and to take comprehensive notes on cell division. He’s beyond pleased with his efforts for the morning when the bell rings for lunch.

 

There’s a carefully packed turkey and mustard sandwich in the bag, it’s even marked as such with a sticky note in Liam’s handwriting, making Theo smile as he unpacks it. In fact, everything is marked. The chocolate bar is marked “chocolate because you’re the sweetest.” and a bottle of peach ice tea marked “peach, because I like your butt.” That has him blushing, thankful that he’s alone, as he takes out the last item: a packet of salt and vinegar chips marked “because I’m salty that I can’t be with you today.”

 

He laughs out loud at that, totally in awe of Liam. He literally can’t wrap his head around the fact that Liam is so into him. He throws his feet up on the desk and starts digging into the sandwich (it’s fantastic) and thinks about the times he felt so insignificant around people like Liam, hot guys who just glanced over him as if he wasn’t even there. And now, well now the hottest, sweetest and funniest one of them all, only has eyes for Theo. Now, the hot guy is bringing him lunch, stuttering in his presence and said he's got a nice butt.

 

**_To LiamD:_ **

_BEST. LUNCH. EVER. thank you :)_

 

* * *

 

When Theo gets home just after five he’s surprised that he doesn’t even feel as tired as he usually does, and that’s mostly because his nerves are buzzing with excitement. Brett’s in the shower, singing his own rendition of This Ain’t a Scene - his go to shower song, Theo can’t help but sing along too. He shrugs off his jacket, careful to place the sticky notes Liam wrote for him on the counter (Yes, of course he’s keeping it), and begins straightening up quickly before he tells Liam to come over.

 

 

A little while later Brett steps out of his room looking spectacular in a black three-piece suit, hair combed back and smelling divine, and he’s just in time for the doorbell to ring. Theo’s sure by the look on Brett’s face that both their hearts jumped ridiculously at the sound.

 

Brett grins at him, “These boys are gonna be the end of us, huh?”

 

“You have no idea.” Theo sighs and moves to open the door.

 

“Mine or yours?” Brett asks, tugging at his jacket.

 

“Both!” Theo exclaims, and is met with an equally ravishing Mason and at his side Liam, who looks amazing beyond compare, even dressed in only loose sweats and a long-sleeved t-shirt.

 

Brett swoops in and greets Mason with a kiss that seems to linger a while, they make quite the pair in the matching suits. Liam’s eyes however, are glued to Theo only, intently.

 

“Hi again!” says Liam and holds up two Taco Bell bags. “Hope you don’t mind. Got it on the way, there’s chicken and veg and beef. Didn’t know what you’d like.”

 

Theo grins, taking the packets, “I feel bad though. I’ll owe you yeah?” and then he leans down to kiss Liam. He thinks he’ll probably never get used to the way Liam almost literally seeps into his body, just fuses into him, the hands around his middle pulling him closer. Warm and secure and deliriously content.

 

Liam pulls away marginally, to breathe, and whispers “Told you I only take payment in kind… and you’re doing a pretty good at the instalments.” his eyes are still closed and he’s smiling. Theo is one hundred percent sure he’s in a dream or a coma or some alternate reality.

 

“Ehrm… excuse me…” Brett grumbles sarcastically behind them, and once they turn to face him, he stands next to mason, upright, and grins really wide, “How do we look?”

 

“Well, Mason looks like he’s gonna pick up a real nice guy tonight.” Theo teases and starts unpacking the take-out boxes on the coffee table and switches on his laptop for Netflix.

 

They chuckle behind Theo, but Brett is suddenly right behind him, “No, really buddy, how do I look?” he looks nervous to be honest, and small beads of perspiration are forming on his forehead.

 

Theo stops and frowns, glances over at Liam and Mason chatting in the kitchen, “You look good. What’s your problem?”

 

“I’m gonna ask him tonight.” Brett hisses under his breath like he’s scared of his own words, eyes wide.

 

“You’re gonna…” Theo’s eyebrows climb, “What exactly are you gonna ask him, Bread?” and he’s thinking, Jesus, it’s early for marriage. It’s really fucking early, but he’ll fully support Brett in this after at least trying to talk him out of it. Why does it feel like his teenage son just told him he’ll be a grandpa??

 

Brett makes a face at him, like he knows exactly where Theo’s mind went, “Ew! No, you nerd! I’m gonna ask him to like, date me, but... all the time.”

 

He can’t help that he cackles at that, “You mean to be your boyfriend?” he whispers so he’s on Brett’s level of mystery.

 

His giant, idiot, softy of a best friend squirms at the word, and makes a sound that could maybe possibly be a yes. “You stupid tank.” he says fondly and hands Brett a napkin for his sweaty forehead.

 

Even that seems to make Brett’s nerves jolt, “Why am I a tank now??”

 

“Because you’re all big and tough, like a water tank, but inside…” Theo shakes his head playfully, “It’s just liquid, just mush.”

 

“Listen, fuck you. What’s he gonna say? Will he say yes??”

 

Before Theo can tell him to have some chill, Mason chips in and tells him it’s time to go, show starts in an hour. With that the two suits leave, one blissfully unaware of the amount of awkwardness that is about to hit him, and the other one sweating bullets.

 

“Finally!” Liam says and joins Theo in the lounge, “I am starving!” he makes himself at home on the couch.

 

“You mind if I just get into something comfy really quick?”

 

“Nope.” Liam’s already digging in, legs folded in under him. He looks adorable. Theo hurries and changes into sweats too, and one of his new t-shirts before he joins Liam on the couch. He hits play on the latest movie Netflix has to offer and they eat in silence, knees touching, while they watch.

 

It’s only when he leans in and makes Liam taste his custom-built taco with extra mayo, that the atmosphere shifts and he has to try with every ounce of strength in him to not turn this into a cliché Netflix and Chill evening.

 

Liam bites down, and that in itself is pretty cute because whatever Liam does is sexy - a thing Theo’s is slowly getting accustomed to - but the problem (is it really?) comes when a fat blob of mayo escapes and dribbles down Liam’s lip, onto his chin. That’s where everything inside Theo stutters to a grinding halt, his eyes fixed on the white smudge on Liam’s perfect lips and his tongue poking out ever so slightly in an attempt to clean it up.

 

He must know too. Liam must know what this looks like, it’s so obvious and he’s not trying very hard to lick it up, Theo’s kind of thankful because he might just leak right through his sweats if Liam did that. They can’t stay like this forever, with… with whatever this is, hanging between them, so Theo does the only logical thing he can think of.

 

He reaches up and pushes the mayo back in Liam’s mouth. Where it belongs.... _Christ._

 

And why he thought that would be better than Liam licking it up, he doesn’t know. It’s not. It’s way worse because he feels his dick pulse at the innuendo. And when Liam’s lips close around his finger, sucking softly, he’s fucking _done_. Done.

 

“Jesus…” he pulls his finger out with a pop, leaving Liam’s bottom lip wet, inviting.

 

Liam however has other ideas, he’s in Theo’s lap so fast he can barely blink. In one swift move he swipes Theo’s taco out of his hand and puts it down, and then rests his full weight down on Theo, thighs caging his waist in.

 

He swallows hard because Liam’s eyes are dark now as he comes closer, instead of kissing Theo he licks teasingly over his lips, making Theo’s fingers come up and curl into his sides to tug him closer. And then it’s a proper kiss once Liam’s lips crash into his. Hungry and deep.

 *

Before he can stop himself, his hands slide up Liam’s shirt, feeling the hard planes of his chest under his fingers, feeling his muscles contract at the touch. He wants Liam to move, so he hooks an arm around the back of his shoulder and pulls down. Liam seems to get the hint because he shifts his hips forward and drags his fingers through Theo’s hair as their dicks brush together through the material. It’s an instant shiver inducing move and Theo lets out a soft, shaky whimper at the feeling.

 

“Okay?” Liam manages cautiously, before he drives forward again.

 

“Yeah… again.” Theo says and this time Liam rocks down harder at the command of Theo’s fingers, creating more friction, and they both moan at that, giving no notion to stop, so Liam carries on grinding until they’re both seconds away and panting.

* 

Liam’s phone vibrates violently beside them on the coffee table and their heads jerk in that direction, faces flushed and mouths parted, Theo watches the name Boss Lady come up on the screen as it rings. Liam groans.

 

“Oh, come on!” he drops his head on Theo’s shoulder.

 

“Uhm… you wanna get it?”

 

“My mom…” Liam explains.

 

“Oh! You should definitely get it!”

 

“Yeah but…” he looks down to their laps, smirking breathlessly.

 

Theo laughs and leans sideways to grab the phone and smiles, “Liam, answer your mom.”

 

He has to giggle, despite his aching erection, at Liam’s huffing before he answers politely “Hi mom.” and slinks off the kitchen while adjusting his sweats in the front. Theo fixes himself too, listening to Liam explain that he’s on a date and then answer a string of questions ranging from Theo’s name, his age, what he does, _‘yes mom’_ and _‘no mom’_ , and ‘ _oh my god mom, what?!’_ which really makes Theo laugh.

 

Needless to say, that when he returns about ten minutes and a conversation about his pregnant cousin later, any and all signs of their boners have disappeared.

 

“I’m sorry.” Liam breathes out, flopping down next to Theo.

 

“That’s fine.” he smiles, reaching for Liam’s hand.

 

“Wait…” Liam says, looking at the screen, suddenly remembering the movie. “Why is she kissing that Kavinsky dude now?”

 

Theo shrugs, “Coz he’s hot?”

 

“Oh really??”

 

“Hm.” Theo nods meekly before Liam attacks him and flattens him on the couch, slides down so he’s next to Theo, pressed warm to his side. They just smile at each other for a few seconds before Liam places a soft kiss to his cheek and turns in Theo’s arms, toward the screen.

 

And that's how they stay for at least another two movies, Theo's sure Liam drifted off a few times but when the current movie’s credits roll Liam shuffles back around to face Theo, sleepy and looking soft.

 

“You're so warm.” Liam whispers nuzzling in under Theo's chin, his soft golden hairs tickling Theo’s nose.

 

He strokes down Liam's back in long, smooth sweeps and kisses the top of his head, “Hey Li…”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Thanks for lunch today, that was really nice of you.”

 

“No problem. You just let me know when you need lunch again.” he tips his head up for a kiss that Theo happily obliges to, and feels Liam stroking thoughtfully over his belly right where his waistband meets his hips, and while his tongue dips lazily into Theo's mouth, his pinkie flips at the elastic of his peeking boxers. Theo’s full on wishing Liam would just slide his hand in there already because his dick is twitching in response anyway, beginning to wake up fully again.

 

They're mid kiss when the front door opens, and they hear Brett and Mason giggle, sounding a bit tipsy, but really happy.

 

Liam wants to get up, but Theo pulls him back down, gestures with a finger of his lips for Liam to be quiet. They aren't visible from the door and if Brett’s going ask Mason out right now, Theo doesn't want to break the moment and cause his friend to lose his already thin nerve.

 

“ _So, uh… listen… I've been wanting to ask if you, uh…_ ”

 

Liam gives Theo a quizzical look, amused. Theo just winks. They lay on top of each other not making a sound.

 

“ _You look pale…_ ” says Mason, and Brett clears his throat a second time.

 

“ _Uhm_ ” he stutters again, “ _Do you wanna like be my boyf-… my uh guy, you know… my dude, uhm permanently? Maybe? If you wanna?_ ”

 

Liam almost snorts out loud, but Theo slaps a hand over his mouth, and another behind his head to keep him still, trying not to laugh himself. Brett’s just one big teddy bear, he realises.

 

“ _Are you… asking me out?_ ” Mason asks, and Liam rolls his eyes, like duh! Not giggling is getting increasingly harder. Mase follows quickly with “ _Oh my god yes!!”_

 

“They’re idiots” Theo whispers, listening to the fabric of their suits rustle, he thinks now is probably a great time to announce their presence before Brett ravishes Mason on the counter top. He lets Liam go and they sit up, simultaneously clapping for the happy pair in sarcastic adoration. Brett flushes bright red and tosses his jacket at the two.

 

“You could have said something, Theo!”

 

“Then _you_ wouldn’t have. Did you a favour.”

 

“What the hell were you two doing anyway? Did you mess on the couch??” Brett’s undoing his tie.

 

Theo wraps around Liam again, squeezing his thighs around Liam’s waist, and he smiles, “No… but maybe next time.” Liam beams at that and practically devours his mouth in the warmest, sloppiest kiss.

 

“Gross!!” Brett shouts while dragging Mason to his room.

 

 

Definitely next time.

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a little while.
> 
> Smut is indicated with a * and follows through to the end, for those who choose not to read that.

It’s been a shit week to say the least. Theo’s been up late almost every night, grading papers, preparing material for finals only to have 20% of the class fail dismally at the test. He’d given them notes, taken them through each and every little bump they may run into during exams, he’d even given them his private email to reach out at anytime. As long as they understood and passed.

 

They didn’t. And as a result Mrs. Martin had been on his back about wanting to see his schedules and questioning if the students had been thoroughly prepared and informed beforehand. Took everything in him not to go “ _duh bitch_ ” but he held out and smiled politely, flipping her off under the desk, like the adult he is.

 

So, when a freakishly good-looking guy with the bluest eyes in the universe called, complaining about an equally shitty week and was insistent they go out and bury their stress at the bottom of Caribbean cocktails, Theo didn’t even hesitate.

 

He hasn’t seen Liam all week, he’s been busy with a few on-location shoots, which Theo can’t wait to see the photos of. Right now while he’s getting dressed he’s trying real hard not to think of the few selfies Liam sent him, or these pants are going to be another level of uncomfortable. But holy shit, the one of him shirtless in a fluffy white robe, that one’s been stuck in Theo’s head. And Liam’s hair dangling in his eyes… and his cocky little grin, like he knows exactly what he’s doing. And what Theo sent him after that… and what Liam replied with. Oh god…

 

“Do I wanna know why you’re staring at the wall with your pants around your thighs?”

 

Theo jumps at Brett’s voice, pulls the pants up completely, “Uh, Jesus. You can’t just…” he waves airily at the door “appear out of nowhere Bread.”

 

Brett grins, “I _live_ here buddy.”

 

He slips a black golf shirt on, “This is all your fault you know! I’m going nuts and it’s all your fault!”

“Yeah? How’d you figure that one?” Brett leaves for the kitchen, begins dinner when he gets there.

 

Theo follows, pulling his shoes on in an awkward little hop. He answers Brett, “You made me ask for dick pics Brett! Me, a sophisticated human being, would never have asked for dick pics! Like a goddamn fuckboy!”

 

“You didn’t _ask_ him for dick pics Theo. You just said you wished the camera dropped a few inches and then you ran off into the bedroom to hide.” Brett laughs at the memory. “It was hardly fuckboy worthy.”

 

“Still! I can’t believe I let you talk me into that!”

 

Brett cracks open an egg in a pan, and snorts, “He sent them didn’t he?”

 

“You’re fucking awful.” Theo checks his hair in the mirror, swoops it up messily and leaves it like that. If he’s lucky, he’ll get his hair totally fucked up by the end of the night. God knows he needs it.

 

The butter sizzling up in the pan suddenly draws Theo’s attention and Theo realises he’s been staring into space again. Should probably start calling that ‘into the Liam void’. He worries that he’s bordering on obsessed with this guy. Liam is on his mind every second of the day and night, but he literally can’t stop it. When he closes his eyes there’s only Liam’s toothy grin and glittering blue eyes, when he dreams it’s always of Liam’s hands on him and his lips driving him to the brink of insanity.

 

Brett clears his throat, “Well?”

 

“Well what?”

 

“Did he send his dick??”

 

Theo goes red, tries to get his phone and keys into his pocket, but it’s clear he’s just fumbling to avoid Brett’s gaze. He stops and exhales, lets that fucking image sink into his brain again- Liam in the robe and the ones he sent after that at Theo’s request which were angled significantly lower down, showing off the beautiful lines of his body, and one of the sharp downward arrow of Liam’s hips displaying only a scramble of dark hairs, and then the final one of his half hard length between his legs - smooth and tanned and pretty.  Fuck, he’s never called a cock pretty in his life, nor has he wanted one to melt in his mouth as much as he wants this one to. Theo twitches at the thought. “God yes. He sent four fucking glorious ones. Okay? You happy?”

 

Brett smiles so wide Theo thinks his face might split open. The asshole. “My boy!!”

 

“Just shhh okay.” and if he blushes any more than he already is, his head will explode, so this conversation needs to _end_. “Haven’t seen him all week and kind of don’t want to have a boner when I do, so...”

 

Theos phone vibrates and Liam’s name pops up on the screen.

 

**_From LiamD:_ **

_Stay over tonight?_

 

Well there goes the no boner plan then.

 

* * *

 

The place he meets Liam at is a Jamaican bar slash lounge slash restaurant.  It’s cozy yet lively, and the food smells divine. Liam’s booked them a corner table away from too much noise and he’s already ordered two massive colorful cocktails when Theo gets there.

 

“Ahhh!” Liam gets up the instant he sees Theo, stretches his arms out wide and what else is Theo going to do but bury into the embrace of Liam’s gigantic arms. “I missed you!” Liam says into his neck, breath warm on Theo’s skin.

 

“Fuck I’ve missed you too!” Theo pulls back and plants a wet kiss on Liam’s lips, watches him smile while they’re still connected.  

 

They sit down just as the waitress brings a round of shots, and a basket of bread rolls. Theo’s mouth waters, and he’s not denying that it has more to do with Liam in his tight dark green Henley, but he _is_ starving and doesn’t wait much longer to dig in. He thinks they’re past that awkward phase of their…. Relationship? Is it even? Are they even dating?

 

Before panic sets in about that Liam shoves a small glass full of golden liquid at him, “Bottoms up!” he yelps and swallows the shot down.  

 

“Bad week huh?” Theo downs his shot too.

 

“More annoying than anything else I guess.”

 

“What happened?”

 

Liam sighs and breaks off a bread roll, “Been busy with the winter Vogue edition. It just takes forever, and it’s really tiring. Working with drama queens.”

 

“Wow, Vogue huh.” Theo smiles a little, remembering, as he takes in Liam’s defined jaw and flawless skin, that the guy he’s seeing is a frikken model.

 

A faint blush paints Liam‘s cheeks and he scoffs, “Got lucky with that one, but yeah.”

 

Theo grins looking down. There’s a burn in his chest, a delighted warm feeling he gets every time Liam looks at him, even more when he folds in Theo’s presence the way he does.

 

“At least you didn’t have almost your entire class fail a test they literally had the answers to.”

 

“Oh is this ‘my pain is worse than your pain’ time huh?” Liam grins and waves the waitress over.

 

“What no… I didn’t…”

 

“No, we’re gonna do this right!” he has a fiery twinkle in his eye that Theo has grown to know as playfulness. Liam turns to the waitress  - a pretty and slim dark-skinned girl sporting long dreadlocks - “Ari, this is Theo, my uh…” Liam blinks between the two of them, looking a little awkward. Apparently Theo’s not the only one perplexed by what they are. “My date.” he says finally, shooting a bright grin to Theo. “Theo, this is my friend Ari. She works here.”

 

The waitress, Ari, turns to Theo and smiles and greets with a thick Jamaican accent, “Nice to meet you, he told me you’d be coming around.” and again Liam flushes pink.

 

“Hello, nice to meet you too.” he replies politely and shakes her hand. “How do you guys know each other?”

 

“Oh, I just met her now, when I came in.”

 

It’s cute how he makes friends with everyone, not hard to believe since he’s a pretty likeable guy. Must be how his friendship with Jaymie started too.

 

“He’s a talker. We don’t get that a lot.” she smiles, “It’s nice.”

 

Liam returns her smile and says, “Can you bring us four more shots Ari, we apparently have a debate to settle.”

 

“No problem hun. Anything else?”

 

“We’re good for now thanks.”

 

While she’s gone they dig into the bread rolls. Theo tries to ignore the white powder from the roll that somehow ended up on Liam’s nose but it’s utterly adorable so he can’t really help that he stares, and Liam in turn doesn’t miss the way Theo looks at him.

 

“What?” he asks with a shy grin.

 

“Nothing.” Theo leans forward and wipes the powder off, “You look nice.”

 

He smiles at Theo with one stuffed cheek and mumbles around the bread, “You too. Like your shirt.”

 

Just then Ari returns with a tray of shots and two water bottles, places it in front of them, “I’ll be back with the menus in a bit yeah? You boys enjoy yourselves.”

 

“Thanks Ari!” Liam says when she leaves with a nod. “Okay!” he dusts his hands off on his jeans and hands them each a shot, “So… you wanna play who’s had it worse? Let’s play.”

 

Theo chuckles, “I mean, it’s guaranteed that I’ll win, but sure.” he nods at Liam,  “You start.”

 

“Fine.” Liam squares his shoulders and rests his elbows on the table, stares right at Theo, “Loser takes a shot.”

 

“Well I mean how are you gonna determine who the loser is?”

 

“Shh, don’t get technical.”

 

Theo curls his fingers around his shot and narrows his eyes at Liam. “Seems objective but fine. Go ahead.”

 

“Okay. At a shoot, at a construction site, with a bunch of other models, they made us stand on the edge of this sandbank, you know so the sun would catch us just right or whatever. Anyway, I stepped too far back and I fell in a hole.”

 

Theo snorts, “How deep was the hole?”

 

“Not that deep but because I’m short, they needed to lower a ladder to get me out.” Liam says and shrugs.

 

“Oh my god.” Theo purses his lips trying not to laugh, but that’s impossible with Liam’s serious little frown and honest to god offended expression.

 

“Top that.” Liam muses like it’s a given that he’s won.

 

“Fine. My sister convinced me there were evil people with gas masks living behind the mirrors and I avoided any reflective surfaces for two years.”

 

“So? All kids are scared of evil shit. That’s not…”

 

“I was fifteen.”

 

Liam breaks out in a wild cackle, “What?!”  he turning red and his eyes water, Theo can only shake his head and chuckle. Making Liam laugh will always be his favourite thing to do, and quite possibly remain one of his favourite sounds ever.

 

“Well shit, I don’t know who wins this round for the biggest dumbass…”

 

The old guy behind them pipes up, “Ya’ll idiots, the both of you. Drink!”

 

That has them both in stitches, almost folding over the table. They eventually manage to take the shot and then a long sip of their cocktail to ease the burn of it.

 

Liam rubs his face trying to gain composure again. “Phew! Okay, okay. My best friend and I went out drinking and got chased all over the neighborhood for two hours by what we, at the time, believed to be a wolf.”

 

“What was it?”

 

“A husky puppy.”

 

“Oh wow! Don’t know if the time I got lost in the underground sewers and they had to send a search team out for me actually beats that one.”

 

“Drank!!! Both of ya’ll.” the old guy takes a swig of beer, “Dumbasses.”

 

Again, they laugh so hard they nearly end up under the table, then the shots are downed and large sips of cocktails are taken, another round ordered plus a big basket of chips and wings. The guy behind them is named Darrell and old army vet, Theo knows this because Liam crawled over to his booth about one hour into the ‘game’ and introduced himself, thanked Darrell for refereeing said game and bought him a few beers to further express his gratitude. Darrell is pretty cool.

 

Needless to say they ended up slightly tipsy, neither having won the game but they celebrated like it was a victory, anyway. So, after more than enough shots and a few cocktails and sneaky kisses later they did the responsible thing and called a cab to take them home.

 

When they finally step outside to wait for their cab, the wind is a little chilly on their booze warmed skin and their faces still bear the lines of the smiles they wore all night. Liam’s body is firm and cozy and wards off the breeze as he stands pressed to Theo’s chest, arms around his middle and his lips playfully teasing at Theo’s. He looks more love drunk than actual drunk.

 

Even the bumpy cab ride doesn’t throw them off, the flames burn higher than they ever have before and Theo knows, he fucking _knows_ , it’ll end in more than just a goodnight kiss this time. Liam’s mouth is like sin itself, and Theo’s all but repenting, in fact he’s begging for more. His hands are everywhere on the boy, never quite getting enough of what they touch and Liam giggles between kisses - which really just drives Theo wild. Liam is like an opiate, addicting and calming, and Theo wants to consume all of him all at once.

 

* * *

 

They stumble out of the elevator still attached, limbs scrambling for keys and something to hold on to. Liam giggles when he bumps over a vase beside the door, it doesn’t deter him from the kissing though. The door is barely open when Theo starts tugging at Liam’s shirt, wanting to see the perfect contours for himself, feel them, taste them even- without having to fantasize over a picture.

 

Liam obliges, peels the shirt over his head and there he stands in front of Theo, bare form the waist up, blinking, breathing quickly. “Hey…” he smiles.

 

“Well damn…” Theo slumps back against the wall to admire Liam fully. He really is fucking gorgeous. It might just be the low light of the hallway, or the streaks of moonlight that filter through the window which hit Liam at precisely the right angle to make him appear otherworldly, but Theo can’t look away, doesn’t want to either. Not this time. “You are… you’re beautiful Liam.” surely there must be another word to describe him, but brain functionality is limited right now. The functionality of _other_ things, however, is _pristine_.

 

Liam prowls closer, his deep-cut hips rippling in the low jeans as he closes the few inches, “And you are literally everything I’ve always dreamed of, I swear.” He says low, a hand coming up to Theo’s mouth, his thumb running over his lips.

 

Theo shudders at that, quite visibly too because Liam smiles and leans up to kiss him again. The movements of his hands grow more demanding, rougher, pressing harder into Theo’s hip, and his mouth doesn’t leave an inch of Theo’s untouched, his tongue  thorough and hungry. Theo lets himself touch Liam’s sides, fingers gradually sliding up higher until he reaches his defined pecs, he hesitates only a second during the heated kissing to let his fingers roll over Liam’s nipples. He’ll be forever grateful that he did because Liam whines into his open mouth and holy fuck it’s the most delectable sound. So, he repeats the movement, again and again.

 

“Theo…”

*****

“Fuck…” he tilts Liam’s head back, starts working wet kisses down his neck and back up, then over the sharp point of his jawbone. The more he does that, the more Liam starts rubbing against him, and he realizes they’re both rock hard.

 

Liam pulls on his hair, arches his body up so their hips grind, “Theo, please…”

 

He groans, curling in on Liam as he relishes the friction, “What do you want.” his own body drives forward, urging for more.

 

“ _You_. Anything. Everything.” Liam pants and starts tugging at Theo’s shirt. And there he freezes a bit, he’s not quite ready to be naked in front of this Adonis, even if said Adonis seems to worship his chubby body. Theo’s just not there yet. Liam notices but doesn’t push it, makes nothing of it, and Theo’s not about to let body issues kill his boner, so he grabs Liam’s ass and picks him up.

 

“Oh god…” Liam yelps and wraps those strong thighs around Theo’s waist. He’s surprisingly light, Theo thinks, which is fantastic for certain positions.

 

They only make it to the couch where Theo lowers Liam, stays as close as he can and before he loses his nerve, he rocks his hips forward and grinds against Liam’s erection, his eyes shoot up to check for any signs to stop, but Liam’s just biting his beautiful lips and panting beneath him so he carries on.

 

Their bodies move amazingly together and to Theo everything feels like it’s on fucking fire, especially when Liam’s hands slip into the back of his jeans and squeezes.

 

He gets himself to draw back a little, catch a breath, “God… Liam…” he rests his forehead against Liam’s, their heaving chests battling for air. What the fuck is he doing? This is all moving so fast. Isn’t it? What if Liam doesn’t…

 

“Hey…” Liam tips his chin up so their eyes lock.

 

Theo grins, flushed and lightheaded.

 

“Don’t stop.” Liam says, and he keeps the eye contact to make sure Theo understands good and well what he’s implying. _He wants this._ To make his point even clearer, he reaches down and starts unbuckling his jeans and Theo’s heart goes flying. This is fucking happening.

 

Liam reveals luxurious gold and white boxers with an impressive bulge straining inside. “Fuck. Really? You want…”

 

“Uurg Theo! Yes!” Liam starts palming himself through his boxers, pushing his hips up, whining with eyes closed and Theo fucking _loses_ it.

 

He cups his hand over Liam’s, “This,” he says squeezing gently to get Liam’s attention, “is my job from now on okay?” and then he kisses Liam’s parted mouth, softly on the corner before licking inside.

 

Liam draws his hand out from between them slowly and smirks, “Absolutely.” he bucks up again when it’s just Theo’s hand on him. Theo doesn’t wait anymore - mainly because he’s about to come in his jeans - he reaches down and unbuckles himself too, leans in to kiss Liam again. He never can seem to get enough of that mouth.

 

He gets a little help from Liam pushing his own pants down and can’t seem to get rid of them fast enough, but he does eventually, both his and Liam’s so they’re left in only their boxers. Liam pulls his down and wiggles out of it, Theo follows. Everything is so hot and hungry in that moment he can hardly see, but he knows Liam’s thick and heavy when he grabs his dick and starts stroking.

 

He’s not going to last and judging by the pink flush all the way up Liam’s neck and the quick juts of his hips into Theo’s hand, neither is he.

 

Theo breathes out harshly at the sight of Liam’s dick blurting out pre-come, length hard and thick in his fist, “Oh fuck…” his own cock feels like it’s clenching for attention, it’s actually starting to ache but he doesn’t stop, keeps jerking.

 

“That feels so good, don’t stop.” Liam’s hand finds his hair, tangles in it while the other one reaches down and slips inside Theo’s boxers, cupping his balls and caressing them gently. Theo’s body shivers throughout at Liam’s touch.

 

Liam writhes under him, pulls him down by the hair so they can kiss and once their lips connect, Liam comes. He makes the faintest moaning sounds against Theo’s lips as he finishes, his hand curling around strands of hair. It’ll probably hurt if Theo weren’t so turned on.

 

He kisses Liam as his solid body goes boneless in the aftermath. Theo thinks for a second that’s it. They’re done. But Liam pushes up, coaxing Theo into a sitting position and straddles his lap. Theo realises two things then- one: Liam is completely naked and in his lap and two: Liam is about to make him come and that’s going to happen embarrassingly fast.

 

There’s a warm hand in his neck, tilting his head up and he blushes furiously at this boy in his lap whose beauty is far beyond anything Theo has ever seen. He meets Liam’s blue eyes and swallows down hard, it’s almost too intense right then when Liam starts jerking him. Easily better than anything he’s ever had before, that might have a lot to do with the fact that he’s irrevocably in love with this guy.

 

“This okay?” Liam whispers, it’s not like there’s anyone there but the moment seems kind of consecrated, special somehow. Maybe it’s just the way Liam looks at him.

 

“This is perfect.” he gasps back, digging his nails into Liam’s bare thighs as he watches his perfect body work on top of him.

 

Liam leans down and rests his forehead against Theo’s, his hand working faster around him and he says with a ragged voice, “ _You_. You’re fucking perfect, you’re so, so beautiful Theo… I… You’re incredible.” At the praise, like a perfectly timed machine, Theo loses control and comes so hard, his thighs start twitching, shaking and he’s sure where he’s squeezing Liam there’ll be marks the next day.

 

He only catches a brief flash of the surprise on Liam’s face, the slant of realization in his grin before his eyes force themselves to close as the fire of his orgasm blazes over him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading guys!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Liam's POV for a change.  
> Smut indicated with * if you want to skip

Liam wakes up first, early like he always does but he’s got a warm, deep breathing body pressed to his side that he immediately curls back into. Doesn’t matter that they’re sweating where their tangled limbs touch.

He can’t get Theo’s face out of his mind, more specifically the look on his face after the stuff they did the night before. Jesus. If he could have that image painted and hung all over his apartment like wallpaper he would. He tries to stop with those thoughts because all he wants to do is roll around in these sheets with Theo all day, but he doesn’t want him to think that’s all he’s here for. Theo’s that forever type of guy and Liam will make him so frikken happy he’ll never want to leave. And what makes people happier than French toast, he thinks.

He sneaks out of bed, pulls on some sweats and heads to the kitchen. The island is a mess of magazines, candles, keys and other trinkets, barely space to sit, so he clears up a few things and turns the radio on. He doesn’t know the first thing about French toast but he’s making it for the naked dude in his bed, so it’ll be fine.

While he waits for the stove to get warm, he shoots a text off to Jaymie, just a gif of Geoffrey Butler dancing like a crazy person. Should get the message across without kissing and telling. He’s just so fucking excited.

The eggs and milk go in a jug and he mixes it up, grabs a pan and the loaf of bread. His phone vibrates with Jaymie’s multiple response gifs. First, it’s Drake slow clapping, then Meryl Streep screaming into her hands, and finally Rue Paul doing a very admirable bend and snap.

**_To Jaymie:_ **

_ Shut up. _

**_From Jaymie:_ **

_ Get IT!!!! _

Liam laughs and dunks a piece of bread into the egg mixture, he’s sure it’s not supposed to be as soaked as it is, and there’s also supposed to be cinnamon involved somewhere, he just can’t remember the order it’s all supposed to go in. “It’s fine, it’s fine. I can do this.” he mumbles to himself. There’s a loud sizzle when he drops the piece of bread into the pan, maybe the plate is on too high. He turns it down a few notches but now he’s just staring at goopy egg mixture sticking to the pan and it’s not getting done, so he turns it back up. A few minutes later the bread burns and it’s just nasty smelling smoke and black gunk in the pan.

“Fuck!”  he starts swatting the smoke away, inevitably making it worse. He wonders if Theo will care if he feeds him cereal and juice instead. He’s debating whether to call Jaymie for help or to bring up some breakfast from the corner bakery when a pair of arms wrap around him from behind and warm lips press to the back of his neck.

“Morning.” Theo’s voice is sleepy and cracks when he speaks and it’s easily the sexiest thing Liam’s ever heard.

He leans back and turns so he can kiss the side of Theo’s face, “Hi.”

“If you wanted me out you could have just said so instead of burning your apartment down…”

Liam chuckles, slips his fingers between Theo’s where they rest on his abdomen, “I was trying to make you breakfast. Not really my forte.”

“Come on, move over.” Theo kisses the top of his shoulder and scoots him up so he’s standing in front of the stove, “Let me.”

He watches as Theo takes a paper towel, wipes the pan, tosses the burnt bread and starts all over. Smooth and graceful. Liam’s kind of amazed.

“You’re good at cooking huh?” Liam muses and leans with his hip against the counter, arms folded. Theo gives him a quick once over, eyes skimming over Liam’s bulging muscles since he’s still shirtless. “Can a guy get any luckier than me?” He’s loving how puffy and sleepy Theo still looks as he shoots him a tired little smile.

“Yeah, you can be me.” he says and dips the bread in the egg mixture, flipping it over quickly.

“You’re smooth Mr Raeken.” Liam leans in and kisses the top of Theo’s bicep then slowly curls around to his back, there he slips his hands under Theo’s shirt at his sides and nips down his back through his shirt and feels how his skin breaks out in goosebumps.

“If you keep doing that there’s going to be a pile of burnt French toast and two hungry dudes, Liam.”

“Then maybe you can feed me something else instead.” he says as he slips a finger into the top of Theo’s boxers. He feels Theo’s breath hitch and laughs against his back.

“Jesus Liam.”

He pulls away before that becomes the only viable option, “I’m kidding… Not really. I’m dead serious, but let’s eat first.”

Theo looks at him and laughs, dips and fries the next piece of bread. Liam points him to the cinnamon while he makes them each a cup of coffee, takes a mental note of exactly how Theo likes his coffee since there will be plenty more mornings like this. He hopes. Liam can totally get used to having a gorgeous guy in his kitchen cooking him breakfast and maybe giving him hand jobs.

His phone rings beside them on the counter and his manager’s face pops up. Liam turns the radio up and answers, sees Theo shoot him a confused look. “He hates it.” Liam mouths and then turns to the screen.

_ “Liam.”  _ Scott’s voice says through the phone.

Liam dances to Sean Kingston’s Beautiful Girls that’s playing, eyes closed and really gets into it while Scott yells at him.

_ “Liam!!!” _

Theo grins and shakes his head, Liam even raises a hand and sways from side to side purposely ignoring Scott.

_ “Liam!! Goddamnit turn it down, I’m trying…” _

“Daaaamn all these beautiful boys!!!” he yells out above the music flipping the phone to Theo briefly, he sees Scott face flare in annoyance. Liam loves pissing him off, it’s hilarious. Maybe only to him, but still. Theo’s looks at him, laughing, then reaches for the radio and flips it off.

“Traitor!”

Theo shrugs, toasting another two slices in the pan. He looks so fucking domestic and pretty, Liam thinks, then pulls his attention back to Scott before he’s really in trouble.

_ “Are you ever gonna grow up??” _

Liam leans his elbows on the counter to hold the phone up, “Not today no.”

_ “You got company?” _

“Yeah!” he turns the phone to Theo, “This is my manager Scott. This is Theo, say hi!”

_ “Hello Theo.” _

“Hi, uh, Scott. How’s it going man?”

_ “You the guy who’s gonna put this crazy shit back in his place?” _

Theo gives Liam a lingering thoughtful look and winks, “Nah. Kinda like him a little crazy.”

“Crazy for you though.” Liam says, winks then blushes. Scott groans on the other end. “What do you want from me on a Saturday, Scotty?”

_ “Two things. I’ve got some people from Halogen…” _

“No.”

_ “What do you mean no? It’s a 15k contract?” _

“They test on animals yeah? They model fur?”

_ “Liam…” _

“No. Final answer.”

Scott sighs but accepts it.  _ “Fine. Secondly. Next Saturday is the Gala. Do you need anything?” _

“Oh shit. Fuck I forgot.” he needs  _ everything _ , a suit, a ride... a date. Shit.

_ “Yeah because you’re a man-child. Send me a list, I’ll sort it out.” _

“Sweet! Thanks Scotty”

_ “Cheers Liam.” _

Theo looks at him with raised brows, and Liam smiles meekly. “Sorry.” He looks down at the breakfast, already plated at their seats. Liam moves over and sits next to Theo.

Theo hooks a leg around his between the chairs and they start eating in silence. After a long while of silence Theo pokes him with an elbow, “You okay?”

No. No, he’s not okay. Maybe it’s just him being dramatic. He wants to ask Theo to be his date to this thing more than anything, the entrance is always plus one, and he’s always taken Mason but now he’s got an amazing guy of his own to take but…

“Fine.” he gives Theo a stiff smile, but the guy’s not stupid he knows something is up and there’s no use in trying to hide it. “It’s this Gala thing. Uh, we can take partners but…”

Theo suddenly resigns, looks back into his plate and stabs at the French toast but fails to take a bite, “Oh. If you… I mean you can...” Liam’s not following what Theo’s getting at, but his pretty face has dropped significantly and Liam hates that. “You don’t have to take me if that’s what you’re worried about. I don’t…”

“Oh god. No. Are you crazy?? No. Of course I  _ want  _ to take you. I wanna take you everywhere why would you…”

Theo opens his mouth, but nothing comes out and his smile is still not reaching his eyes. He shakes his head and says, “Old habits. Sorry. Not used to this kind of thing I guess.”

“Someone liking you?” Liam asks softly.

Theo flinches a little and rubs his face. “Someone liking  _ all _ of me.”  with a sigh he drops his cutlery, “Not used to guys like you spending more than a night or staying for more than sex. Not used to guys like you period.”

Liam doesn’t like the sound of that. Doesn’t like being put in a box because he looks a certain way. Definitely doesn’t like that Theo is unhappy. “Guys like me?”

“Really gorgeous guys Liam. Like you with your blue eyes and perfect body and… your perfect personality. I don’t… I’ve never been the one guys  _ want _ to be with, never mind a great guy like you.”

“It’s about Jackson.” Liam blurts out and looks away. “He will be there. He models for Halogen and they’re a sponsor of the event. I wouldn’t even be going, purely out of principal, but these events are a great business opportunity for us models. Like scouting almost.” He takes a deep breath and dares to look up at Theo.

Theo looks a little taken aback, and Liam gets it. It’s really uncomfortable to have an exe’s name pop up in conversation especially with the guy whose dick you touched not so long ago. “Oh…” Theo says, “You don’t want him to see you with…”

“No! Jesus.” Liam starts laughing and gets up, somehow manages to climb into Theo’s lap on the highchair. He still amazes himself sometimes, both Jay and his mom says he should have been an acrobat with the shit he pulls. Theo doesn’t look far from agreeing with them. “I’m small. Shut up.” he says quickly before Theo questions it. Then he smiles and takes Theo’s face in his hands. “My ex is a first-class asshole. I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable that he’d be there or risk him saying something stupid to you. That is all it is.” Liam places a ghost-like kiss onto Theo’s lips watching his face melt and feeling him sigh, “So, will you?”

Theo hums, eyes closed and his perfect smile creeping back onto his face again, making him look the way Liam likes him to look. Happy. “Hhm?”

Liam giggles, “Will you come with me to this stupid Gala. Will you be my date?”

“I don’t know, think I’ll need some convincing.” Theo says, his hands sliding up Liam’s back, making him shiver, but he leans down for a kiss, slow and deep, until Theo digs blunt nails into his back and he pulls the two of them impossibly close. He rounds the kiss off with a tender peck to Theo’s chin.

“Please?”

“Oh, don’t do that with the eyes, that’s just unfair.”

Liam bats his eyes some more, not even aware that’s what he was doing but if it works…

He finally gives Liam a wide grin and squeezes his ass, “Of course I’ll go with you.”

Theo doesn’t want to let him off, so Liam stays in his lap, and honestly, what better place to eat sugary French toast than in a pretty dude’s lap, feeding him pieces of it and subtly letting your finger slip into his mouth and over his soft lips every so often.

“You’re adorable.” Theo says low around a mouthful, hands secure around Liam’s back.

Liam smiles, feeds him one more piece of toast and says, “I know.” And then he leans down and licks the sugar off Theo’s lips.

“You know, I’ll probably never feed myself ever again after this.”

“That’s perfectly fine with me. I’m happy to help anytime.” He cleans up a few crumbs from Theo’s chin and finishes his own piece of toast.

After breakfast Liam leads Theo to the guest bathroom, hands him a few fresh towels and even starts the shower for him. He wants to stay and watch with every fibre of his being, thinks there can’t possibly be a better sight on earth, but he knows Theo’s not comfortable with that, so he gives him a quick kiss on the cheek and shuts the door behind him.

Liam washes himself up too, slips into tights and a loose t-shirt Adidas had sent over a few weeks back, getting his size totally wrong, it works pretty well for lazy days at home though.

“Now what does a guy have to do to get a smile like that?” Theo says suddenly from the doorway, Liam realises he was grinning at himself like an idiot.

“Well, just standing there all wet and pretty should get the job done.” He smiles at Theo and buries himself in the clean, fresh smell of him, hair still damp and skin cool from the shower.

“God, we are proper sappy fools, aren’t we?”

“No regrets.” Liam murmurs against the skin under Theo’s jaw, kissing and nuzzling at it.

Theo keens into the touch, his hands circling Liam’s waist, “Plans for today?” he asks weakly.

“Yeah!” Liam pulls away, “I’m gonna make you watch those movies I told you about!”

“Oh god, all of them?”

“At  _ least  _ twenty.”

Despite the fake protest Theo follows him back down the hallway to the t.v room with the big white corner couch. He plops Theo down on it and plants a kiss between his hair, “Watch this.” he says, then “T.V on!” and with that the wall mounted unit switches on and displays a greeting back at Liam. He looks back at Theo, mouth open and smiling because it still amazes him every time too.

“You are such a dork I swear.” Theo beams at him and grabs him down for a proper kiss, and it’s just perfect, Theo kisses like magic. Always soft and sweet but at the same time urging in a way that wakes Liam up deep inside. He can’t imagine ever kissing anyone else again, these are the lips he wants, the face, the body, the heart. All of it. He’s pretty damn gone, and at this point he thinks Theo is too so Liam is very, very okay with beginning to give his heart away again, despite his reservations about it before. (Realistically he knows that from the first time Theo smiled at him he had already surrendered.)

Theo’s eyes never leave him, he watches him intently, carefully, almost like he’s studying him. So, he can’t help that he blushes while getting some snacks and juice ready for them, he does however pretend not to see Theo watching him just so that he can actually get something done without dropping things or bumping into stuff. He’s a mess, truly.

He finally settles in next to Theo, squishing in under his arm and scrolls through Netflix. “You need to stop staring at me like that. It’s hazardous.” He says looking at the screen.

Theo, who is also looking at the screen, casually says, “You need to stop looking so hot in tights, is what  _ you _ need to do.” While running his hand down Liam’s leg.

“Could take them off.” He mumbles, keeping busy while still looking for a movie, Theo’s hands now combing through his hair, making him shiver all over.

“We have movies to watch Liam. Focus please.”

“Don’t talk to me in that sexy teacher voice,  _ please, _ or we’ll never get to these movies.” Liam squirms around a little where he sits. That voice is really fucking hot.

Theo presses his lips to Liam’s ear and whispers, “Say please again.”

*****

Liam’s only slightly embarrassed that he’s hard just from that. He tosses the laptop to the other end of the couch and climbs into Theo’s lap again. This time though, Theo grabs hold of his ass through the spandex and starts massaging his cheeks while kissing him, and Liam thinks he can really just come like this. He can’t help the moans that leave his throat at feeling Theo’s dick press against him.

Theo’s stubble scratches against his lips when he starts kissing down his jaw, his neck and clavicle, all while grinding down in Theo’s lap in lazy circles which seem much appreciated if Theo squeezing his ass like a stress ball is anything to go by.

Liam slips down to the floor and to his knees, wiggles in between Theo’s thighs and looks up at him, his lips part to ask if he can, but Theo lifts his hips and allows Liam to pull his sweatpants down.

It’s an incredibly tense and silent moment, an aching heat hanging around them and once Liam has the pants pulled down over Theo’s knees he takes a stuttering breath. Theo’s beautiful like this, exposed and vulnerable but that’s contrasted by the strong thickness of his thighs.

“Fuck…. Your legs…” Liam gushes, sweeping flat palms up and down the smooth skin. Theo’s chest rises and falls in quick successions the closer Liam gets to his dick.  Liam smiles and nuzzles his face against the inside of Theo’s thigh, inhaling deep and then placing an open-mouthed kiss right there that makes Theo shudder and reach for him.  He curls their fingers together and moves to the other thigh. There he lets his tongue linger a little while before softly biting a trail lower and lower.

“Liam…”  Theo whimpers breathlessly, hips squirming into the couch, dick jumping hard against his stomach desperate for attention.

“You have amazing thighs, so thick, I love it.” He says between each kiss to Theo’s bare skin. He watches as a blurt of pre-come bubble out at the praise. It’s fucking glorious. Theo only responds with an inaudible sound and fast breathing.

Theo lets his legs drop open as Liam trails kisses down, he knows he’s going too slowly, knows Theo’s just about dying and when he finally presses his lips against Theo’s shaft and licks softly, Theo arches off the couch, dick smudging against Liam’s open lips, and his hand finds a new place in Liam’s hair.

“You’re killing me Li…”

Liam smirks and lets his tongue swirl upward and flip over the tip, watching him gasp and throw his head back at that. Then his hand comes down and cups Liam’s chin, tugging his mouth open gently his other hand finds the base of his shaft and he presses his dick against Liam’s tongue and slides inside. He looks like he’s gonna pass the fuck out.

“Shit dollface…. Shit... oh god” he moans as his hips rise up into Liam’s mouth. Liam, on the other hand, is dying at the name Theo called him, forgets for a second how a blow job even works.

He hums around Theo’s cock and starts sliding his mouth up and down, pumping at the base with his hand and whenever he can, he looks up at Theo. His eyes are mostly closed, but he catches Liam’s gaze as he works him over and he looks at him like he wants to break out in a song of thanks or like he might start crying. But he also looks like he’s in heaven right now, guiding Liam’s head to gradually go faster and Liam loves it. Kind of wishes Theo would just grab his face and use his mouth any which way he pleases because Liam will take it.

“I’m gonna come doll…” Theo warns and gently tugs Liam’s hair, probably thinks he’s being polite to try and pull Liam off but that’s not how Liam operates, so he grips Theo by the wrist and stills his hand. He gets the message and apparently that does it for him because the next thing Liam’s swallowing thick hot liquid down the back of his throat.

Theo stutters and pushes Liam’s head further down, pulling hard on his hair now that he’s coming, “Christ… fuck me!”

Liam gags blissfully around his cock, at being pushed down on it. He moans and keeps sucking softly until Theo lets him up. “Come here.” He says, voice raspier than usual and when Liam climbs back in his lap, he grabs the back of his head and kisses him, wet and soft, Liam’s sure Theo can taste himself still on Liam’s tongue.

His dick is straining inside his tights as Theo rubs over it, “Can you take it off?” he asks, smoothing his hands down Liam’s thighs.

Liam gets to his feet instantly, “Fuck yes I can take it off.” and because he’s a little shit, he turns around to give Theo a delicious view of his ass. He has a cute ass okay, and he knows it. Theo seems to agree since his eyes are dark and he’s chewing through his lip. He pulls Liam flush against him, back to chest, so he sits square in his lap and starts jacking him off.

He lets his head drop back on Theo’s shoulder, feels his lips in his neck, other hand feeling over his abs and circling his nipple once he gets there. He starts moving with Theo’s hand, panting unashamedly and when Theo says “That’s it doll, that’s it baby…” he starts coming. Theo has a wave of brilliance and bites down on his neck, sucking, and Liam just about flies through the roof.

Liam’s a twitching, wet mess when he opens his eyes after the rush of pleasure and Theo’s kissing tenderly over the bruise he sucked into Liam’s neck. “You’re so hot.” He mumbles into Liam’s hair.

“You called me doll…” Liam breaths out as if that’s meant to explain why he came so fast.

“Yeah. You’re as pretty as one.” He says, his kisses light and airy on Liam’s skin, again wracking him with shivers. “My dollface.” Theo whispers and wraps his arms around Liam tightly.

*****

* * *

Much later Theo’s sprawled out on the couch, head in Liam’s lap while the movie nears the end. Liam wraps tendrils of Theo’s soft hair around his fingers, scratching softly at his scalp from time to time. Theo must really be enjoying the movie since he hasn’t fallen asleep, his breathing is steady and shallow though, and Liam loves that he’s this relaxed with him. Feels good, and it’s comfortable in a way that Liam has long forgotten.

“Ooh watch this part. This is the best.” Liam says and turns the volume up. Theo looks up at him and smiles, he wishes he knew what the guy is thinking every time he gets this look on his face.

_ “So what happened after he climbed up the tower and rescued her?” _ Richard Gere says on the screen, and Julia replies with  _ “She rescues him right back.”  _ Liam mumbles it along with the movie, well, because he knows every frikken line and as far as cliched, dramatic love declarations go this one is right up there next to  _ “I hate the way I don’t hate you.” _

“Aww, how sweet.” Theo purrs, turning to Liam as the credits roll. He yawns and circles Liam’s waist, nuzzling into his stomach, “That was good. I liked it.”

“Yeah? It’s one of my favourites.”

Theo sleepily hums and yawns again, “Hmm.”

“Hey, you hungry? I’m kind of hungry.”

“I actually am yeah. What have we got?”

“Room Service” Liam says and reaches for his phone, dialling Jaymie up.

“Yo! Mr. Johnson!”

_ “Nope. Wrong again.” _

“Ah come on man. It’s gotta be Jaymie Johnson right? How’s it not Jaymie Johnson??”

_ “Can I help you Mr Lee?” _ Jaymie says all flat and faux annoyed but Liam can hear him smile. He’ll guess his fucking last name one day, if it’s the last thing he does.

“Yeah,” He answers while he strokes along Theo’s jaw, “Don’t you have some yummy leftovers from the function you can bring up? We huuungry.”

Jaymie sighs on the other end and Liam pictures him pinching the skin between his eyes.  _ “Kind sir, I am a concierge. Not a goddamn butler.” _

“Jaaaaaay….”

_ “We got ribs and wings and spring rolls.  Take your pick.” _

“All of the above. Thank you!”

_ “Kids of today I swear…” _

“Oh my god Jay, how old are you??”

Jaymie hangs up but shows up at Liam’s door twenty minutes later. Liam’s never been sure why it takes Jaymie so long to do anything, guesses it’s because he wears those fucking high heels all over. These heels are pretty cute though, Liam has to admit staring down at Jaymie’s long slender legs adorned with spikey pink platforms in his doorway.

“Hi!” he says brightly, and Jay leans in for a cheek-kiss, handing Liam the platter of leftover snacks.

“Where’s my boo-boo.” Jaymie asks pushing past Liam and sashays inside. The very embodiment of fabulous with his matching pink blazer and all-black attire.

Liam follows him through to the lounge. “You know there was a time that I was your boo-boo.” 

Jaymie’s face scrunches up before he leans down to greet Theo with a kiss too, “It’s twenty-gay-teen Lee, a guy can have more than one boo-boo, kay?” he says, flopping down next to Theo.

Theo smiles, “Hey Jay.”

Jaymie’s just smiling at him, a knowing kind of smile that makes his eyes crinkle and his mouth twitch.

“Oh my god, what??” Theo finally caves after a few second staring match.

“You two really got your sexy on up in here huh?”

“Oh wow...”

Liam cackles at how red Theo goes, it’s kind of adorable and he has the urge to jump back in his lap again. “Yeah, every surface, every position even the ceiling fan.” Liam jokes and laughs even more when Theo buries his face in a pillow.

“Oh honey,” Jaymie says reaching for a spring roll, “None of that shit gonna put me off. What are we watching?”

Liam makes himself comfortable between Theo’s knees since Jay has taken up his seat and digs in too. “I’m showing him all the classics first.” He’s spent many nights with Jaymie watching these films when he was alone, something he no longer has to endure- that and Jaymie’s live critique of the movies. He snuggles up against Theo’s thigh a little more, and clicks the next movie, “Ghost is up next.”

“Oh, no no no, Theo baby, you don’t wanna see this bullshit…”

“Jay doesn’t like ghosts.” Liam clarifies.

“Who does??? Not me. Crazy ass white girl entertaining this shit with her dead boyfriend.”

“You’re telling me if the love of your life died and came to say goodbye then you wouldn’t want to see them one last time?”

“Not as a ghost??!!”

“Yeah well…” he nudges Theo with his head, “Theo wouldn’t scare me.”

Jaymie huffs, Theo squeezes Liam’s shoulder in acknowledgement, and Liam realizes he just kind of lowkey implied that Theo is the love of his life.

It’s not a lie.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last one! Enjoy!

“Jesus baby, you okay??” says Jaymie, staring wide eyed and dramatically bewildered at Theo when he orders a mini salad for lunch on Thursday instead of his regular toasted cheese.

 

He shrugs and hands the menu back to the waitress without thinking twice about it, he’ll change his mind if he does. “I’m on a diet.”

 

Jaymie just about spits his coconut water out across the table, “A what now??”

 

“A diet Jay.” Theo says and gulps down bland tasting sparkling water, he pretends it taste like something sugary. How do people do this every damn day, he wonders, he’s been at it for only a week and he could literally raid a shelf and consume every single thing on it. Perhaps even the shelf itself.

 

Jaymie pulls a horrified face, mouth corners turning down. “Boo… Why?” he asks as if it’s the most outlandish thing he’s ever heard. He’s not wrong in thinking that though, it _is_ insane.

 

Theo sighs, folds his hands on the table in front of him, “Liam’s got a thing on Saturday. Wants me to go with him.”

 

“And they don’t got no food at this thing??” he still looks genuinely horrified, grabs his chest over his satin blouse.

 

Theo laughs and tosses a straw at him, “No, you ass. It’s a model thing with all the models being all model-y. You know… like models are.”

 

“Ah!” Jaymie exclaims, grasping, “Ah. Okay. Okay.” and then he gives Theo a stern glare, “So you’re starving your little butt off until then.”

 

“Well--”

 

“Come I tell you what’s gonna happen boo-boo.” Jaymie leans back in the booth, long red-tipped fingers pointing Theo down. Theo swallows because it’s pretty intimidating, reminds him of his mom in a way. Only scarier. “You gon’ eat this fuckin’ salad until you start looking like it, and then, you know what then?”

 

“Enlighten me.”

 

Jaymie gets a twinkle in his eye and before Theo can stop him, he mouths off, “You gon’ get so hungry you’ll eat Lee’s dick straight off!”

 

“Jaymie!!! Jesus!”

 

Jaymie cackles out loud and Theo flushes just as the waitress returns with their meals. She places Theo’s green salad in front of him and slides Jaymie’s plate of fries over.

 

“What is wrong with you huh?” Theo grumbles, fighting a grin and failing.

 

“Oh honey. No one knows.” Jaymie says flatly, pouring ketchup on his fries. “So my point is baby, a week is not enough time to get skinny ‘kay? You ain’t gonna look like a model by Saturday, so all you’re doing right now is ruining your body. Fucking all the shit up in there.” He gestures to Theo’s general person while stuffing two fries in his mouth. Theo would be offended, but it’s true.

 

Theo in turn pokes at a green leaf and half a tomato with his fork and brings it to his mouth, “Well what the fuck now Jay?? I can’t go to that thing looking like this! With all those skinny boys and…”

 

Jaymie arches up one freshly groomed eyebrow, “And what?”

He’s been trying to forget about this, about Liam’s ex and his dumb perfect cheekbones he saw in those photos. Theo keeps telling himself Jackson’s an asshole, Liam said so himself, but that hardly takes away from the fact that he’ll be there, and he’ll probably look like a demigod while Theo…

 

“Jackson--”

 

Jaymie falls back in his seat, flabbergasted, “Goddamn.” He looks like he gets the salad obsession now, that Theo really has no choice here and that he’s fucked either way.

 

“Yeah. Exactly.”

 

“Shit boo...”

 

“He didn’t want me to go, because of that, but--”

 

Jaymie airily waves him off, “Oh please, he’s too in love with you honey. That boy can barely breathe one night without you. Always sittin’ on my desk, moaning ‘eeh Jay I miss him eeh Jay help me’, you know?”

 

Theo goes bright red, averts his eyes to the street outside. “Shut up Jay.” Liam has never said he loves him out loud. It’s obvious in the way he acts around Theo, the way he holds and kisses him, the way he… Theo clears his throat then, tries not to think about Liam’s hands on him. “What am I gonna do?” he asks Jaymie instead. Jaymie of all people will know what to do.

 

There’s a sympathetic softness in Jaymie’s eyes when he answers, “Baby. I’ve told you this from the very start. There’s more to you than what you look like. And it just takes one name to make you forget that honey… So I’ll remind you again…” Jaymie takes Theo’s hands in his over the table top and Theo looks at him with a small smile.

 

“You are smart and kind baby, you are pure in a way people ain’t anymore, okay? That’s what Liam fell in love with. He saw that without even looking.” Jaymie’s deep brown eyes feel like they’re staring straight through Theo. “And,” he says, smiling, “you pretty as hell. Half those models have nothing on you.”

 

“Aw Jay, you know I’m taken…” he jokes, giving Jaymie a playful, lingering glance to lighten the mood.

 

“Honey, you wouldn’t know what the hell to do with me if you ever got this lucky.” Jaymie winks and pulls away. “Besides… I like ‘em more Bretty’s height. You know. Climb it like a tree.”

 

Theo bursts out laughing, Jaymie joins soon after and they just about flail around in the booth for air from the way they’re laughing.

 

Later, when they leave, Theo squeezes Jaymie tight in a hug and whispers a quiet “Thank you” into his ear.

* * *

 

Thursday night he’s at home with Brett and Mason and they’re back to their usual routine of watching junk t.v and eating too much. Theo’s relented the fight with salad and sparkling water in favour of a delicious thick crust and double cheese pizza. Incredible, oily goodness. He only half regrets it.

 

In truth, he’s realised what Jaymie said holds water. He’s never going to be that skinny, washboard abs kind of guy. And maybe Liam liking him this way is enough, maybe liking himself the way he is, is enough. There’s a lot more to him than the lumps at his sides, or his thighs brushing together.

 

“Hey!” Brett says beside him, mouth shiny with pizza grease, standing between Mason’s legs, “What are you thinking about huh?” Theo realises he’s been miles away for who knows how long.

 

“Mmm, do you know a suit shop?”

 

“A suit shop?”

 

“You know. Where fancy people buy suits and shit Brett.”

 

Brett grins while chewing, “What? You mean those grey linen suits of yours?” and he makes a face at Theo.

 

Mason, the hero that he is, slaps Brett’s bicep. “I know a place T. They do tailored adjustments too. Want me to take you?”

 

“See Bread—yes please Mase.” Theo points at Mason, cheeks stuffed full, “That’s what friends do. Friends don’t make fun of friends’ linen suits.”

 

Brett grossly licks some cheese off Mason’s chin then kisses him, “He’s just being nice ‘coz you got him pizza.”

 

“Actually. I have a linen suit myself.”  Mason says and winks at Theo.

 

Brett then seemingly becomes liquid in front of Mason, “Oh man,” he says, “I _love_ linen suits!”

 

It gets him a slap with a piece of pizza against the cheek from Theo and an adorning kiss from Mason. Theo watches them smile at each other, Mason’s fingers gently curling into Brett’s golden-brown locks of hair, and he smiles too.

 

Theo’s phone rings a little while after that, stomach doing a flip when it’s a FaceTime from Liam. He checks himself on the screen quickly before answering, shuffles his hair around into something presentable, and despite still chewing a bite of pizza, he answers.

 

“Hey doll!”

 

“ _Hi baby!_ ” Liam says happily. He’s laying down in the bath, his long dark hair floating whimsically in the water around his head.

 

“You’re in the bath with your phone?”

 

 _“Yeah….”_ Liam gets a little lost in the moment, “ _Look at my hair…. Looks like a mermaid’s!_ ” he swooshes it around under the water, his tongue poking at the side of his mouth.

 

“Sure does doll.” Theo mouth curls into a fond smile. Liam is beautiful, Theo thinks as he watches him. He takes another bite of his pizza, “Hey… I miss you.”

 

Liam focuses back on Theo and grins so wide at the words it makes his eyes narrow and the highs of his cheeks turn a gorgeous pink, _“I miss you too. Come over tomorrow night? Got something I wanna talk to you about.”_

 

“That sounds bad. Is it bad??” he says, chewing, but Liam is just staring at him without answer.

 

 _“You’re even cute when you chew… how is that possible??”_ Liam asks, perplexed, and it throws Theo off a little. _“I wanna boop your nose so hard right now!”_

 

Theo laughs, “Listen. You’re a real smooth talker Li but I’ve gotta run, Brett’s giving me looks. I’ll see you tomorrow yeah?”

 

_“Okay, okay. I... uh… Have a good night! I’ll see you tomorrow!”_

“You too. Dream of me doll.”

 

_“Always do!”_

 

 

Brett’s giggling by the time he gets back to the lounge and Mason is no doubt texting Liam to make fun of him too. He tells them “You two are sappy too!” and they tease him by acting out the entire video call.

 

He can only hate them a little because he’s laughing pretty hard at Mason’s version of Liam swooshing his hair around in the tub which is basically Mason on the carpet squirming while Brett stands over him and tells him how pretty he is.

 

Idiots.

* * *

 

He goes to Liam on Friday night after work. The plan was simple. Get take out, watch Dirty Dancing, drool collectively over Swayze and cuddle. But…

*

“Jesus Liam… I’m gonna come… _oh… god”_ Theo grabs Liam’s hair in his fist, twists it slightly to make Liam moan around him. Liam sucks and swallows one last time and Theo’s gone.

 

He comes hard, hips jerking, looking down at Liam with his lips stretched around his dick up to the base. Holy shit, he’s never seen anything as gorgeous. His blue eyes twinkle with tears and his pretty mouth is wet with the effort he put in to get Theo off.

 

He lets Liam up, watching him catch his breath. Liam wipes his mouth before he shoots a brilliant smile at Theo, all flushed from his cheeks down to his bare chest.

 

Breathless Liam says, “Next time we’ll just call it, ‘movies in the background while we do sexy stuff’ huh?” and nudges his nose against Theo’s.

 

Theo pulls him down on top of him and fixes Liam’s hair that he messed up in the throes of his orgasm, “Hmm, I kind of like that you invite me over under the pretence of talking and watching movies, and then take advantage of my weakness for you.”

 

He rolls them over, dives down into Liam’s neck and while he mouths at the pale skin he listens to Liam’s broken little sounds. It’s like that one great song that comes on and you just leave it on repeat for four days straight. The sounds Liam makes have the same effect.

 

He kisses down to Liam’s pec, circles a nipple languidly with his tongue. Takes time to really taste Liam’s skin, feel the softness of it under his lips, licks at the tender spots where his pulse throbs. After he has Liam panting, arching up off the bed and practically glowing, he moves back up to his mouth.

 

They fall into a spiral of rough and hungry kissing, Theo’s getting hard again and Liam’s dick dribbles inside his boxers, damp where it presses to Theo’s thigh. Liam cups his ass from behind and he alternates between squeezing and smoothing over them.

 

It’s not long before he feels Liam tugging at his shirt again, wanting him to take it off, but as he feels Liam’s sharp hip bones dig into his own he clams up again, stiffens.

 

“Uhm…” he lets out a shaky breath, disappointed with himself, dropping his head on Liam’s shoulder.

 

Liam pulls the shirt back down and whispers a soft and understanding “Okay.” and instead brings Theo’s mouth to his. Soon the awkward moment is lost between kisses and the soft, soft sounds they make.

 

Liam becomes frantic beneath Theo, so he grabs the lube on the side table and shifts so that he’s alongside Liam now. His one hand cradles the back of Liam’s head, and the one he has slicked up, moves down between Liam’s legs.

 

His blue eyes are large and dark, swimming with want when Theo’s fingers slip between his cheeks for the first time. “Yeah?” Theo asks and Liam nods eagerly, drops his legs open further.

 

Theo’s middle finger finds his hole the same time he puts his lips back on Liam’s, and he presses in without any effort. His body, hot and wet inside, gives way easily to Theo’s hand. Liam’s lips part as he sucks in a deep lungful.

 

He begins stroking in and out slowly, watches Liam’s pretty face for any signs of pain but there aren’t any - his eyes are loosely closed, his hands holding onto Theo, and he’s breathing fast. Most importantly there’s a lax, open-mouthed smile on his face.

 

Theo kisses that smile and whispers into Liam’s ear, “Touch yourself for me doll.” and slips in another finger.

 

Liam flounders a little to comply but grabs his dick in a haste and starts jerking himself off. The sight is damn near perfect to watch, impossible not to surrender to it. Theo’s cock aches where it presses against Liam.

 

It doesn’t take much, Theo lifts himself, turns his palm up and thrust into Liam in quick successions. Liam’s knees come up and he squeezes his eyes shut, then says, “Oh _fuck_ , fuck Theo, you’re so good! God, you’re so good!” and makes a thick, delectable sound right in the back of his throat before he comes all over himself, shaking.

 

And obviously and as embarrassing as it is, Theo comes again too just from Liam’s praise. He spills out against Liam’s thigh, with only the slightest amount of friction as stimulation, and although it’s less than before it renders him numb all the same.

 *

Later when they’re just laying still in the middle of Liam’s massive bed, sheets thrown loosely over them, Liam tilts his head up at Theo, kisses his jaw and abruptly sits up. He straddles over Theo’s waist and grins down at him. The sheet scantily covers his bare body in places Theo would much rather see exposed and with the light catching him from behind he looks dreamy, almost surreal. Theo touches Liam’s strong legs just to make sure he is in fact, right there.

 

Liam pushes his hair out of his eyes, “So, remember I said I wanted to talk to you?”

 

“Uh huh…”

 

“Well you know… we’ve been seeing each other for a while…” and then Liam gets this glint his eye, the one he always gets when he’s about to say something inappropriate or something that’ll make Theo blush.

 

Theo eyes him suspiciously, “Yeah…”

 

Liam puts on a thick voice, definitely mocking, and says “So, do you, uhm, wanna like be my boyf—my uh, guy, you know… my dude, uhm permanently? Maybe? If you wanna?”

 

Theo bursts out laughing, realising Liam’s making fun of poor nervous Brett asking Mason out a little while ago, “Oh god, you dork!” he can’t stop the laughter that bubbles from his chest, it infects Liam too and he collapses beside him on the bed giggling.

 

Once they’re composed enough to look at one another without erupting in snorts and fits of laughter again, Theo rolls onto his side to face Liam. “You’re something else Liam.” He says sincerely, “Fuck. You’re something else.”

 

He really is deeply, and irredeemably in love with his boy.

 

“So, what do you say huh? Be my guy?”

 

“Hells yeah.” He replies instantly, never more sure of anything, smiling too. Deep in his heart something blooms warm and heavy while Liam’s lips are plastered to his own in an insistent effort to get as close as the human body allows. He thinks there’s no ‘close enough’ when it comes to Liam anyway, but that doesn’t stop them from trying.

 

* * *

 

The men’s boutique smelled of lavender or something that Theo now associates with frayed nerves, thoughts of Jackson Whittemore and regrets about eating so much oily pizza.

 

Five hours later, after being measured and taped and tugged around to within an inch of his life, he’s so nervous he’s hardly breathing. Instead of just buttoning up his dress shirt, he feels like someone’s doing up a corset around his waist. He briefly considers actually wearing one. Jesus.

 

“Hey!” Brett says poking him in the ribs while he’s folding his tie, “You’re sweating up the suit buddy. You already got the guy, you can relax now.”

 

“Shut up, it’s not about that.” he says, throat dry.

 

Brett loops the tie over his neck while Mason shines his shoes up with some polish. Honestly, without them he’d be a whole jittery, sweating mess. He _is_ a jittery, sweating mess, they just make it a little more bearable.

 

“Then what’s it huh?” Brett’s tongue pokes out from the corner of his mouth, concentration fixed.

“Liam’s ex will be there.”

 

Brett’s eyes flick up to him only briefly, “So?”

 

“Apparently not the nicest dude around.”

 

This seems to faze Brett even less - Theo’s ever faithful bodyguard - and as if it’s a non-issue he says, “So if he tries anything I’ll just track him down and bust him in the face. No problem.” He knows Brett’s not joking in the least. He’ll do it like he has done many, many times before.

 

Theo just rolls his eyes but smiles at his friend, “I know you will Bread.”

 

After a long while of fussing and squirming and getting too hot for no reason other than being nervous, Theo is finally all dressed up. Mason and Brett stare at him like two proud parents sending their last born off to senior prom. Or war. Or something in between.

 

“She did an amazing job with the tailoring!” Brett says about the kind lady who assisted them, his finger pensively on his chin. Mason hums in approval beside him.

 

Theo smooths his hands over the sides of the jacket- jet black all over and lined with satin at the lapels, the tailor paired it with a crisp white dress shirt and long sleek, black tie. He opted out of a pocket square because only God knows what they’re even for. The suit is tucked and taken in at all the right places, he’s most likely imagining it, but you can hardly tell he’s got love handles. She really did do an excellent job at accentuating exactly what matters.

 

“Jesus. Okay.” He breathes deeply through his nose, shakes the tension from his shoulders. Not that it goes anywhere at all. “Here we go.”

 

“There goes our baby.” Says Brett, tipping his head down on top on Mason’s affectionately, an arm around his shoulder.

 

“They grow up so fast.” Mason whimpers back.

 

At least that gets Theo to laugh. “Love you ma, love you dad!” He calls on his way out of the door.

 

“We’re all alone now daddy...” Brett jokes seductively to Mason before Theo has a chance to close the door behind him or is out of earshot.

 

“Gross!!! Gross gross gross.”

 

He hears them cackle out loud as he descends the stairs, on his way to Liam.

 

* * *

 

Meanwhile back at Liam’s penthouse:

 

“No, wait. Try under this light.”

 

“It’s the same light.”

 

“Is not. This one’s further away from the window, not as bright.”

 

“It’s night time Liam!!!”

 

“Lighting is _key_ Jaymie!!!”

 

“Fucking models--- ooh put your hand behind your neck again---oh yeah, oh ‘dis the good shit baby boy. Now smile a little… no, just a little, yeah like you’re sad but it’s okay ‘coz you pretty. Yeah!”

 

“Okay okay, let me see…. These are all selfies of you!!??”

 

“Damn right they are—OW!”

 

**_To Theo:_ **

_Picture_6435_jpg. Waiting for my boo like…_

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_Daaaamn girl. Liam WHO??_

 

**_To Theo:_ **

_:D_

 

**_From Theo:_ **

_Tell him I’ll be there in 7 minutes._

 

* * *

 

The venue is made up real pretty. Fairy rope lights spiralling around roof to floor pillars, sparkling chandeliers hanging low and large, colourful banners of all the different modelling agencies within the company are splayed across the walls.

 

Gorgeous people _everywhere._

 

“I know I’ve said this before,” Liam leans in and whispers to him, their hands clasped, “but you look amazing. You look _so fucking hot_.”

 

Theo squeezes Liam’s hand, goes red, “Doll, I’ve got nothing on you.”

 

Liam smiles at him, wide and brilliantly and he looks at Theo with his face wide open and true. Theo swears to God he’ll never get tired of that smile. For as long as Liam keeps looking at him this way, smiling at him like that, the world can burn to ash around them and he wouldn’t care.

 

Aside from that Liam really does look sensational. His hair is all slicked back since it’s gotten quite long, and his face is shaven clean. He too, is wearing a smooth black tux, sans the bow tie because he’s a little rebellious like that. Theo loves that wholeheartedly.

 

They head over to the bar to meet Scott, Liam’s manager. Theo is a little embarrassed since the last time he unofficially met Scott was when Liam serenaded him on a video call with the guy. Scott seems unaffected however.

 

“Theo! Nice to meet you man! You look great!” His grip is tight and solid around Theo’s hand and he shrinks at the sincere compliment, only smiles. Scott turns to Liam, “Liam! Where’s the tie buddy? Where’s your tie?” He seems like one of those ever-busy people, never settling, always on the phone. Hurried and exhausted at the same time.

 

“Eh.” Liam shrugs flippantly, “It chokes me.”

 

“Kinda wasn’t optional bud.” Scott slaps Liam’s shoulder the way a dad or big brother would and continues, “Okay look—”

 

And then they start talking a bunch of model jargon, and headshots and things Theo has no clue about, so he lets them be and decides to grab them drinks instead. The bartender slides three glasses of bubbly across the bar top and he hands them over to the other two without interrupting their talk.

 

There’s really nothing left for him to do, and while he’s been trying not to, his eyes start scanning the room for Jackson’s face.

 

He doesn’t spot him at first, only hears a commotion start up near the entrance. And when he does finally see him it’s like a wave of shock hits him right the gut. This man, with his godly chiselled jawline and muscular legs struts into the party, the way you’d see them walk out on the runway. But in slow motion. He swears it’s in slow motion.

 

Jackson greets every single person with a pearly white grin plastered on his face, shakes their hands half-heartedly on the way inside.

 

His double-breasted cream suit clings to his thin frame, flawlessly, he’s entirely fucking flawless right down to his eyes that stand electric green in his head even from far away.

 

And, when he walks by the large mirror, he takes a long lingering look at himself. Still grinning.

 

Theo’s awe struck and completely terrified at once.

 

Any and all confidence he had up to this point dissipates into thin air. It’s all fine, if he just… If he just stays in the corner Jackson won’t even notice him. Maybe Jackson won’t even come over to Liam, they parted on bad terms, didn’t they?

 

His thoughts are short lived though. Jackson spots Liam from a mile away. Honestly, who wouldn’t? Liam however is unaware, enthralled in the conversation with Scott, and Theo’s not sure if Liam is prepared for this, if he should warn him. There’s no time, however, and just before Jackson’s eyes fall on him, Theo spins around to face the other way, swallows dry when he meets the bartender’s quirked up brow.

 

“Well well well.” Is what Jackson opens with. _Really?_ “Hi Li.” He then says and Theo senses him leaning in for a hug. From the corner of his eye he sees Liam stiffen but hug back. Scott’s gone silent. Suddenly Liam’s hand flies back and finds Theo’s, he squeezes.

 

Theo stays turned to the bar.

 

“Uh, hey. Hey. How you doing?” Liam asks shakily, like he had just now figured out how to use his voice. Theo wants to wrap him up and kiss away the frown that he knows is forming between his eyes, but instead he cowers behind Liam still looking in another direction.

 

“Fantastic,” Jackson answers, “McCall.” He says rough and quick. And when Scott greets with a stiff “Whittemore.” Theo can’t help but wonder if there is some history there too, perhaps Scott does the same for Liam that Brett does for him. Perhaps Scott’s the reason for the crooked lump in the middle of Jackson’s otherwise perfect nose.

 

Theo is still dabbling in thought when Liam yanks his arm forward and he’s forced to turn and face them, Fuck. Jackson’s perfect face does a number of things in that moment. First his smile drops, and his eyes flick wildly between Liam and Theo and then this cold steely look settles in his gaze.

 

“This is my boyfriend. Theo.” Liam doesn’t falter on the word, not even for a second, “Babe, this is Jackson.”

 

Theo holds his hand out, but Jackson barks out a laugh, ugly and slimy, looking curiously at Liam. His gaze rakes down Theo’s figure slowly without reaching to meet his hand.

 

Theo, crawling in his skin and wishing the ground would swallow him up, drops his hand to his side again. He should not have come here, he knew this. He’d rather be looking at Josh right now and that should be a very clear indication of how uncomfortable he’s feeling.

 

Scott averts quickly. “Your buddies are over that way.” He says and points to a table where a group of rowdy people cackle with long stem glasses in their hands. Theo can tell, even from where he’s standing, that Jackson and those people are made of the same thing.

 

Jackson grips Liam’s shoulder and says, “It’s okay. We can’t all afford an upgrade.” Then pats Liam’s bicep and turns on his heel.

 

There’s a deep-seated part of Theo that shrugs the comment off, he’s used to that kind of thing, but Liam is pale a sheet, his eyes shut. Frozen.

 

He leans down and kisses Liam’s cheek, “Hey,” he says softly. Liam turns to him, face twisted and apologetic, but he doesn’t need to say anything. It’s not his fault. “Why don’t you show me around huh?”

 

They avoid Jackson for most of the night, instead Liam keeps looking at Theo in that way that makes him feel like the only man on the planet. Theo however, doesn’t miss Jackson’s sharp little glares, the bursts of laughter and quiet whispers from their table whenever he walks by where they sit.

 

He dreads the moment when Liam gets up to fill their drinks and leaves him alone. He felt it in his bones all night, something bad and niggling, so when a boy with a mouth too large for his face from Jackson’s table comes over with a plate over stacked with a heap of finger foods, he knows why.

 

“Thought we’d save you the walk.” He says friendly enough that it’s chilling and pushes the plate in front of Theo. He smiles, grimy like Jackson, and walks away laughing with the rest of them. When Theo’s head stops spinning, he catches Jackson’s eyes. The asshole grins and raises his glass at Theo.

He wants to run away. He wants to call Brett and cry. He wants to rip this stupid suit off and just let the ugly that he’s hiding out. What’s it worth, anyway? Everyone can see right through it, and once again he’s nothing more than a fat ass because Jaymie isn’t there to tell him he’s not and his own voice cowers in the back of his mind. Theo berates himself for ever putting his mouth on food.

 

Liam finds him in a mess, flushed and close to tears, he’s confused when he looks at the huge, untouched stack of food on the plate but when he connects the dots, fury settles in his blue eyes. Theo urges him to stay calm, to stop apologizing for a dick. To which Liam replies that a dick is at least still useful.

 

The last thing they need is a huge scene at an event like this. It’s then that he thanks his lucky stars that Brett isn’t around. He’s sure blood wouldn’t wash out of that cream atrocity easily.

 

For at least two more hours they manage to avoid the group, they even sneak a couple of kisses in dimly lit corners of the venue and forget about the situation altogether. When they dance to Springsteen, Liam kisses him properly, with meaning, and they sway with their foreheads pressed together. It doesn’t matter then whose eyes are on them. It’s only them and his heart feels like it might explode with what he feels for this boy, doesn’t think he’ll ever find the words to exactly articulate it.

 

Theo spins him out in a theatrical twirl when the song ends and Liam graces him with that smile that could flatten cities again.

 

Jackson doesn’t smile though, not at all. He’s bitter, and it seethes from him in waves. _What a dumbass_ , Theo thinks, _you had this, you had his heart, and you trampled all over it and look at him now. Look how he smiles for me._ He gives Jackson a smug look that he’s rather proud of, and he loves seeing his perfect composure crumble.

 

In hindsight he should have known that would be the end of it. That look.

 

Around midnight they’re ready to leave when Jackson stops them. Theo feels kind of sorry for him, he looks miserable but then his loud voice cracks through the room.

 

“Hey wait up! Where are you going?? There’s still some food left!” he cackles obnoxiously at himself.

 

Fast as lightning Liam spins around and lunges for Jackson, pure spitfire rage. Scott’s faster though, he grabs Liam by the waist and Jackson jumps back a few steps, eyes wide, weak without his pack of wolves.

 

“What the fuck is your problem?? Huh??” Liam screams, voice echoing in the quiet, empty hall. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!” he fights in Scott’s hold.

 

Jackson points an accusatory finger at Theo, “This guy, Li, really? This fucking—”

 

Theo is out the door before Jackson has a chance to finish the sentence. He doesn’t need to hear it because he kind of knows what follows that anyway.

 

The cool crisp night air hits his heated skin hard, dreadful, and he pulls over a cab without really thinking about it. He gets in and shuts the door behind him in a daze and numb, the car’s moving already when the door swings open again, and Liam jumps in after him.

 

He hears Liam’s voice distantly talking, begging, apologetic for something he didn’t do. But he can’t answer, he can’t speak. He’s so tired of this fight within him, he’s so sick of pretending words like that doesn’t hurt, that the way Jackson treated him tonight doesn’t hurt. It does. And right now, it’s unbearable.

 

Liam gives up eventually, talking to the side of Theo’s face, and falls silent.

 

The rest of the taxi ride over to Liam’s apartment is quiet. Broken.

* * *

 

It’s dark in the apartment when they get there, only silver beams of moonlight ominously stream in through the large glass window and along with the faint yellow under lights along the ceiling, it provides just enough light to see the way to the kitchen. Theo doesn’t turn on anymore lights, it’s easier to hide how he’s feeling in the dark.

 

Theo stalks across the room to the drink tray and stands with his back to the door when Liam enters. He pours a shot of whiskey into a tumbler and downs it and it burns all the way down to his gut. His back burns too with Liam’s apprehensive gaze, a tense and disconcerting silence hanging all around as they both wait for the next move.

 

This is make or break for them. This is where he walks away, or where he lays himself bare. He knows the implications of both. Undoubtedly, if he leaves, he’ll do so with a massive hole in his heart where Liam is supposed to be, one that will probably never be filled the same way again. On the other hand, should he stay, he’ll be subjected to this kind of treatment for however long this lasts between them, every other person on the street will openly wonder what a solid ten is doing with a four-bordering-five like it’s their business in the first place. He is so far out of his league he can’t see a way back anymore.

 

He knows what he needs to do.

 

When he turns, Liam’s standing with his hands shoved in his pockets, bottom lip pulled into his mouth and between his pretty eyes sits that worrisome frown. He’s waiting for the inevitable, brimming with heartache, that much is obvious.

 

“Theo… I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for what he said, what he did… I…” Liam starts, but Theo sticks a hand up and stops him in his tracks. None of that matters now. Liam’s jaw slams shut again.

 

“You know. From the very start, I thought this would never work. I thought, eventually my weight is gonna become an issue, the fact that my clothes don’t fit the way yours do, I’ve even thought about how I could never wear your shirts like couples do, ‘coz they simply won’t fit me. Guys like you...” he laughs wetly, sad, “you know the tune by now, don’t you?”

 

Liam grinds down on his teeth, shakes his head and looks down. Even in the dark of the kitchen Theo can see his eyes shine wet. Still, he doesn’t speak, just keeps looking down at the cold marble of the countertop.

 

Theo starts undoing his tie, “At first I told myself you’ll get bored or embarrassed, eventually. That it’s just a fling.” he drops the tie to the ground, “But then you stayed.”

 

Liam still doesn’t look at him, but a shimmering wet trail runs down his cheek. He’s still _impossibly_ beautiful, so much so that it makes Theo’s heart clench tight in his chest.

 

“Then,” he says, shrugging off his jacket and draping it over a chair - this gets Liam’s attention - “then I thought I could hide from you, that maybe I could keep what was under my clothes hidden, because I hated what I looked like and if you saw it you’d hate it too.”

 

Theo rakes a hand through his hair and takes a few steps closer to Liam, breathes in deep when he stops beside him at the counter. Those blue eyes now filled tears, but Liam’s strong jaw remains steadily clenched.

 

As Liam watches his every move now, Theo starts working on the buttons of his shirt, undoing each one with care.

 

“I thought that if I kept myself from you, you’d give up and let it go. You’d be happy with the bits you got, even if it was only half of me.” he says and stops at the last button, “But you, god Liam, you deserve more, you deserve so much more.”

 

“Theo…”

 

Then, Theo lets the shirt drop off his shoulders and he’s left exposed before Liam. All his lumps and bumps, the curves of his hips, faint white stretch marks up his sides, his belly bubbling over his belt. All of him as naked as he can be.

 

And still, this boy looks at him with eyes as full of awe and wonder as they were on the night they met, just as they have always been whenever he looked at Theo.

 

“Here I am Liam. This is all of me.” he says and drops his hands at his sides, having offered his all. Having laid it bare for acceptance.

 

Liam comes closer, taking in the sight of Theo without shame, appreciating what he’s missed out on. His hand tentatively comes up to Theo’s hip and his thumb rubs a circle there. Theo shivers at the touch.

 

He looks up then, gives Theo a weak smile and says, “And I’ve always loved every inch of you. There was never any question Theo.”

 

Theo takes Liam’s face in his palms and holds him still to look at him, “And I love you for loving me this way. I love you doll.” He says and then he kisses him quietly and tenderly, and he feels for the first time, Liam’s hands on his bare skin. Jesus, it’s fantastic.

 

When he pulls away, he wipes the moisture from Liam’s cheeks and kisses the places where his tears were. “I’ll never make you cry again sweetheart, I swear. You deserve to be happy Liam, and I’ll work on that every day for as long as you will let me.” Theo promises him.

 

Liam nods, “Until I’m old and grey,” he croaks out, “maybe even after that?”

 

Theo kisses him again and whispers “Deal.” against his lips. “Always then.”

 

Theo swings one of Liam’s thighs around his waist and hoists him up before they head upstairs where he’ll let Liam explore whatever parts of his body in whichever way he pleases.

 

He’s no longer ashamed, he’s ready to be loved for exactly who he is. And he’s pretty fucking great. 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and enjoying this journey with me! I hope that anyone who read this and related to Theo in any way, takes something from this story, even if it’s just Jaymie’s voice telling you how beautiful and smart and kind you are. Because it’s true. :)
> 
>  
> 
> Love, Sammy.
> 
>  xoxo


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